Victim of the Recession

Ketchup

2011-09-05T10:58:00.001-05:00

One day there were three tomatoes walking down the street, a mama tomato, a daddy tomato and a baby tomato. Baby tomato is walking too slowly, so the daddy tomato goes back, steps on him and says 'ketchup!' "

*GROAN*

Most of you know the changes that have come about, that will be coming about.
And I feel bad about neglecting you for so long, but I didn't want this blog to just be me whining about how I think I need anti-anxiety meds or a yoga class or to get laid.

So in a nutshell:

I'm single for the first time in almost 11 years.
I'm still crazy after all these years.
Some could say I ended things, but I think that is debatable.
31 is a time, and just like every other break-up I've had (yes, all two of them prior to this one), I have impeccable timing
Breakdowns are not fun at all, especially for those of us who claim we don't have tear ducts
My friends and family are truly awesome and lovely and amazing (hereby referred to as "besties")
He took the Elvis Costello records
I received a wee scholarship to grad school!
Grad school starts on wednesday and I'm stupid excited for it.
I can't believe how much I enjoy the crushing loneliness that is living by myself.
Lines are not easily cast/reeled in/caught/kept
Thank god for the smooth jazz stylings of Tony Bennett/George Benson/Chuck Mangione
Thank god for Neko Case/the New Pornographers/Mates of State and all the other sad bastard music out there
The Brewers are in first. Like for-real first.
This past Saturday night was spent with besties, sipping mai-tai's, while I texted my dad smooth jazz puns regarding above artists and the Brewers; I hadn't laughed that hard in a long time.
Not that it happens often, but I have absolutely no idea what to do with hit-ons by people I find semi-attractive/line worthy
I'm still a super jealous person which is a total first world problem
I just learned about first world problems, from a new bestie
I collect besties like it's my job, but I have tons of new besties that seriously make me guffaw on a daily basis. Yeah, I just said guffaw
This doesn't mean I love the old besties any less.
Make new friends, keep the old. One is silver and the other gold.
Besties, booze and the brewers (andsomesupergooditwasfunwhileitlastedyouknow) have kept me sane through all of this.

Loves.

Seriously.

Loves.

Grad School Groundling

2011-05-09T16:01:00.002-05:00

It's a bit behind the times.
But.
I told you I got into grad school right?
Yes. I did. I just checked.
Oh.
Technology.

But.
Did I tell you I got a scholarship?!?
I feel a *little* awkward about it as I feel like it's kind of bragging, but I'm also kind of super excited about it.
If memory serves, it was the night I swore off heels (see previous blog post regarding Hobo-Walker), and I was going through the mail before heading out to a friend's house for Bananafest, our semi-regular and oh-so-adult game night.
I still get excited about non-bill mail, and since this was about school I figured it was my registration date or something else that people find utterly mundane but I love.

And there it was "Congratulations. You've been selected to receive the Chancellor's Award For Excellence."
What!?
I couldn't, really, believe it as I didn't even APPLY for a scholarship. But apparently it's an award that the application committee gives out.
And yes, I've looked into it. They don't just give it to everyone (yes, I literally thought that maybe everyone gets a mini-scholarship).
E thinks it may have been my essay I submitted, but I really didn't think it was that great. Was it my reasons statement? Was it just a random selection of newbies?
Most likely, I will never know.
But.
It doesn't affect my financial aid and I think it's pretty cool to quote the Miley Cyrus Show on SNL.

In other grad school news:
I met with my defacto advisor (maybe they were so impressed with my thesis idea/crazy pre-planning and THAT is why they awarded me the scholarship?) and picked my classes.
I will be taking:
Discourse Analysis with the professor who taught my summer linguistics class last summer (and wrote me a recommendation letter!). She actually suggested I take it this past fall, but as I wasn't accepted yet I decided against another "for fun." class.
Intro to Film Studies--Theory and Rhetoric. You are all going to hate me even more than you already do.

Both classes are in the late afternoon and are only one day a week. Work knows and is okay with me leaving early/coming early to get my 40 hours.

The only problem?
I have to wait until FALL to start!
I'm such a nerd.
At least I have my summer reading list to keep up with.

Supes loves academia.

Read This Now! The Purity Myth by Jessica Valenti

2011-05-07T15:59:00.000-05:00

So I've never really, ever, written a book review. And I don't really know how this is going to go.
BUT it just so happens that one of my new favorite websites Bitch Flicks has a reading list over at amazon and since I just can't wait for school to start to get my academic on, I've decided to create a library list of the books!

If you live in Milwaukee, and have a library card, and are (like me) an amnesiac when it comes time to check out books/cds/dvds (what do I get? what was the name of...), the libes has an awesome feature that allows you to build lists! LISTS I SAY!
(Full disclosure; even though I'm a total slob and completely disorganized at all times, I love Love LOVE lists.)
This is incredibly helpful for when, say, you're reading a book review in the paper (it doesn't have to the New York Times Book Review, although it does let me get my pretension on in the comfort of my own home) and you think it sounds right up your alley. You have a myriad of options:
1. Write it down in a notebook you keep of "books to read"
2. Write it down on a piece of paper you will then lose and then find and throw away wondering why you wrote that down.
3. Get on your computer (which most of you have in your phones these days anyway and let's be real, you're not anywhere your phone isn't), login into your acct. and throw it on the list! So super easy!

The lists also enable you request the item if it's not at your local library or you can see where it IS at and seek it out with the help of your friendly (sometimes) librarian.

So while on lunch at work on a particularly lazy/cold day, I decided to create my Bitch Flicks list. They didn't have EVERY book on the list, but I was quite surprised by the amount they did have.

If you can't tell, I love the public library.

So first up on my awesome new feminist reading list (which is not in any particular order) was The Purity Myth by Jessica Valenti. I was super excited to read it as I've read lots about the author in various outlets, she created (or co-created) Feministing.com and she seems pretty cool. AND her name is Jessica!

I loved the book. It made me laugh and got me angry from page to page. While I was one of those kids who grew up in a "no sex until you're married" household, I didn't attend a purity ball (which are federally funded! How awesome is that?!?!). But, I had to work through some major, MAJOR guilt about pre-marital sex. Science facts. (In all fairness, my brother was also held to the same standard as I was and he actually did keep his end of the bargain! Good job, brother!)

It brought back memories of my abstinence only education in jr. high which I thought was great at the time because when I was 13 I was thoroughly convinced that I would be a virgin until I was married. Even though my parents didn't wait, my mom's mom didn't wait, my aunts and uncles didn't wait, no one in the WORLD seemed to wait but I knew that I would, because I was so very pure and smart and NOT SLUTTY.

Some fun facts from my childhood:
Mom, what's a slut?
A slut is someone who has sex before they're married.
(I love my mom, seriously, she is super awesome, and know now that she was just using this as a tactic to ensure that I didn't have sex, but I think this says a lot about our culture)
It was also understood that if I got pregnant while in high school I would be kicked out of the house. Another clever ruse by my mom which was broken when a friend of mine DID get pregnant and had to give the baby up for adoption otherwise her parents would have kicked her out and my mom expressed her disgust at that. When I asked my mom about it she said, "You didn't get pregnant did you?" No I didn't.
I was deathly afraid of getting pregnant because I thought I would get kicked out.

Anys.

The Sex Respect program is what I was taught in jr. high, and it was awesome (I hope at this point that when I use awesome I mean ridick and totally antiquated). A quick visit to their archaic website and I came up with this gem regarding what will happen if you engage in pre-marital sex:

Premarital sex breaks up couples or pushes them into bad marriages. It fools people into marrying the wrong person. It leads to unhappiness, divorce, extramarital affairs, and dissatisfaction. It denies the couples bonding experience.

I'm not saying that pre-marital sex doesn't do this for some people. I'm sure there has to be some basis for this, somewhere no matter how archaic the research on the website is (the mid-80s).

And there is some awesome anti-choice rhetoric on there too, obs, because controlling women's bodies is actually what the virgin thing is about.

I wish I still had the book here so I could quote it, but alas it had to go back to the library. Any further posts in reference to awesome books I will retain so I can share accordingly. And of course the book is full of amazing quotes from abstinence only educators and law-makers who only think religious virgins who were brutally raped should be allowed abortions. Oh if only I were making that up:

BILL NAPOLI: A real-life description to me would be a rape victim, brutally raped, savaged. The girl was a virgin. She was religious. She planned on saving her virginity until she was married. She was brutalized and raped, sodomized as bad as you can possibly make it, and is impregnated. I mean, that girl could be so messed up, physically and psychologically, that carrying that child could very well threaten her life.

And that, unfortunately, is the reason that Ms. Valenti had to write this book and why we need to read it. Because if you're not a virgin, and you get brutally raped/sodomized, it doesn't really count, cos you're already damaged goods.

Hobo-Walker

2011-04-16T16:23:00.000-05:00

Not to fret, friends. This isn't a post about everyone's favorite pig-faced governor, this is just about a girl trying to walk in some heels after a night of hcd.
Hard.
Core.
Dancing.

The week/month of concerts/dance parties began on Wednesday night when my bestie, PO and I ventured to see Ra Ra Riot at the Turner Hall. The sound isn't the greatest there, but it's so super old and it's filled with pictures of old Germans, so I kind of HAVE to like it.

Anys. We get there fashionably late, because we're super-fashionable/hot messes all of the time. The first opening band was okay. Nothing too super-special. Just kind of folk-rocky. I see a co-worker who states he may be in attendance on Mad Planet Friday for another co-worker's bday. PO states that one of her co-workers will also be in attendance. Quickly, what was supposed to be a weekend of utter laziness and not going out has turned into a weekend of the yuge.

The concert is not crowded at all and the people watching/judging is in full force.
Hipsters are a tiny, tiny breed.
Our attentions quickly turn to the group of three that is directly ahead of us.
Upon first look we thought it was just a good-time gay with his two lady friends, which made me miss my ventures with J&P.
But the more I eavesdropped, the more I got the feeling that this guy was a het. When one's gaydar is off I always ask myself WWJ/PS?
Would would James/Peter say? And the more I watched, I could hear their running commentary in my head and I was convinced that he was, indeed, a het.
I seemed to have figure this out just in time, as Blondie was ALL OVER his mother-loving self. It was clear to both PO and I that while he was possibly into Blondie, he seemed to have a better connection with Brunette. And for a while, every time Blondie would be all sexy and dancey up on him, he would politely dance out of it and include Brunette, which I thought was nice.

Unfortunately more Pabst was involved and following scene occurred at least three times:
Blondie all swervey and dancey and kissy on him.
He would kiss her back, dance out of it and side up to Brunette.
Rinse and repeat.
Rinse and repeat.

On the one hand, I felt sorry for Brunette because I think she probably did like Plaidy McCurly Hair (he looked kind of like the male teacher on Glee), and I think he liked her. It was just that Blondie was way more aggressive in her drunkenness, and what's the guy going to do? Outrightly refuse the hot blonde who is all over him when his true feelings are for the still-cute-but-not-hot Brunette who isn't all over him whilst drunk?
Come on.
A dude's got needs.
*SIGH*
I think they'll work it out in the end.
(whatamieventalkingabout?!!?)

It should be noted that the above is all conjecture based on eavesdropping and reading body language.
I never said I wasn't judgmental.

Plaidy McCurly Hair left to get more Pabst (of course!) and to take a breather from his reign as Mayor of Makeout City, and a NEW group of three moved to the head of the line.

This time, a dude with two blondes. Luckily for my sanity, this group had a much more platonic feel rather than a thwarted-crush-stealer feel, but still very VERY flirty.

Who knew hipster rock shows were the breeding grounds for threesomes?

The show itself was a good, dancey time.
Sideboard: I don't think I've used the made-up word "dancey" so often. But yet.

It just feels so right.

Another side note:
What if I, homeless Barbie, created a fashion blog?
You too can look homeless, even at work! I actually think it could work.
So don't steal it.
*giggling*

Friday, I'm in love.
Not literally, but there was a super foxy, beardy guy at Mad Planet in a red and blue plaid shirt who was all awkwardly dancing. Adorbs.
Bonus? PO and I both agreed on his foxiness. This happens rarely.
Sadly, he found some tiny little black-haired lady to dance all sexy with.
Boo-hiss on mahnjays.
Other than that, Mad Planet was a ridick good time.
I had a stranger tell me they really liked my hair in the ladies bathroom.
I had a crazy-person-of-friend tell me I was gorgeous twice (I think because she forgot the first time?)
I had another person tell me they liked my shoes (tortuous devices that they are).

They played good music, I created a new non-dance called the Angry Feminist:
Stand with arms crossed, looking mad, eyes slightly slit, occasionally shaking your head back and forth. If outside, smoke a cigarette.
This works exceptionally well if they're playing "Smack My Bitch Up," fyi.

But oh.
To quote EC:
My dogs be barkin'.
Like a genius/boss, it seemed like a wise/fashionably viable thing to wear heels.
They are my COMFY heels, you know.
Bad.
Idea.
Jeans.
By the end of the night I had created not only my new wicked dance move, the Angry Feminist, but also a new walk, The Hobo.
Not only am I Jj Walker-Burch, I'm Jj Hobo-Walker-Burch.
And since it's cold/rainy/snowy there was no way I could have removed the tools of torture after leaving the bar. And so I hobbled/shuffled, like an ancient Japanese woman with bound feet, around pond-sized puddles, muddy lawns and cracks in the sidewalk.

And I KNOW heels are bad for you.
I KNOW that I shouldn't wear them.
Lawd knows I have enough height that I don't HAVE to wear them.
But they're so cute.
And I really love how tall they make me.
If they made flats half as cute as heels, this wouldn't be an issue.
And let's be real.
It's not like I buy them.
Prizes for work events, given to me by other drag-queen-sized-feet-friends, or I DID buy them but it was like 15 years ago.
Instead, I will put my effort into procuring a virtual rainbow of Chuck Taylors Low-Top Allstars.
Because you can wear those with anything.

Good Times, Great Oldies

2011-04-03T15:03:00.001-05:00

I'm still amazed that people read this thing, and that when I don't post for a while people want to know why. So. Here is my April resolution:

I will try to post more. FOR REAL.

But let's get down to business.
Guess who got into grad school?!?!?!
That's right, this awesome lady.
Sure it's on a probationary status, but with my undergrad GPA, I wasn't expecting anything less. I meet with my advisor on Thursday to discuss my potential classes for next semester:
*Discourse Analysis (the professor of this class taught my summer class and thought I would enjoy this class, and I actually think it would help with my wannabe thesis and my love of arguing altogether)
*Rhetoric, Writing and Information Technology--it sounds super dull and boring but it's online and I feel like it would probably be beneficial
*Film Studies, Intro to Film Theory and Criticism--I would love this class and if I eventually want to teach at the college level I feel like I would need an in-depth background
*Introduction to the Modern--I've taken this professor before, and I enjoyed it, and I think this is a requirement, so I'm assuming I could take it next year or something
*Feminist Rhetorical Theory--obs.

Or maybe there are some other gems that I'm totally missing? I'll keep you posted.

Still waiting on the financial aid (read: loans) to be awarded, but hopefully I'll get enough to cover the cost of tuition. I'm hoping to keep working full-time with a more flex-y schedule, but am unsure if that is a definite (fingers crossed!)

In other news.
BASEBALL STUFF!
I had visions of grandeur that by the time I posted this the Crew would be showing their stuff, first in the division, maybe leading in some other arbitrary statistic.

Instead, they look like the same old Brewers. And I don't mean the Brewers of '08 (although I don't think they showed up until the all-star break), I mean the Brewers that have some good pieces on paper, but can't seem to pull it together on the field.
OR.
That the team we're playing has a BETTER team on paper and they're pulling it together.
OR.
That the team has a worse team on paper but they're on a crazy-red-hot-streak.

*SIGH*

The West Bend Silver Lining?
They're hitting. They've still got the long-ball, and they're getting on base.
They seem(ed) (especially in the first and second games, today's game is effing torture) to have some good cohesion. The lot of them have longer hair (I don't know if this is intentional or not, but I'm trying to find the silver lining here)
They seemed to have good chemistry on the field (barring this game).
They're only three games outta first
THEY COME HOME TOMORROW.
I'm really hoping the Home Opener puts a little spark in them and we can pull out a win or that this is just a bump in our road to victory.
*SIGH*

Why I'm An Angry Bird (Military Ladies edition)

2011-02-26T13:41:00.000-06:00

While I'm still plenty angry about the whole Scott Walker fiasco, I am ALSO angry at the fact that because I'm a woman, my fundamental right to choose what to do with my body are being infringed upon.
Again.

So we're on the way back from picking up our new foster dog and like the super classy liberals that we are we have NPR on. And apparently a couple days ago they did a story on women fighting in the front lines. I immediately quipped "Well considering they don't trust women to make any type of decision regarding their reproductive health, I can't imagine this is going to bode well."

And.
Surprise, surprise:
I was right.
As I was doing a lot talking OVER the radio (yes I realize interruption is a horrible habit and one that I don't see myself giving up any time soon so apologies to all of my friends when I interrupt with a movie/song quote or some other type of amusing anecdote/anecdon't), I didn't hear one comment that was read in support of women engaging in ground combat. You can read/listen to the original article here.

The article discusses the possible overturning of the barring of women engaging in direct ground combat. While I have many issues with the military, the issues it brought up for upholding the ban harken back to the 1800s. When women were considered genteel and delicate:

Late last year, a panel of active-duty women and veterans testified before the commission. During that exchange, retired Marine Lt. Gen. Frank Petersen expressed his concerns about getting rid of the ban.

"Here is my problem," Peterson said. "We're talking about ground combat, nose-to-nose with the bad guys, living in the mud, eating what's on your back, no hygiene and no TV. How many of you have seen how infantrymen, the ground troopers, live, and how many of you would volunteer to live like that?" (taken directly from the NPR article linked to above).

Minus the ground combat and nose-to-nose with bad guys, this kind of sounds like camping. Clearly that is huge jump and I'm not trying to indicate that being in a combative unit of the army is like camping, but the fact that hygiene and tv come into play?! Does anyone join the military thinking they're going to stay caught up on their favorite shows and get to shower whenever they want? To me this is assuming that women only care about how they look and following their stories.

Fortunately, "Tammy Duckworth was an Apache helicopter pilot in Iraq and lost both of her legs in combat. Now she's the No. 2 at the Department of Veterans Affairs. She replied immediately: 'I've lived like that. I've lived out there with the guys, and I would do it. It's about the job.'" (taken directly from the article).

I'm sure there are plenty of people (men AND women) out there who couldn't live in a combat zone, myself included. Which is why I didn't sign up for military (okay and a slew of other reasons). I like my bed, I like my dog, I like pizza and booze. But to make this specifically about women, who are often put in this position anyway (why they're revisiting the issue), when there are just as many lazy men wouldn't thrive in this position.

According to the article, the question isn't whether or not they CAN do this work, it's whether they SHOULD be doing this work. So because someone has a vaj and tits that means they SHOULDN'T be allowed to fight in ground combat, even if they WANT to.

Pregnancy was brought up in this article and in the follow-up heard today whilst driving. What if the woman get pregnant and can't be deployed? Can't this be treated like any other job? You get maternity leave, you report when your maternity is up? Right? Millions of non-military women do this everyday. I didn't say it would be easy or fun, but it's an option.

During the follow-up, some people predicted women would intentionally get pregnant to avoid deployment. Thanks. It's good to know that you distrust the women in our military as much as you distrust just plain ol' everyday janes. And again, this could happen. But couldn't a man also do something to keep from getting deployed? This street goes both ways, but clearly only women are super untrustworthy. Even though they are willing to die. For your country.

And then there's privacy.

How can we trust grown adults to undress in front of each other? How can we trust them to carry out bodily functions in front of one another? Does the military realize that there are co-ed bathrooms and showers at various colleges throughout the country? So we can trust military personnel to carry guns and maneuver tanks but we can't entrust them to catch a glimpse of nip or peen without being thrown into a tizzy. Of course. THAT makes perfect sense.

And the last one that is brought up is my favorite:

Unit Cohesion: Does having a woman around create distractions? (taken directly from original article). Does the military have that little faith/trust in their male personnel that they expect them to turn into every man depicted in "Who Framed Roger Rabbit" when seeing Jessica Rabbit? Slobbering, wimpering messes with hearts in their eyes? Or is this insinuating that women are constantly using their feminine wiles to woo men and distract them from their jobs. Ladies are just too slutty in their fatigues.

And yeah, there is a huge issue of sexual assault/harrasment in the military. According to the ACLU Blog of Rights, One in three women are victims of sexual assault while in the service. The VA finds the condition so prevalent that it has it's own name MST or Military Sexual Trauma. I don't think this is going to get better while we continue to demean able-bodied and willing women who want to serve in all aspects of the military.

If this segregation continues then women will continue to be looked at as second class citizens. Because if the US Military Complex thinks that women can't do all the things men can, then why shouldn't the men within that complex feel the same way? Or the US population in general?

Why I'm An Angry Bird (Scott Walker edition)

2011-02-25T13:46:00.001-06:00

I begin with a quote from Tavis Smiley, as stated on "Real Time with Bill Maher on 2.18.11:
"These budgets are moral documents. And when we see what you put on the table, we know then what you really believe."

It turns out, that while I don't think of myself as political at all, my friends have told me that, yes I am a political person. And this blog is gonna get all political up in your shit. True!

And Governor Walker has been upsetting me (and tens of thousands of other individuals across the state AND the nation). And I've been wanting to blog about it for awhile, but was out of town, getting cold sores from the stress of it all, and I was generally getting my agitation out by just discussing with my friends.

But it doesn't seem to be letting up. Paul Krugman keeps writing about Wisconsin, We're figuring heavily into "Real Time" with Bill Maher. We're regular fixtures on the Daily Show and The Colbert Report.

And since I'm a bit of an attention whore, I like it.
But then I remember WHY we're getting the attention.
Because our governor is bat-shit crazy. Yes. I realize he's an elected official. And that 53% of Wisconsin voted for him. BUT. I have a slight feeling that if he would've been TRULY honest (not "honest" as he states he was) in his campaign, if he would have come right out and said:
"The only TRUE way to fix the budget crisis here is to bust all the unions," my guess is that maybe not so many people would have voted for him. Just a guess here, I'm no political theorist. I'm just a person who was laid-off once and decided to start a blog about my adventures in the poor-house, which due to me being born in the wrong social class, are most likely to continue on for the rest of my days.

And I'm not gonna lie. I'm a total liberal.
I have no bones about labeling myself that.
I'm not one of those who says "I'm X-leaning" or "I don't vote for the party, I vote for the person," although my paternal grandma always said that one. Even though I think she voted republican 99% of the time, but she's adorable and could do whatever she wanted. Personally I think it's because her dad was a union president and probably PROBABLY (I have no basis for this fact, this is pure conjecture) voted democrat her entire life. But like I said, I never asked her about it, so that is a pure guess.

But as her father (my great-grandfather that I never met) WAS a union president, I feel it would be remiss to NOT talk about what's happening in my state. That I love.

Supposedly, Scott Walker ran on a platform of fiscal responsibility. He demanded that the public sector unions pay into their pensions at a rate of about 5.8% (compared to their previous 1%) and pay more for their healthcare, I believe at a rate of 12.6% (compared to their previous 6%).

Honestly, I think there are better ways for the state to get out of it's deficit (raise the sales tax) or here is a fun visual a friend of a friend posted on facebook:

My Wisconsin teachers taught me to show my work: |

| |

| Deficit = $137 million |

| WI Adult Population (2009) = 4,342,866 |

| (5,654,774 total population times 76.8% adults) |

| |

| $137,000,000 divided by 4,342,866 = $32 |

| |

| Source: http://quickfacts.census.gov/qfd/states/55000.html

While I'm sure there are some people/adults who couldn't afford to pay this I know there are people (like myself, my friends, those who commented on this statistic via facebook) who would be willing to pay a double or triple share. And let's be real. I'm not flush with cash. I live paycheck to paycheck and receive no support from my parents. But I would gladly do this to enable the teachers (THE TEACHERS--THOSE WHO TEACH YOUR KIDS [yep your kids, cos I don't have any]!!!) to keep their "great" benefits and measly pay. Not to mention their collective bargaining rights.

Here is a fun twist:
While Fox News originally reported that 61% of those polled were FOR ending collective bargaining, it quickly corrected itself by saying that it actually had the figures flip-flopped (are you freaking kidding me?!?!) and that 61% actually OPPOSED ending collective bargaining rights. This can be seen here in the always funny Colbert Report. While I realize people make mistakes, this seems a little too ridick, even for my tastes.

So.
I'm just a little mad over this.
Mad that my brother, my cousins, my old teachers might get paid even shittier than they would have if this bill passes. I've heard their (and other state workers, like prison guards) will received a $200-$600 cut PER MONTH. That is a mortgage payment for some.

Mad that this bill would make cuts to a $1 billion cut to health care programs that serve the disabled, elderly, and low-income residents currently served through Badger Care, the state’s Medicaid program.
Mad that this bill would undermine all that the unions have done. I like the fact that I get days off, get benefits, and get to work in proper working conditions. This didn't happen because bosses thought the workers deserved more or better. It happened because the workers organized, formed unions and demanded it.

Mad that the unions have AGREED to increase their contributions to their pensions and benefits (the part that is actually about the budget) and STILL Governor Walker won't take out the collective bargaining language that's in the bill.

Mad that I feel this bill is going to pass, barring some Christmas Day miracle that gives three republican senators hearts.

Mad that the president has said very little about this situation as this is CLEARLY a political issue rather than a fiscal one.

But I hate to end this on such a downer (because I don't see these blogs getting any more cheery), I have to say that I'm so very proud of Wisconsin coming together, protesting peacefully, getting us much needed national attention, getting the message out that this ISN'T about just the budget, this is political high-jinks, in full force.

So thanks to all my awesome friends who keep posting great links and articles, thanks to the public service workers who are protesting non-stop, thanks to all of the supporters who aren't public workers (Ian's Pizza in Madison has received donations from all over the country and other countries, including Egypt!), thanks to Bill Maher, Jon Stewart, Stephen Colbert, Rachel Maddow (and all of their writers!) for bringing and keeping this issue in the spotlight of American politics, thanks to Paul Krugman for bringing his always super-smart analysis to this issue.

Mad love to all of you.

Keeping it Weird in Austin (but not really)

2011-02-06T10:17:00.000-06:00

First of all, I would like to welcome myself to the 21st century as this is my VERY FIRST blog post written from an airport. THIS IS LIVE PEOPLE.

My journey to Austin barely happened. As Milwaukee received the Storm of the Century/Snowpocalypse/Snowmageddon, all sorts of flights were moved and bumped. And seeing as I have to fly standby, my chances for getting on weren't looking good as the plane was full of pilots and other (read: paying) standby people.

But HARK! One seat left and it was all mine! ALL MINE!
Of course, I had to sit in the middle and that wasn't the most fun as I had a ginger who kept adjusting his junk next to me (seriously? that is SICK! to quote Angus Anderson) and on my right was an olds who was playing ridick games on his super-fancy ipad. I was slightly enthused to see this guy playing games as I fully expected him to be checking his stock portfolio. But alas, weird sports games and weird music coming from that thing.

On my flight to Denver I took in the fifth installment of Harry Potter and tried not to think about the ginger constantly adjusting his junk. So SICK!

Whilst at the Denver airport I caught up on some emails, drank a couple cocktails and met (and talked with!) a Christian Steelers fan who alerted me that the terrible towel proceeds to the the Pittsburgh Children's hospital. He also told me that his favorite player (whose name escapes me, because seriously? I don't know anyone on the Steelers aside from the accused rapist.) But this guy always liked Player X because he did the sign of the cross when something good happened, then as it turned out, on one of the team flights, while all the players were playing poker or sexually assaulting flight attendants (okay I totally make that part up) Player X was just sitting there reading his Bible. After my Steelers buddy left it turns out I was sitting next to a gay.
A SOUTHERN gay English professor. This is my life. I actually had a hard time understanding him (and various other people on my journey) as his accent was quite thick.
Texas=Taxes in my head.
But he was supes nice, let me use his lighter and referred to his interior designer husband as such, which I love.
He, too, assured me that I would get into grad school, which I found oddly reassuring even though I could have been a coke-head making up stories.

My flight from Denver to Austin was amazing. I got to sit in the emergency area which means lots of leg room AND the flight was fairly empty which mean no one was next to me!
Knitting abounded.
Then.
THEN!
Much to my dismay, I had realized I bought the wrong size yarn, and was/am unable to keep knitting until I remedy this issue.

As a side note three birds just swooped by me.
Inside the airport.
And then some stickies chased it off.
Because that is appropriate behavior for a child & animal interaction.

Austin was cold, dark and damp upon my arrival.
The next day was declared a snow day.
I'm not lying.
There was a dusting of snow on areas that didn't get sunlight.
I couldn't stop giggling at all the reference to the "cold" and the "snow day"
DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHAT SNOW IS!?!?!?!?
DO YOU!?!?!
See above for storm of the century/snowpocalypse/snowmageddon

My time in Austin was spent hanging at local eateries/pubs which were quite similar to the caliber in Milwaukee, but more expensive, and not as friendly. But I went to see EGL for his b-day and his party was a good time indeed: a private karaoke room was rented where I, once again, halted the good times by singing "Thunder Road."
I like being a crazy person.

And their new roomate had a dog! So I was very happy about that, as you know how much I love dogs.

On Saturday, after working out my impending travel plans, we played Trivial Pursuit on the capital lawn which was lovely as it was warm out (!!! do you even know how long it's been since I've seen sun?!? I didn't even have to have a coat on!!!) We then patronized a pizzeria where consumed cocktails, sat under the heat lamps and had many arguments/discussions over fun rape/forcible rape, David Letterman/Joaquin Phoenix/Crispin Glover, abortions, Brokeback Mountain and Dennis Quaid. Good times.

The evening was cut short by the fact that we had to wake up dreadfully early (330!) as my flight out of San Antonio left at 625. And San Antonio was about 1.5 hours away from Austin.

Kelly's and Katies and Lee's, Oh My

2011-01-17T21:04:00.001-06:00

We knew this weekend was going to be awkward.
And in prototypical fashion, it didn't disappoint.

Let's start at the very beginning.
A very good place to start.

Packers.
In the playoffs.
Night game.
Looking back the game foreshadowed our evening quite nicely.

PO, via fb had sprung Kelly's Bleachers on me.
I didn't know if that was a reality, or one of our gold bikini with snakes type of comments.
It turned out PO's sister, KM had a wee birthday celebration and really, really wanted PO to stop by.
As it's fairly close to where I live. I obliged.
It'd be good to have a drink with a bunch of Packer fans and see KM, whom I haven't seen probably since last year this time.

And it's insane. I have never been to Kelly's Bleachers, but it was a little bit out of control. TV cameras were there recording the insanity that is a Packers playoff game in Wisconsin.

We finally find them after wading thru a sea of out dated Packer jerseys and turtlenecks, long hair on dudes and PO's born-again, yet trashed manager.

KM is happy to see us and we see one of our St. Patty's Day's besties and we reminisce about texting to land lines. It's fun time. You should try it.

We stay for a drink or two and then head to the house party that we/I had committed to.

The house party had a Robert Goulet theme and was at an old friend's house whom I hadn't seen in years. We knew no one else there besides the host and had decided early on that we would only stay for a drink or two. It's slightly awkward as we're literally standing in the living room drinking and talking about people that no one knows.

Fortunately the house party was close to everyone's favorite lounge (and by everyone I mean PO's and mine), Lee's.

Lee's is refreshingly empty and we get our fave seats at the bar.
The yuge.
And then a group of olds comes in.
And inevitably settles next to me.
As I've had about 3-4 drinks I'm in the talkative state.
So I'm not feeling SUPER judgmental.
And the guy seems nice enough. He's happy about the Packer win.
We start talking sports and he tells me that I'm pretty, but "not in a line kind of way. Just in a conversational way" (is there even a difference?)
He tell me I have big cheekbones, which I'm assuming is a back-handed compliment as PO agrees with him.
I then make a comment about people who watch Fox News.
Because I'm that way.
And of course he tells me he watches Fox News and that he's a republican.
I politely tell him we should probably stop talking is no good can come of this.
And of course, OF COURSE, he refuses to let it go.
He tells me how when we FIRST started talking I was kind of snarky and snippy, which I found to be hysterical, because I so WASN'T being snarky and snotty. I thought I was being nice.
But now he thinks I'm so "intelligent and pretty" and how he really thinks we can talk about politics without getting nasty.
Guess how this ended.
It wasn't bad enough that we were basically on opposite political spectrums, but that all throughout our conversation he kept just telling me how nice and pretty I was as if that were enough to change to my mind about politics. Because if there is one thing I love, it's being infantalized during an adult conversations.
And yes. I realize that having a political discussion in a bar is a bad idea.
I tried to stop it. I tried to put an end to it.
But.
I love to argue.
I do. ESPECIALLY when I know I can win. And I knew that I could win.
And while I didn't change anyone's mind, I made the superior points.

PO, bored out of her mind, had gone outside to have a smoke.
Upon coming back in the conversation had turned to the deficit.
And olds was asking me what I thought we should do about the debt that we're facing.
And before I could say anything, PO asks him about the two wars that caused all of this deficit.
And olds didn't like that.
At all.
He called PO "vile and stupid" which was completely out of line.
I should clarify that this guy knew (not like it matters, apparently) that I had a partner, that I owned a house with said partner.
Not to mention he was old.
Well.
Older.
He backed off and his friends, for the rest of the night, apologized profusely for his behavior.
Which got kind of annoying. Because it was over.
The guy was a jack-ass, and for the most part knew he was to leave me alone for the rest of the night.

And in all honesty, if I would have known that it was going to last as long as it did, I wouldn't have even started talking to him/being my unusually nice self.
I will stick to sarcastic Jj from now on.
Consider this a lesson learned.

The rest of the night was actually quite lovely.
Minus apologies and brain talk.
The barkeeps got pleasantly tipsy and giggly and chest-bangy.
Our music played on the juke box, we sang loudly and proudly.
My "Thunder Road" brought down the house.
Well at least the air piano.
Maybe.
Kind of.
Meh?

My WhizBang Start to 2011

2011-01-15T07:24:00.001-06:00

Nightmares!
Cold sores!
Flu!
Homeless Hipsters!

All super awesome things that have happened in 2011,

Nightmares: Have been plaguing me lately, and I'm not one of those nightmare kind of people. (What are "nightmare kind of people" you ask? not me.)I can't remember having them as a child, but now as an adult and in 2011 I've awoken screaming. It seems to have subsided for now and I'm back to dreaming about alive and dead friends alike. I will take ghostly dead friends versus dementors and killer-fathers any day.

Cold Sores: You know what is awesome? When your nightmares stress you out to the point where you get three cold sores on your lower lip. Then, when those go away another one pops up on your upper lip. DO YOU LOVE IT?!?!? I love it. Thanks to my gayest of cousins, JT, a huge dose of lysine supplements seemed to do the trick.

Flu: Sober puking < drunk puking. I haven't had a stomach flu in about five years. But this one put the kaibash on a night out at LLL, made me only half-heartedly enjoy the Packer game (Football Stuff!). The plus side? Thank god for DVR. Jon Stewart + Paul Rudd = flu boners.
Feel free to spread flu boners around. You know you want to.

Homeless Hipsters: To be a young, foolish child again. Except I was. On New Years Day. After an amazing party at J&E's, the next morning brought a coffee klatsch in the kitchen complete with pizza for breakfast, the Rose Bowl Parade on the telly and then some MeTV videos. It was about the time when the MeTV videos started that PO and I realized we may not have thought our getting-home all the way through. Like a grown-up (or like a boss?) I thought it was Friday. In actuality it was Saturday. Which means EC was not available to pick us up. Various thoughts were submitted for review; all of these thoughts required cash which we would have to procure from a tyme machine which would require us walking around the east side in our jammies/slippers/no jacket/boston store bag of wine, blanket, fancy clothes, David Bowie picture) and PO in her fancy clothes carrying a comforter and pillow. And it was cold. Like what's-cooler-than-being-cool-ice-cold, cold. After an especially cold cigarette PO made the wisest decision of the year (literally) and called our barely legal friend JG to see if she could get us.
And. She could. Cue shameful hallelujah chorus by 28 & 30-year-old.

The good news?
I know how to knit!
I have a laptop!
I have travel plans in my future!
I get weekends off!

Black Swan!!!!!!!!!

2010-12-21T19:14:00.000-06:00

Okay.
So those exclamation points are meant to be sarcastic.

I recently saw the film Black Swan. From all of the hype and the articles I've read, I (albeit mistakenly) was expecting an Oscar-worthy film.

And.
I kind of got one. But I don't think that is saying that much, considering the current state of Oscars.
I realize that for EVERYTHING to be awesome in a movie, it's a tall order. One that rarely happens.
But when I shell out almost $10 for a movie, it's kind of what I expect.
And for an Oscar film, it's definitely what I expect.
So while the acting was superb, music was superb, costuming superb, set design superb, the characters and story could use a little work.

The characters were a little lacking:
I wanted more Barbara Hershey and more Winona Ryder, specifically. Their characters were important but weren't necessarily treated as such. The film wasn't very long and I think this could have easily been a two and a half hour film, and it would have commanded the audience's attention for that long. I would have liked a more flushed out Mila Kunis as well.

The story was a lot lacking:
I thought the film was completely predictable. Was it fun to watch? I guess, but I was secretly hoping that my thoughts were wrong and I would have liked more dancing.

So yes, it was a good movie. But only when compared to the crap they're releasing these days. We're so used to utter drivel that when something decent comes out we're quick to herald it as amazing and astonishing, when in fact, it's what a movie is supposed to be.

The good news is Sofia Coppola has a new film coming out that looks good (with music by Phoenix, I know, shocker) and there is a film called "Tree of Life" that I have no idea about, but Sean Penn is in it so it can't be that bad can it? I'll have to do some research on it, E thinks it might be an end-of-days film, which I'm a little wary about.

Restoring my Faith in Humanity, One Bus Ride At A Time

2010-11-19T21:15:00.000-06:00

Let's just get it out there.
It's been a while.
A long, long while.
And I have stuff to write about.
Stuff.
"Shtuff"
Scheise, for you proud Germans out there.
You know what I mean.

But instead of discussing what it means to blog, or what has been going on with me.
I've decided to keep it light.
To keep it cool, calm and collected.
To keep it real.

But let's get you caught up, right quick:
1. Remember when I started this blog? It was because I got laid off by the BT Supercenter? Well guess who's working for the BT Supercenter again. That's right. This one.
2. Remember when we elected a democratic house, senate and president? That was awesome, and terribly short-lived.
3. Remember when my grandma died? That blog caused some major drama from some of my cousins' mommas. We'll blog about that at a different time (insert evil laughter here).
4. Remember all my talk of higher learnin' and grad school? Well guess who's actually taking the plunge and applying. That's right. This one.

And that's pretty much it.
For now.
I mean, sure lots of other things revealed themselves to be true during the months that have passed, but I'm trying to restore your faith in humanity. Not bore you to death.

So I'm on the bus this morning. And it's not my usual bus.
I could not, for the life of me, figure out what to where this morning and thus, my comfortable and familiar 31 Bus was missed.

The 31 is a short, yet comfortable ride. I always get a seat. It's not too full, but it isn't a ghost bus, there are other corporate zombies on it. I feel kind of at home.

But alas, this morning I hopped on the 30 as it was the bus that came first and baby, it's cold outside.

And I'm reading.
And I have my ipod in.
And I'm not paying too much attention until 27th street.
Where a conversation starts to take place.
A conversation amongst the senior citizens occupying the seats specifically for them.
Two women, one's clearly a professional of some sort; carrying multiple bags and looking somewhat put together.
The other woman is possibly homeless, but oh man, is she as sharp as a whip.
The two men are African-American with pretty thick southern accents. If I were to judge their social class by the way they dressed, I would say working class, maybe one of the met teetering on lower-than-working class.

And these olds are just having the grandest of time. Talking about everything from exercise to politics to bike trails. All of them were democrats (YES!) and the possibly-homeless-lady was all anti-Scott Walker and how all the ladies voted for him cos he's good looking, to which the classy olds pipes up and says, "I didn't!"
It made me giggle.
Working class guy #1 says how he thought for sure Tom Barrett would win.

I don't know.
It made me feel good to know that across class and race, these folks could have a decent conversation.
And on public transportation in the "most racist city in the USA."

Possible-homeless lady got off at St. James and Working-class guy got off at the Dunkin' Donuts where he received a butterscotch candy from a passer-by.

Seriously, you can't make this up.

My Very First Grad Paper (please be kind)

2010-07-21T00:18:00.002-05:00

And here is the finished product...I will keep you advised as to what grad I got on the paper and in the class:

How Something So Right Can Be So Wrong: How RightNetwork.com Uses Language to Construct its Identity

Identity is not easy to define. When people define their own identity it’s often with adjectives, their role in society, and through social constructs. Adjectives may or may not be reflective of whom they are. Roles can be chosen, but are often thrust upon the user, not everyone chooses to be part of a familial situation. Social constructs are often of the user’s choosing. While one might be born into a family that identifies as conservative, one can choose a different political ideology. But what defines these social constructs? Like every other aspect of identity it is not only reliant on how it identifies itself, but how others’ perceive it. This paper will provide a discourse for the website RightNetwork.com and how it uses language to define itself.

Mary Bucholtz and Kira Hall define identity as, “the social positioning of the self and other” (586). This is made abundantly clear within a few clicks on the Right Network. The website welcomes all viewers with the R flag waving and the Right Anthem playing, without having to click anything. Americana, in all its ethnic diversities and geographical splendor is shown on the screen as images are interspersed with the following language:

there’s a new place for a new conversation and new opportunity for all that’s right a place for open minds big hearts and living out loud a place for new ideas and new voices inspired by the wisdom of past generations a place that tunes out cliché turns up the truth and breaks new ground because after all it’s a great big party and now we have a new place to play join (Right Anthem 00:00-01:42).

At this point the R logo is featured as the capital R in the word Right, which is static on the screen. The following words flash before our eyes starting slowly and getting faster and faster, repeating in some places:

Right place Right voice Right day Right crown Right ideas Right time Right fit Right people Right instance Right stories Right past Right drama Right humor Right conversation Right goosebumps Right brain Right history Right moment Right thought Right news Right interviews Right future Right journey Right now. (Right Anthem 01:43-01:58)

The term anthem is a positive one and speaks to patriotism. The fact that’s it’s an anthem, and not a mission statement or manifesto speaks to the kind of image that Right Network wants to portray. An anthem is a composition of celebration; it gives the Right Network an authentic voice, one of inclusion. To use the term “mission statement” would be one of cold, trite, public relation-speak and denote an authoritative tone. And while it would have been interesting (and new!) for the Right Network to reclaim the word manifesto, the term itself would have been enough to strike fear in the hearts of many who remember McCarthyism.

But the anthem claimed that it was about “new conversation and open minds” (Right Anthem 00:21, 00:39). The anthem didn’t use any of the “right” codes that are so often thrown around in the media. There was no talk of socialism, elitism, tea parties, big government, or family values. It used terms that anyone, conservative or liberal, would want to claim as their own. Who doesn’t hate cliché? Who doesn’t love the truth? Who doesn’t want to get inspired by the wisdom of the past?

Based on the anthem alone the Right Network wants to identify itself as the new place to party. However, when the anthem’s words are taken in combination with the images portrayed and the music playing, it’s a huge cliché. There is nothing “new” about viewing our country through idyllic landscapes or cityscapes. No urban ghettos were shown. No communities of color were portrayed. No homosexual couples were shown. The wisdom of past generations was limited to George Washington, Abraham Lincoln and Ronal Regan.

True to the Bucholtz and Hall definition of identity, the next video the Right Network features is Kelsey Grammer, the celebrity spokesperson for the Right Network, discussing not what the Right Network represents, but what it isn’t:

Things that just aren’t right; big government, more taxes, group hugs, cats on leashes (mmm...), running in place, flightless birds, grown man tickle fights (that’s definitely not right), grape flavored vodka, trillion dollar deficits, baby carrots, bureaucrats, left handed scissors, thousand dollar toilet seats [laughter] over spending, undercoating, bailouts for billionaires, pregnant...pauses, celebrity magicians, sham-wow, partisan politics, dogs named Steven [Grammer shrugs his shoulders and mumbles “I don’t know,”], government programs governing other government programs, silent lingers, debt, freezing government spending at the largest debts in history, Michael Moore in Speedos, oh dear god, Rush Limbaugh in Speedos, anybody in Speedos [laughter]. There’s wrong and there’s right. Right Network. All that’s Right with the World (Kelsey Grammer on Right 00:00-01:30).

We’re left with an image of Grammer waving the orange Right Network flag laughing. And while there is an element of humor, or supposed humor in this (the use of alliteration leads one to believe this is meant as a playful speech). The content itself isn’t so playful. While it rails against debt and deficits it also states that the Right Network doesn’t approve of freezing spending, which, theoretically, would only add to the deficit. His statements also speak nothing of the “new conversation, big hearts and open minds” that were promised in the anthem.

What is wrong with group hugs, tickle fights among consenting adults and/or Speedos? More specifically, why does the Right Network want to ensure that it’s disassociated with people who do embrace these things? They don’t fit in with the current hegemony as men (especially “right” men) don’t show sentimentality, can’t be engaged with the same sex in sexualized way, and they can’t be scantily clad. The Right Network is promoting the dominant gender ideology where (white) men are in charge and women are sexualized or diminished.

All hosts of Right Network programs are white, middle aged and male. Right Network is using the most valuable, if not clichéd, symbolic capital available to them and plastering it all over its website. Kelsey Grammer, although known for playing nebbish intellectuals, is the authoritative voice of the network. He’s wealthy, famous and well spoken.

Chris Burgard, according to an NPR article is “a self-described ‘ex-ballet dancer, rodeo bull rider, Hollywood stuntman and film director’”. (Blair, Right Launches Network to Fill Political Laugh Gap) He is the host of Running, a show which features six “right” candidates challenging democratic incumbents for their seats in the House or the Senate. His role is clearly that of an American archetype, the cowboy. He’s always dressed in a cowboy hat, denim jeans, belt buckle, Carhartt coat and cowboy boots. His commentary isn’t to provide a new discourse on “right” politics, but to showcase the humanity of the candidates. The only political discourse that is offered is that the candidates love America and are willing to sacrifice their comfortable lifestyles for a chance to serve their country in office. A typical exchange between Burgard and the male candidates is one of camaraderie. The promos featured on the Right Network and on their YouTube channel show Burgard throwing the football around with numerous (male) candidates, playing fetch with one of the (male) candidate’s dogs and congratulating one (male) candidate’s virility during this exchange:

“You just had a newborn baby.
“Yes I did.
“How old are you?”
“Fifty.”
“Man, your boys can swim.” (Running Trailer 01:23-01:29)

Even though the female candidate has four daughters, her lack of virility is pointed out as all four of her daughters are adopted. And while the exchanges with the men are playful, we only see Burgard interacting with Dr. Donna as a patient, not as a peer. He introduces her as a “little lady” and she is referred to as a “spitfire” numerous times throughout the sneak peek featured on RightNetwork.com’s YouTube channel. (Running Sneak Peek—Dr. Donna Campbell for Congress 00:26-00:28) Although she is a smart, accomplished, successful woman, her size and gender are the first thing that is said about her. We only find out her profession after her size and gender are spoken to. We don’t see Burgard palling around with Dr. Chambers, as he does with the male candidates. We only see him allowing her to doctor him, i.e. be a caregiver (Running Sneak Peek--Dr. Donna Campbell for Congress 00:38-01:40). Any additional information about Dr. Chambers is taken from her speeches or from her constituents rather than from Burgard engaging her in a dialogue.

Tom Wilson hosts Politics & Poker. Best known for his quintessential alpha-male Biff Tannen in the Back to the Future franchise, Wilson is typecast here, playing a “big white guy” with a “wife that’s really hot and people are goin’ ‘What?!?’” (Politics & Poker Trailer 00:43-49) He plays exactly that on this show which “mixes entertainers, pundits, cards and politics.” (Politics & Poker Trailer 00:07-00:12) During the promo clip Wilson asks questions that don’t seem extraordinarily biased and refers to President Obama as such, not dropping his title and replacing it with his first name as an unidentified pundit does. Wilson asks questions that are predictable, but asks them in a way that isn’t presuming everyone at the table feels the same way. Rather than asking “What do you think of the tea party?” Wilson asks a more complex version, “This tea party movement, will it last? Does it have legs? Will it get a candidate?” (Politics & Poker Trailer 01:30-01:37) The Right Network posits Wilson as someone of no consequence. He’s not an authority figure, his celebrity isn’t as widely known as Grammer’s and he speaks in an authentic voice. He’s the guy that we watch on sitcoms every night. He’s the guy husbands and fathers are supposed to emulate. His lines don’t come across as planned or rehearsed, even if they are. Perhaps this speaks to his acting talent. However, Wilson has said some of the most provocative comments on the Right Network. Wilson is giving voice to the working class male; a figure the right lauds and claims to be for. Lest we forget, Wilson isn’t a working class male; he’s just playing one on TV, or the internet. The Right Network only appreciates the working class only in an imaginative setting.

While Politics and Poker may have some of the best potential for a new discourse thus far on the Right Network, its gender politics are the same as the rest of the website. Just like Dr. Donna Chambers is described by her appearance and gender, Wilson’s “fake TV wife, Julie,” is described in a similar fashion (Politics & Poker Trailer 00:34-00:37). Like Dr. Chambers, we don’t learn Julie’s name until we know that she is Wilson’s fake TV wife. Predictably she is there to look pretty or “hot” as Wilson describes her, and serve the players food. While one could say her role is that of kitsch, she is not elevating her role as subservient wife to any level other than below her fake husband. Her comments are limited to bad jokes when serving food, “The ones on the right are pigs in a blanket; the ones on the left are tofu in a sleeping bag” (Politics & Poker Trailer 00:37-00:44), or clearing the table, “Speaking of gay marriage, are we done with our wieners” (Politics & Poker Trailer 01:23-01:27).

The show is clearly playing into the widely accepted sitcom relationship dynamic, and at least it is aware that it is doing this. However, if it truly wanted to create new ideas, new conversation regarding “all that’s right with the world,” they could reverse these roles and/or let the fake TV wife play poker with her husband and engage in the discourse that he moderates.

Kristy Swanson, although not named in the promo, is best known for her role in the film Buffy the Vampire Slayer, which, interestingly, spun off into a wildly popular series, heralded by many third wave feminists (Swanson did not star in the series). Her role within this show seems to bring in a sexual angle. She’s an attractive celebrity, who presumably identifies with the right, and the viewer sees her chastise Wilson for cheating and then states “Look at me when I’m...effing you.” The men at the table laugh and she states (or rather the editing makes it appear her next comment is), “It just makes it more fun for me.” (Politics & Poker Trailer 1:10-1:15). This show not only features the wife as a sexualized object, literally serving phallic symbols to her husband and friends, and posing for the camera, but it also features the one lone female poker player as being hyper-sexual as well, further showcased by the fact that none of the men are speaking of sex, only the women. The promo indicates that she says nothing political, and her voice isn’t heard, as it would be easily decipherable among the men’s voices, except in laughter, during the discussion of any politicized topic. She only gets to comment on the possible rule breaking that’s going on (a “mother” role), a sexualized comment (the “whore” role) and that the fake TV wife is “hilarious,” commenting on Julie’s wiener/gay marriage comment (a “sister” role). Her language indicates a desire to be “one of the boys,” which the boys seem to accept as she’s not making any real contribution to the discussion.

Evan Sayet’s Right 2 Laugh is comedy show on the Right Network, which is to feature “comedy from both sides of the aisle,” (Right 2 Laugh Trailer 00:06-00:13) as Sayet states that “comedy today is dominated by left-wingers.” (Blair, Right Launches Network to Fill Political Laugh Gap) However, every comic featured is featured saying something anti-Obama or his policies or, interestingly enough polarizing white and black people. This is clearly a showcase of right-wing comics. And while the promo visually shows female comics performing, including one woman of color, the women aren’t allowed to speak, or showcase their comedic talent. Again, mostly white males are cast in this role. However, Right 2 Laugh’s promo does feature an African-American (identified in a different promo as Kivi Rogers) comic who isn’t making a political joke, but rather a racial one:

I like white people cuz you like stuff simple. My people love making things more complicated than needs to be, like answering machines. Call a white guy and get his answering machine and “BRRIING! Hi, this is Phil, not in, leave a message. BOOOP! [Looks at watch] Done. Call any black person up: BRRIING! [Beatboxing] By the time it finished you forgot why the hell you called. (Right 2 Laugh Trailer 01:10-01:30)

Being the first African American the Right Network has allowed to speak, he qualifies himself by saying he likes white people. He’s not one of those angry African Americans; he’s a friend of the dominant culture. He then says “my people,” making it okay for him to make fun of his people and for the white audience to laugh along with him. However within the joke it’s clear that he doesn’t identify with African American’s as he doesn’t say call “one of my people up.” He says, “Call any black person up,” not just a black person but any black person. While this joke isn’t purely political, it does follow the dominant culture ideologies that have thus been witnessed on the Right Network. This African American is now “safe” for the Right Network’s audience to engage in.

He’s also featured in a promo on the Right Network’s YouTube channel meant to speak to the Right Network’s supposed diversity. The promo is called Things Arent [sic] Always What They Seem, and features Chris Burgard, the cowboy, trying to learn how to beatbox from Kivi Rogers. The words “Three Hours Later” appear on the screen and we say Burgard beatboxing and dancing, albeit poorly, and Rogers singing a country song. They both stop and Burgard says, “Right Network” to which Rogers replies “Because things aren’t always what they seem.” (Things Arent [sic] Always What They Seem 00:00-01:17)

Except this clip is showing us that things are exactly what they seem; which is what the Right Network has been doing all along. Saying one thing via their anthem and showcasing the exact opposite with their programming and promo editing. White men are sustained at their elevated status, women are kept below men and African American men get to talk only if it’s for entertainment purposes. Sorry women of color, you only get to be seen and not heard, so much for new voices.

While the Right Network tries to identify itself as a new place for conservative politics, a closer read indicates that all it’s doing is presenting the same rhetoric that not only the right has been promoting, but mainstream America in general; one of gendered hegemony, culturally normative values and racial stereotyping, American values if ever there were. But this time it’s wrapped in an orange flag rather than the red, white and blue.

Works Cited
Blair, Elizabeth, “Right Launches Network to Fill Political Laugh Gap.” NPR.org. 06 July 2010. NPR. 6 July 2010.
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=128340527
Bucholtz, Mary and Kira Hall. “Identity and Interaction: A Sociocultural Linguistic Approach.” Discourse Studies 7 (4-5). October 2005. 585-614. Stanford University. Web. 06 July 2010.
Rightnetwork.com. Rightnetwork. n.d. Web. 06 July 2010. http://www.rightnetwork.com/
RightNetwork Channel. YouTube.com. YouTube. 18 March 2010. Web. 6 July 2010. http://www.youtube.com/user/RightNetwork

In Cars

2010-07-16T06:45:00.000-05:00

By now I think everyone is pretty aware that Milwaukee is one of the country's most segregated cities. Some say Milwaukee, due to this segregation, is one of the most racist cities. While I think all of the above are true, I've also come to learn of another -ism that is a pox on our houses:

Agism.

Wednesday night Team Bananafest gathered at everyone's least favorite suburban bar and grill (seirously, can we start looking for trivs elsewhere?) and things were amiss. Everyone was running late, we weren't able to sit at our usual table, the quizmaster was some Peanuts-AuthorityFigureCharacter-Talker/Lenny Kravitz fan, and our usual shitty waitress was replaced by one that was nicer, but inexperienced.

Jbones comes in and tells us that he just got yelled at by some old broads because they thought he parked to close to their car. Jbones, ensuring that he was indeed 10 feet away from the fire hydrant, had to back up pretty close to another car. Was he close? Upon inspection of the vehicle, yes he was close. Was this old bitty unable to get out of her spot? Not in the least. So he's telling us that as he's walking in these ladies sitting on the patio were like:
"Excuse me! Do you think you left enough room for that car?"
Jbones: "What? Yeah it's fine."
OL (old ladies): Are you SURE because it's her car. (OL one motions to her OBFF).
Jbones kind of shrugs his shoulder and walks in.
So as he's telling the story, OL (owner of the car) COMES IN and rests her matronly hand on Jbones shoulder to which Jbones responds: Don't fucking touch me.
The woman is going on and on about who rude and disrespectful Jbones was. To which Jbones just kept saying, "Don't touch me. You touch me again, I'll call the cops."
The woman, visibly flustered that her mom-moves weren't working on our table yells at Jbones as she's walking out: "You're just a fucknut!" (In all fairness, some at the table thought she might have said Fuckhead. Either way, we're pretty sure we saved this woman's dog from being kicked as that was a lot of rage to let go over an imagined parking issue).
Jbones: "You're a fucking snob!"

The night ensued with us winning at trivia, and, big surprise, the woman being able to get out of her parking spot with no issue. She didn't even have the gumption to key Jbones' car or anything.
GOLDEN LAME.

I could be wrong, as I have no scientific data to back this up, but I'm pretty sure she wouldn't have had this altercation with a woman of her age/class or a man of her age/class. But because we're a young and scrappy lot, she felt the need to aver her authority.
And you know, maybe she was a parking checker, and maybe, legally speaking, Jbones was on the close side to her car (is there even a law against this?), would you get that angry? Would you follow the perpetrator inside a restaurant to give him a piece of your mind?
I've been parked in before (has she ever been to the east side?), worse than she was, and have been able to get out. I've never been that angry about it. Crap happens. I'm sure I've done it as well.
When it happens to me, I say something like "Oh for heaven's sake," and do the turnthewheelalltheway-reverse-turnthewheeltheoppositeway-forward, rinse and repeat.

I think another issue here is that a lot of people view their cars as extensions of themselves. They rely on their car to promote some kind of image/class/status that they do have or they would like to have. They are the kind of people that lame car commercials are made for.
Jbones' car is to get him from A to B.

As is my cavalier, which I often sit my ass down in:
After the Yes concert at Summerfest, PO, EC and I got trapped in the biggest bumblefuck of a traffic jam ever. We were literally on one block for almost an hour.
It's hot out. Tensions are rising, and as luck would have it we're on the same block as a parking lot.
So not only are we just trying to move, there are people in the parking lot trying to get out. You also have the resident idiots who "create" a far left lane to scooch ahead, which only exacerbates the problem one you actually get to the intersection.
Needless to say, we were all very crabby and this green Buick LeSabre-esque car totally exits the parking lot basically into our car--not hitting it, but in such a fashion that we have to let him go.
Windows are open and I say, "Are you fucking serious? Come ON."
And of course he gets all super-macho-thug on me. I can't remember all the words that were said but I know he told me to "Sit yo'ass down."
Jj: I am sitting down. I'm in a car. One has to be seated in a car.
SMT: Sit yo'ass down in yo' Cavalier.
Jj: Way to contribute to the situation.
And we just started laughing.
1. Because who uses logic when arguing with strangers? Me, that's who.
2.As if the type of car I'm in matters? ESPECIALLY when he's driving a sedan as well? Not even a sports car, or big monstrous SUV, but pretty much the same exact car as me, and he's driving an earlier model even.
I'm pretty sure he said it as an insult, but I can't for the life of me figure out why, unless he assumed that this car was an extension of myself. But even then--what is wrong with a Cavalier? ESPECIALLY in comparison to his Buick?

And then the more I thought about it, the worse I kind of felt.
Not about anything I said, or my reaction. I was quite proud of that.
But I felt bad that this guy only had his car to be proud of.
If he's judging MY car as if it's inferior to his, (and maybe it is, clearly I'm not a car person, however I am a Cars person--here she comes again...), is he expecting to be judged on his car too? And if so, then I missed the boat on Buick=Awesometown, USA.

And now for you listening/viewing pleasure:

Nights Out: Adventures at Lee's

2010-07-01T18:43:00.000-05:00

Most of you know that I'm a pretty functional alcholic.
I like to drink socially.
And for the longest time my watering hole was a little place in Bay View called Lee's.

*SIGH*
Lee's.

People knew that is where I would be any given Friday or Saturday.
With my BFF, P.
And the usual suspects; J-Bones, JJ, and sometimes AA.
And lawdy were those good times.
Themed picture nights.
Knowing you had to play Sexy Sadie if you wanted to hear Helter Skelter.
Breaking glass.
Cempazuchi guy.
Doorman.

And then.
Then shit got weird.
It seemed the group kind of got out of focus.
And no one can remember what the breaking point was.
But we feel there was one.
And so a self-imposed Lee's sabbatical was taken.

And like our drinking, we don't take sabbaticals lightly.
So we missed out on some quality Lee's time.
So after one too many nights at one of the most boring bars in the world, we decided to try Lee's again.
And it felt oh-so-good.
Like your favorite pair of jeans.
Or Chuck Taylors.

Still knew our drinks.
Still the same regs (for the most part).
But you know the saying.
The more things stay the same--
The more they change.
Okay so that is not the saying, but I like it.
Doorman is in jail!
Trifecta found God!
BT is the owner of the bar!
Credit Cards!
Internet jukebox!
Hearts hearts hearts a flutter.

Needless to say, we've decided to end said sabbatical and call Lee's our home once again.
And we love it.
Sure shit can still get wierd, but it's all in good fun.
And how can you stop going to a place where the whole bar sings along to "Your Love" by the Outfield AND Motown Philly by Boyz II Men.
You can't.
Plain and simple.
You must go there always and forever (which I can't wait to play on the juke box).

But I think the best part of Lee's is that P and I are feel as if we are in a movie/tv show every time we go.
We can't believe who we see and what they do.
And perhaps with a little too much self awareness, we wonder where we fit in the mix.

Last Lee's Experience:
(which I'm pretty sure could become a regular feature in this blog)
Jbones meets P and I there. Things are going fine, putting ridick songs on the juke box, catching up and then a scarf comment.
A Tom Selleck ala Magnum PI asks if he can compliment me on my scarf.

Jj: Here we go. Sure.
TS: Um, I like your scarf.
Clearly he didn't think his initial statement through.

Then TS's sidekick, who looks almost exactly like Jay from Jay and Silent Bob but with some weird south-side slash west coast accent starts BFFing with Jbones. The guy's harmless enough if not completely wasted. P and I were mostly happy that he was chatting up Jbones and not us.

And in walk two guys to which Jbones turns to me and says "Tears for Fears."

And we all starts singing "Everybody Wants to Rule the World."
Because these guys looked, with our boozy glasses, like Tears for Fears.

In all fairness, it should be noted that we've seen our fair of tribute artists/look-a-likes at Lee's so this has become somewhat of an obsession:
John Denver ala Muppets Christmas Album

Cat Stevens

Kenny Loggins

Lynyrd Skynrd band

And later in the night, because apparently the 80s moon was out:

Duran Duran tribute band.
Complete with groupies who didn't have state issued id's but passports.
Ooh la la.
It was all P and I could do from playing every Duran Duran song on the juke box.
Fortunately we had already spent all of our money on "Everything I Do (I Do It For You)" which was P's response to DMB that was playing, which I have to whole-heartedly agree with. Schmaltzy Bryan Adams is better than DMB or reggae any day. We also played "Angry Eyes," the instrumental version of "Invisible Touch," "Easy Lover," "Wonderwall," (complete with British accents!), "King of the Road," "Crying," and way too many other songs to recount this amount of time later.

Songs playing, laughter ensuing and Blondy McDrunktown sits next to P.
And she then proceeds to complement all of us:
To P: Purse or bangles or earrings.
Jj: Scarf, "It reminds me of Colorado." (??? Like I said, Blondy McDrunktown)
Jbones: Glasses.
She then proceeds to tell us she usually doesn't go out so she's a little tipsy.
This girl is pretty much at the bar to get h-core effed.
So we decide to keep an eye on BMcD while still eavesdropping on the TS and the southside/west coast Jay.
Good times are had and then the eggs are broken out.

No one can eat 50 eggs.
And as luck would have it, BMcD couldn't eat any eggs.
BT tells us that he bought the eggs for jocularity.
It's a gag (literally and figuratively!) that people will dare each other to eat/drink when they're good and drunk. The whole tub of pickled eggs was bought at some reasonable price and it's funny to watch people gag them down.
Down being the operative word.

As BT is passing out eggs like it's Easter Sunday, BMcD asks for one.
P and I can see no good coming from this but it's like a god-damn trainwreck.
A conversation ensues and all of a sudden I see BMcD turn and spit the egg out.
Jj: Is she spitting or is she puking?
P turns to look.
P: Uh.
Conversation stops and we decide to watch BMcD coyly spit out the egg while trying to seal the deal with some random she's sitting next to.
And then there is no question as to whehter she's spitting up like an infant or vomitting.
Emesis has ensued.
Quite frankly, P and I can't believe this just happened.
I not-so-coyly flag BT down and he watches round two.
She then grabs the bar towel and proceeds to wipe her mouth, chest and pants off.
She then thrown said bar towel on her pile of vom.
We continue to watch as the guy she's sitting with has either ignored the emesis or finds this a turn on bukake style. One can never tell these days.
We then watch her tell BT that she's vommed on the floor. She very blondly apologizes and leave.
By herself, thank god.

Full disclosure.
I'm a puker.
I've puked at various bars in Milwaukee.
Strike that, I've puked in various toilets in various bathrooms in various bars in Milwaukee.
I've never puked AT a bar.
Hells, I've never puked when anyone can even HEAR me.
I'm stealthy.
And if you're an adult.
You should know when you have to make a break for it.
There are signs.
Pupils dilate.
Mouth salivates.
And unless vomitting is a new phenomenon to you.
You know when it's about to hit.

Needless to say, closing time was an adventure, as it usually is.

Just Enough for the City

2010-04-14T18:34:00.000-05:00

I love me some Milwaukee.
I really, really do.
Some people hate it here.
Some people think it's dirty.
Some people think it's racist.
Some people think it's lame.
Some people think it's stupid.

But to those people I say MOVE!
I love Milwaukee.
What I DON'T like about Milwaukee is everyone raking on it all the time.

This all began when I was watching a Bucks game.
Yep, it's true. Milwaukee has a professional basketball team.
And they're going to the playoffs!
A commercial aired for a summer basketball camp that the Bucks were putting on.
I thought to myself, "Well how great that the Bucks will be having something for Milwaukee's youth."
And then the location of the camp was stated: Mequon.
Mequon is a "suburb" of Milwaukee
Mequon is a good 30 minutes from Milwaukee.
Children that could really benefit from a skills building basketball camp most likely can't get to Mequon.
I'm not saying children who live in Mequon won't benefit from a basketball camp.
They will.
But wouldn't it make sense to at least hold the camp in the city. Where the parents of the Mequon kids commute to for their jobs.
I realize I'm speaking in sweeping generalizations here but here are some fun facts:
The median income in Mequon is $90733.
The median income in Milwaukee is $32216
The graduation rate for Mequon is consistently in the high 80s or low 90s percentage wise
The graduation rate for Milwaukee is in the mid to high 60s percentage wise (This is up from the low to mid 50 it was pulling in about 10 years ago!).
I guess I don't understand how anyone expects Milwaukee to get "better" if people keep leaving.
I'm not saying city living is for everyone, I get that it's not.
But I feel the people who do live in Milwaukee have to explain it to our suburban friends or relatives.

I have a bone to pick with the radio station 88.9 as well.
Radio Milwaukee it's called.
And I like it.
I really do.
Sometimes they play a little too much "A Tribe Called Quest," but whatevs.
And they do play local music, which I love.
And they do this neighborhood series.
About the different neighborhoods in Milwaukee.
WHICH IS GREAT!
I love this! The station reaches all over the place thanks to the internet it shows the world that Milwaukee is truly full of diversity and neat little nooks and crannies.
So as I'm tooling around on their website I peruse the upcoming neighborhoods that will be profiled:
The neighborhoods, in no particular order, are Lindsay Heights, Clark Square, Martin Drive, Havenswoods, Walker’s Point, Harambee, and East Tosa.

What the what? While I know where some of these neighborhoods are...East Tosa?
Wauwautosa is a SUBURB of Milwaukee.
It is NOT Milwaukee.
Not to mention if you look at this map of Milwaukee neighborhoods, there are clearly more neighborhoods to profile, before we get into the suburbs.
I suppose I could be, and hope I am, wrong about the name East Tosa, and I hope it signifies a hidden gem somewhere I have never been.
But the likelihood of that is slim, I'm afraid.
I think it's even a bit more disheartening because I felt this station championed Milwaukee, and here it is pandering to it's moochy suburban cousins again.

These issues compounded the other night at a board meeting for our little old neighborhood association:
After the meeting was pretty much adjourned, one of the board members decided to talk about their trip to Arizona. They commented that they've noticed in "the south" that gated communities are a way of life.
I commented I didn't think that was a southern thing as much of a classist thing.
They went on to say how concerned they were in our neighborhood that they couldn't let their 5 year old daughter play outside because their fence wasn't six feet high.
And that they couldn't work in their bathing suit because their fence/our neighborhood wasn't walled off.
I would like to note that we live IN the city. Some would even say central city.
We, well at least me, are not about gating ourselves off from the rest of the city or other neighborhoods around us.
We are about welcoming and improving.
Greening and cleaning.
Not Gating and Hating.
What my favorite part of this exchange was that they actually thought nothing was wrong with thinking we could/should gate Cold Spring Park off from the rest of the city.
OMFG is all I have to say to that.
OMFG.

Baseball Stuff: Opening Day

2010-04-14T17:38:00.000-05:00

As some of you may or may not know.
I'm a bit of a baseball fan.
I like to pride myself on a little bit of knowledge and a lot of quotes when it comes to watching games.
Sometimes I let my emotions get the best of me and I'll shout something off-color to the umpire.
But usually, I'm able to keep it kid-friendly and classy.
Because that is the kind of fan I am.

I'm also the kind of fan that goes to games to...
You guessed it.
WATCH the game.
I realize baseball games are full of fair-weather fans and opening day is like amatuer hour.
Fortunately for us, our seats have been in sections that seem to respect the game.
I even heard the guy next to me say "Too High."
Which was perfect.
And is from one of the greatest baseball comedies of all time, "Major League."

Unfortunately, all I heard for the second half of opening day was the guys behind me talking about waterproofing your basement.
Seriously.

Now E. and I talk in games, but we keep it between ourselves. We don't announce the conversation to the people next, in front of and behind us.

But not these rural Wisconsinites.
Oh they went on and on about waterproofing your basement, Christmas tree farms and each other's last name.
I wanted to stick my score-keeping pen in my ears.
When they did talk about the game it was to offer ill-begotten facts and opinions. Which is the yuge at games, I hate it, but it's a fact.
Unfortunately, the game didn't offer me much relief.
The Crew lost by two which is an Opening Day first for me.
My fear was that this doesn't bode well for the rest of the season.
I still fear I may be right.

I apologize to the rest of my readers (the handful of you out there) that during baseball season this blog gets a little heavy with the game.

I'll try to keep it real though.
I swear.
Maybe.

This season I will try to warn you to my baseball heavy blogs with the above title "Baseball Stuff!"

Things I've Learned

2010-02-14T15:56:00.001-06:00

I know.
I know.
It's been a while.
A real long while.

So much has happened.
I've made life decisions.
People have died.
I've some things:

I've learned my insurance sucks.
I've learned I truly want to go back to school.
I've learned my love for pretty boys has only intensified.
I've learned that maybe atheism (or agnosticism) isn't, maybe, that bad of an option for me.
I've learned that death & dying is not how it is in the movies.
I've learned that nothing is appropriate when it come to death/dying/funerals.
I've learned that funerals are not planned with the dead person in mind, but with whoever is planning the funeral in mind.
I've learned that I'm pretty awesome according to my nephew.
I've learned that budgets get some getting used to, but aren't the worst thing in the world.
I've learned that my parents, although almost divorced, are totes awesome.
I've learned that no matter how old I am, I hate that I have friends who move away.
I've learned that reading can still surprise me.
I've learned that I still love having dates with myself.
I've learned that I'm no longer 25, nor can I party like a 25 year old.
I've learned that Pearl Jam is still amazing for all intensive purposes.

I think that pretty much brings us up to speed.
And now for the elaborations.
(You didn't think I was just going to leave you with that did you? Silly rabbit.)

I've learned my insurance sucks.
As some of you may know, I get my insurance through E. And as I'm sure most of you know, E works for Starbucks. Well thanks to this awesome recession, Starbucks felt the need to save more money, and in the process dick over their employees, with quite possibly the worlds worst insurance.

I have narrow, crooked ear canals. This means wax cannot come out of my ears like it does with other people. So it gets stuck in there and it makes me deaf. Not totes deaf, but it basically becomes impossible for me to eavesdrop on anyone's conversation, which is a great, great joy of mine. So when I was finally able to get onto E's insurance the first thing I did was schedule an appointment to get my ears cleaned out. I've done this numerous time before with the old insurance and this wasn't a problem, I would pay the $30 co-pay and call it a day. So imagine my surprise when I learned that there was no co-pay for this visit. The co-pay is figured out after the visit. Having no idea how insurance works I shrugged my shoulders and waited.

The JD/MD looked at my ears, confirmed that they were, indeed clogged, and brought in the MA to do the dirty work. I apologized profusely as it's a disgusting job, it has to be worse than looking at cooters.

Things are going great. I can hear! I can eavesdrop! I can turn down the volume on everything in the house! It's a miracle I say, A MIRACLE!

And then.
The bill comes.
And it's $140.
That's right, WITH INSURANCE.
I can hardly believe it and decide to wait to see if this is truly a bill or just a statement of benefits.
Well then the bill comes and it's still $140.
An irate Jj calls up the old insurance company to ask them WTF is going on.
A half an hour later I learn our insurance is great if I want to have a baby because the $4000 I have to spend for a co-pay to take place would be gone in an instant. But since I'm relatively healthy, and plan on going to the JD/MD once or twice a year (or never again as the case may be), having this insurance is an incredibly bad deal. E's paying about $260 a month for me to be on the insurance, which is only "good" if I get cancer, become pregnant or get raped/murdered.
SUCK.

I've learned I truly want to go back to school.
This is a true story.
It all began with my friends going back to school. There is nothing I love more than notebooks and pens and buying books for ridiculously academic classes.
LOVES IT.
So I did a little digging in regards to the UWM Modern Studies program. Which, yes, is a ridiculously academic route and basically if I get accepted it would mean I would become a college professor. But it would be studying everything I love and can only talk to select people about: theory! movies! culture!
Oh swoon swoon swoon.
But here is the tricky part:
Since I kind of haphazardly made my way through school the first time, doing fairly well in classes I enjoyed, writing the bare minimum for essays (but still getting good grades, mind you). I have almost nothing to get me into grad school.
Missing most notably:

The academic paper that is at least 10 pages long: The graduate assistant told me I could submit the six page paper that I have, but I don't even like that paper, so I would just be submitting it because of it's length. E told me I should just write a brand new 10 page paper, which seemed incredibly daunting at first, but considering my hatred for the Twilight series and love of feminism I thought I could easily get it done.

Three academic recommendation letters: Apparently everyone knows you don't need three "academic" academic rec. letters. Most people use an employer that can talk about your work ethic, your ability to learn, etc. But you do need at least two professors. And for someone who's been out of the college scene for five years, I thought, and so did my email contact, this could prove difficult.

But then, hark! She recommended something that seemed like a perfect fit:
Non-degree Specialty Student.
The application is $15, they are always accepting applications, I can basically take any class I want, and although she didn't say it in so many words, I do well in the classes get the profs to write me letters and maybe get a 10 page paper out of the process?
eh? Eh? EH?
The caveat is that most often there is 0% financial aid, so I would be paying out of pocket, so that is a little daunting, but also so exciting. Because if there is one thing I think I would be good at, it's being a professional student.

I've learned my love for pretty boys has only intensified.
I know this will seem like I'm forsaking all of my previous hatred-filled sentiments for the Twilight series, but here it is:
I think Robert Pattinson is Totes McGotes dreamsicle pie.
Sears Tower.
I've now taken to watching Twilight on HBO and fast forwarding to the parts that he is in.
Is he a total pretty boy?
Of course.
Plus, I thought the movie did a fairly good job of adapting the book to the screen. And let us not forget that I didn't start hating-hating the books until 2-ish, but mostly 3 and 4. This is also apparent in the second film, which I just saw. Not nearly as good as the first, and a little too cheeseball for me. Directed like a horror film, and Carter Burwell didn't do the music.
And here's some trivia for you, Carter Burwell also did the music for perhaps the prettiest pretty boy movie ever made: Velvet Goldmine.
It still doesn't make me like the books any better, although I do kind of like Alice's hair.

I've learned that maybe atheism (or agnosticism) isn't, maybe, that bad of an option for me.
Shit's gonna get deep here.
As you may have guessed from the list of things I've learned posted above, my grandma died.
My grandma, and her four daughters are all extremely religious. My dad used to be extremely religious, but has fallen away from that. I'm not here to judge other people's beliefs, but watching her hang on, hang on, hang on, even though the doctors expected her to go within hours of all of us being there, two days later she was still "alive" and I'm using that term to indicate that she was breathing. And I'm looking at her, and listening to my aunts' pray and I'm thinking, this isn't about god. This is about science. This is her body doing everything it can to keep her alive, because that is what your body does. If god wanted her to come "home" (and let me just say I'm completely sick of that terminology) he would have taken her. Presumably faster than he did. What happened/didn't happen that he needed her to stay here?I'm not here to sit and argue the ins and outs of belief systems, and I do like the thought of an afterlife, but at the end there was no beauty or grace. It just happened in a hospital bed while ~~her kids were sleeping~~ most of her kids were sleeping, her eldest was awake.

I've learned that death & dying is not how it is in the movies.
Oh but how I wish it were.
So as it is, the matriarch is dying and that brings EVERYONE here to Milwaukee. Which is ridick, because you would think something happier could do that like a holiday but instead it's to say goodbye, and we hope/are told that she can hear us because hearing is the last sense to go. Which I also got so sick of hearing.
I was glad that my brother came down, however, as we always have a good time and feel like we are the outcasts because we come the boy-child, and we lived "up north." And he and I are never afraid to be inappropriate.
Plus he brought my nephew, who is hilarious, so I was glad to have some light-heartedness there. We both decided that if this WERE a movie. E would proprose and that would wake Grandma up OR Grandma would die but our parents would get back together.
We laugh through the pain in this family.
All I wanted to do for this whole affair was have a video camera and record everything. Record the inappropriate jokes my brother and I were making, record the hysterics of my cousin, EW, record everyone going to town on their subs in the waiting room, because while we were waiting for grandma to die for 8 hours most of us forgot to eat. I wish someone would have recorded the stories that were told or not told as they weren't deemed "appropriate" to the situation. I felt it would have made a really good documentary, if not for dysfunctional families everywhere, at least for ours. Maybe the next time someone dies. Meh?
(Too soon?)

I've learned that nothing is appropriate when it come to death/dying/funerals.
My grandma was a completely ridiculous person. When she was with it, she loved hosting Christmas, loved having visitors, was fieircely independent and told inappropriate stories to anyone who would listen:

The one where she didn't know gay people were real.
The one where she had lesbians and a collie living across the street.
The one where about her wedding night.
The one about anal.
The one about oral.
The one about when she thought she was pregnant even though she never took off her underpants (I presume someone was dry-effing here).
The one where she smoked pot.
The one where she would drink a case of beer, and then cook all night.
The one where she shot holes in the ceiling.

None of these were deemed appropriate to even discuss while reminiscing about her in private company. Sorry, I didn't want to continuously think about her just watching game shows while she lived by herself. I preferred thinking about when she was able to drive and be ridiculous. So I did that, I just did it in my head, or with my dad, rather than with anyone else.

I've learned that funerals are not planned with the dead person in mind, but with whoever is planning the funeral in mind.
My grandma, being the frank lady that she was, talked about how she wanted her funeral to go. She wanted specific music played, she wanted people to laugh and to sing.
Needless to say, this was not how her funeral went. Before the actual service, some music was on, but I can't remember what. I do remember I heard "Bridge Over Troubled Water" which she liked, but that was it. There was no Jim Loving, no Statler Brothers (they were on her list she had specifically written, "Even Jim Loving!!!" because she knew how we all felt about him). I did hear some Statler Brothers after the service by my mom and I thought that was kind not enough. Which is why I'm determined to put the F-U-N back in funeral. Mark my words. You will have a good time. Of course I guess it all depends who plans it because if my wishes are not followed, I will haunt you. And it will not be a cute haunting, it will be a horror movie haunting. My favorite directive that came was that if you wanted to say something at the funeral you had to have it pre-approved and it had to be christ-centered. I wasn't planning on saying anything anyway, becasue I don't go for grand shows of emotion, and I don't need to wax poetic and what an awesome lady she was. Not that there is anything wrong in wanting to do that, my cousin KJC did write and read something that was quite lovely, however. But I definitely didn't want to say anything that had to be "approved." Homey don't play that.

And in case you're keeping score at home, I wasn't a huge fan of the "Try Jesus" booklets that were laying out next to the cheese and crackers. Nor was I a fan of them being brought to Famous Dave's after the internment (it was her favorite restaurant) and being placed on the table. Seriously? Come on.

I've learned that I'm pretty awesome according to my nephew.
Somehow I've become besties with my newphew S. I don't know what I did to earn this award, but at the big dinner we had the night she didn't die but thought she would, S stole my dad's chair and announced to his mom and dad that he was going to sit next to uncle jj, after taking forever to pick out what he wanted for dinner, he signed Z's cast, announced to us that he wanted an x-ray machine so he can look at his bones (one with wheels), and that he wanted a popsicle, becuase he loves popsicles.
"Who doesn't love popsicles?" I asked him. He then proceeded to ask the table if they loved popsicles. Which was hysterical. He was my buddy at the hospital too, playing go fish with me and wondering where my whereabouts were whenever I was not in sight. Heartzoes.

I've learned that budgets get some getting used to, but aren't the worst thing in the world.
It's true. We actually have, nay, use our savings account now. We actually can see some stuff getting done in our house in the next couple of months (might the foyer be complete one day?). We might actually be able to afford me going to school with no financial aid, provided we stick to the budget. Both E and I are horrible at having cash on us. We've grown accustomed to not being able to use the debit card unless we are 1000% sure that we do not have the money reserved for anything else (which it usually is). So when E has money he wants to spend it immediately. I only want to spend it after I've had it about a week, like if it's been in my wallet a week, it's time to go spend it, usually on booze with PO while watching a business deal go down with the hipster Jonas brothers.

I've learned that my parents, although almost divorced, are totes awesome.
Okay so this is because there was a death, and I'm full of sentimental tacky crap--"I Just Called To Say I Love You." But it's true, even though my parents are currently going through the longest divorce known to mankind, I think they are awesome. M. laughed at my fake mourning outfit, and D forgave me for not answering the phone at 6:30 in the morning (it was turned off in my defense). They are both hilarious and I feel like although I'm a disappointment to myself on a consistent basis, I'm not a disppointment to them.
Or.
If I am a disppointment to them, they hide it extremely well.

I've learned that no matter how old I am, I hate that I have friends who move away.
It's true. I've lived through this most of my adult life, and I still can't seem to get over it.
First J&P, leaving a gaping whole in our hearts and livers, then E&M whose parties provided years of storytelling and ridick-ness, and now M&Z--better known as my CSPBFFs. I realize that this is all very selfish of me, and that this is for their greater good (or so they say. jk jk jk) and I'm acting like a five year old, but I don't like it. I prefer sedentary people and cannot begin to tell you the excitement I felt when I learned that PO wanted to go to grad school here in MKE. Because it means, if I get into grad school, I will have a college buddy.
Anys.
To M&Z (CSPBFFs):
I wish you the most of luck in selling your fabulous homes and I'm sure we will run into each other someday on the flip side.
(I tried to make that as cool as possible. I'm pretty sure I failed miserably.)

I've learned that reading can still surprise me.
As some of you know, I've taken on reading all the books in the Washington Park libes. Okay maybe not ALL the books. I'm not reading the instruction manuals to C+++ or the Idiot's guide to Java but I'm going in order alphabetically for ficitons and I'm currently in the zeroes for non-ficitons. While I expected to find some interesting reads, I have to say I've read books I never would have read (Arab-American Women's fiction! historical fiction! gay-esque fiction! okay so I probably would have read that one) and learned a thing or two in the process. I'm currently in what I have to call "the unexplained" section of the dewey decimal system as the last couple of non-fiction books I have read have been about the unknown. Currently I'm reading about the Japanese equivalent of the Bermuda Triangle, which I actually did a presentation on as a 4th grader. Full circle, kiddos. I can't sing the praises of the library enough, and that is the one thing I miss about being unemployed (okay maybe it's not THE one thing I miss, but it's A thing I miss), is going to the library and hanging.
I've really taken to reading rather than watching drivel on the telly, which I rather enjoy, because while I do enjoy drivel, especially that which features pretty men, it can feel like your brain is turning into gelatin.
And as a strict vegetarian, that doesn't sit well with me.

I've learned that I still love having dates with myself.
Back in college, when I was single, I would date myself all the time. I loved it. I would take myself out to dinner, or maybe rent a movie or make something really good to eat. Or maybe just read. Anyway, it was great and I loved it and I hadn't had one in a long time, or at least something that I designated as a date with myself. But then...
A couple of weeks ago, I found myself in the precarious position of needing a ride after a night with the girls. Luckily someone was going by way of Mayfair and I had a luncheon date at one there, and while I thought I would get there at 11 in the morning, I ended up getting there at 9-ish. Never to fear. I had a bagel and some coffee and as a "reader" I had a book with me. Making my Sunday morning quite enjoyable. I read for about an hour and then I remembered they show movies for $5 before noon on the weekends. So I mosied up the stairs to see if there was anything I could fathom paying $5 for.
And there it was. Two choices: Sherlock Holmes or It's Complicated.
I couldn't for the life of me remember what It's Complicated was about so I went with Sherlock Holmes, which I might say, was pure delight. Robert Downey Jr. is awesome, it had a great occult twist which I loved, and I'm starting to like Rachel McAdams, who is Canadian, if you were wondering.
I recommend to anyone who likes British things, action and a decent story.
By the time the movie ended it was time to go to, what now was the last luncheon with my grandma, but it was a good time none the less. I probably will never have timing that perfect ever again, but it made me realize how movies and dates by yourself are great.

I've learned that I'm no longer 25, nor can I party like a 25 year old.
What a drag it is getting old.
Cue sitar music.
So the reason I found myself in the position of needing a ride, which ultimately led to a great Sunday was because I got so smashed on Saturday night that I couldn't walk.
I passed out while sitting up, had difficulties crawling and could not for the life of me muster the wherewithal to walk outside with a friend who was offering to drive me home. PO, bestie that she is let me stay over where I woke up feeling fine and ready to take on the world.
The saddest part was that I didn't even think I drank that much. But there I was the almost 30 year-old passed out like the olds that I am.
Boozeoes.
Boozoes.
I've tempered myself quite well since and am preparing for the liver destruction that is WFVIII--The Ocho.

I've learned that Pearl Jam is still amazing for all intensive purposes.
I cannot get enough of their album "Backspacer." Do you like rock and roll? Then you will like this album. My hope is that they will tour and I will get to see them yet again, because they have yet to play a lackluster show. Does this make me a huge nerd? Most likely, but I'm not going to deny it. It's good rock music. And I like, nay, love good rock music.

The Great Snow Hysteria of '09

2009-12-09T07:45:00.000-06:00

I'm sure we will have more snow hysteria this winter.
But seriously.
I really can't stress this enough.
There are about a million people in Milwaukee.
And I'm using Milwaukee collectively.
As in outlying areas and suburbs.
How is that you all FREAK OUT at the mention of an impending storm.
All the weather teams go into snow apocalypse mode.
Here are the facts, kids.
We live in Wisconsin.
A state that has a football field that is affectionately known as the Frozen Tundra.
We get snow.
We get ice.
We get rain.
We get sleet.
We get frozen rain.
We get temperatures that are below zero with and without the wind chill factor.
Or windshield factor as I used to say as child.
Sometimes it's a lot of snow.
Sometimes it's not so much.
Sometimes people have off of school/work because of snow.
Sometimes people drive like dickfaces in the snow.
We have to shovel.
We have to dig cars out of the snow.
We slip and fall on the ice because assy people don't shovel.

These are the facts.
Unless we are getting 5 feet of snow, i.e. the second ice age.
There is no need for all of this hysteria.
The streets will get plowed. It might take a while.
You might have to cancel an appointment.
Or go to work late.
The bottom line is, the freakouts need to stop.
And this is all people are talking about.
I feel like I'm in the movie Groundhog Day every year.
Because EVERY YEAR this happens.

Storm of the Century!
Storm of the Centruy!
And I wake up this morning to find that I can still see blades of grass through the snow in my backyard, the roads are wet, but I was still able to drive the speed limit.
And that was it.
Sure it's supposed to get a bit colder (like tonight!) and then the wet roads will freeze and it will be a little dangerous to go out. But most likely this will happen tonight, when we are sleeping.
And most likely roads will be plowed/salted/drive-able tomorrow when we all have to go to work and do it again.

Has no one read "The Long Winter" by Laura Ingalls Wilder? If the Ingalls can get through white-out snow (they had to have a rope from the house to the barn to find their way!), we can get through our first real snow fall.
Icy roads and all.

As a side note, it is snowing heavily right now.
Nothing that would stop me from going anywhere.
Mostly because I know how to drive and dress for the snow.

And while we're on this topic.
Can we please, PLEASE stop complaining about the cold.
And can we please stop making comments like "Where's the global warming here?"
If you don't like all four seasons, please move.
There are other states that are warmer and I would love to not hear you complain incessantly from October to April about the weather.

In other news.
Tiger Woods isn't Jesus!
How is this a shock to people?
Really?
Really?
After EVERYTHING we know about celebrities, nay, celebrities that are in the public eye and idolized, how is this a shocker?
I love the comment, "It's not that he had an affair. It's the amount of affairs he had."
Really.
So you think when a celebrity gets caught, it's just super unfortunate bad luck.
The first time they would ever cheat and they get caught.
I'm gonna go with a no.
The comment I really did love, however, was written by a former call-girl (writer for the Daily Beast) who stated that Tiger's problem was that he slept with star-fuckers. Okay so she didn't use the term star-fucker, but she stated he slept with people who wanted to be on his arm. If he would have chose a classy call girl, this wouldn't be an issue (most likely) because call girls don't stalk their clients, cause problems at home. Because, apparently, there is a call girl code of conduct, which is protecting the client at all costs.

Which makes me think Tiger is an even bigger narcissist, because he wants to be with ladies who actually WANT him, not just pretend to want him.

And since I love segways (the literary device, not the motorized device), at one of Obama's town hall meetings, a kid who looked as if he were about 16 asked the president if he's thought about decriminalizing gambling, prostitution, marijuana, and other non-violent victimless crimes. And while the whole crowd laughed at this idea, "Silly child" they were most likely thinking.

But.
Why not?
To quote E, "It would be political suicide."
Would it?
Would bringing us out of the recession be political suicide?
People need to think out of the box for this. We are no longer an industrial country.
And what makes money?
And has been around since biblical times?
Gambling, prostitution, and drugs.
I've been saying it for years and I'll say it again.
I think if you legalize marijauna, tax the shit out of it, and donezo!
Economy fixed!
Is it that simple?
God I hope not, because if it were that simple we should all be kicking ourselves for not doing this 24 years ago.
But it is something I think needs to be looked into.
Even the police chief on Law and Order smokes pot for her cancer!

And prostitution, why not have it be legal?
I don't understand that at all.
Because it's sex?
Because it's sex out of marriage?
We're still up in arms about this?
Seriously?
Bah Humbug.

Why I love Don Draper

2009-11-11T11:05:00.000-06:00

Maybe I was in a weird place night, drinking boxed wine and eating homemade tostadas (I really don't think I will ever buy pre-made tostada shells again!), E was in the other room and I settled in for a night of catching up on my favorite television shows.

I should preface by saying that while by and large I do love Mad Men, some shows are kind of hit or miss. But this episode.
This episode drew me in.
It was almost like a movie, complete with happy-ish ending.
I loved it.

And.

I'm gonna say it.

I love Don Draper.
I love his character, even though everything in me as a feminist says I shouldn't.
But he's dreamy!
He's a bad boy!
Sometimes he likes his kids!
He's successful!
He's good at his job!

So while my love of Don Draper is unabashed, I can't help wondering why I like him. Do his looks trump everything? It's similar to the movie High Fidelity.
You're rooting for John Cusack.
But why?
He's a horrible horrible person.
And even though you know this about him, something still draws you in.
Is it cos you know deep down John Cusack=Lloyd Dobler?
I don't know.
I can't explain it. I have no such history with Don Draper.
Nothing in the show indicates that he will eventually be a good person.
He continues to drink and smoke like a banshee (but who looks better doing it? eh? Eh? EH?)
He continues to have mistresses.
He has started taking a more active role in his kids' life, which I guess is a bonus, but could also be related to him effing the teacher.
Yet there I was enthralled in this season-ender.

So.
This last episode got me thinking.
Do I hate Betty simply because she's with Don and I'm a jealous viewer?
She gets to look at Don the whole time the tv is off and I'm relegated to just viewing him for 44 minutes on a Sunday night?
I will be the first to admit.
I'm a totally jealous person, being a perpetual have-not, it's really REALLY easy to do.
But then it hit me.
I don't like Betty's character because she's a thank-less whiner.
She's weak.
She lets thinks happen TO her rather than just doing them.
Even her affair is/was passive.
There is no depth to her, unlike the other female characters on the show.
Rather than moving up, like every other main woman character on the show, she's moving laterally, or stationarily (is that even a word?).
It's like a friend that just keeps making the same mistake with a different name.
Except she's not my friend, but yet I have to hear about it constantly (or at least every Sunday for 44 minutes).
I know!
It's like my annoying co-worker who is a total martyr for EVERY effing cause in the world, and you would never talk to this person otherwise, but there you are, trapped on a lunch break and you have to hear all of her "Woe is me" tales, except you could give two flying f-bombs about her life.
That is exactly how the Betty Draper situation is.
Except I can turn Mrs. Draper off.
I never do, but the option is always there.

The Never-Ending Recession

2009-11-08T17:20:00.000-06:00

And I'm back.
I wish I had lots to say.
What I've been up to.
What's the latest news from Joe.
Unfortunately.
Unemployment is now in double digits, and I have to say.
I feel kind of left out.
Because technically I should be part of that scene, you know?
Ooh!
Ooh!
I DID make the realization that I am probably one of the 9 million UNDERemployed today.
So thank god for that.
This blog is not for naught.

It turns out that people still love to party during the recession.
We still have beer and boxed wine left over from Halloween!
SCORE!
And as an added bonus we spent less at the grocery store than I expected.
Hizzah!

The party, after much internal worrying (why I do these things to myself, I will never know) was a smashing success.
And by smashing, I mean everyone was sufficiently smashed by the end of the night.
And we were performing smash hits of every era.
Without the karaoke television.
Because apparently that tv was another victim of the recession.
We don't know why it doesn't work anymore, but it doesn't.
JT had the brills idea that we should just sing without the tv, because this is what the party derails to anyway, and since I was lit from the delicious sangria M&Z had served at the party of the first part, I was all in for this.

I got to catch up with old mates, my house was full of dogs for part of the party, and all my besties were there.
Well.
Almost all of them:
My mom couldn't make it because of my aunt's party.
LN couldn't make it because there is a recession and gas is expensive.
MG couldn't make the party of the second part because she had KG duty.
Being a parent sure cuts into the fun having time.
I know this much is true.

In other news.
E and I are still broke, but I think we're getting better at it.
The party was hard to finance but I don't think people even realized we didn't have the ridick spread we usually do, and I have to give M&Z major props for having some of the most delicious food ever served at a party. DELICIOUS!
SCRUMTULESCENT!

And in frugal gourmet news:
We learned how to can.
Aww yeah.
Color us thrifty.
Or possibly poisoned with botulism.
We don't know!
While we don't have a pressure CANNER, we have a pressure COOKER.
A pressure cooker with no gague. So we really have no idea what pressure things were cooked at, or how long REALLY things should be cooked for.
We found out our pressure cooker (most pressure cookers, really) cook at about 15psi.
So we're hoping this one does too.
We then found a recipe similar to the one we were making and copied the cooking time.
And then we canned.
Awwww lawdy did we can.

We're hoping we'll be fine as there are many other ways to get botulism that I just read about and since I haven't gotten botulism yet, I'm thinking I might have an immunity.
Jk folks, jk.
But seriously.
8 pints of tomato sauce later we are stocked for this winter!!!
False.
We are stocked for like 2 weeks.
Maybe.
But we are very exicted (already) for next summer to can salsa, and more sauce using super fly and super fresh ingredients.
PLUS! Since we now know how easy it is to can, I think I will ask for a REAL canner from Jolly Old St. Nicholas. And then my mind will be free of botulism worries.

Frugal fall gourmet:
Made my annual batch of pumpkin-curry soup.
So delicious and it really makes a lot.
I WOULD can it, but darnzoes, I made it with butter.
And I have no idea if pumpkin soup would can well even if I made it with olive oil.
Things to think about people.
Well if you're poor anyway.

Recession Part III; Week One

2009-10-08T05:04:00.000-05:00

Where have you been?
Why haven't you posted.
By now, I would hope that the readers of this blog are used to my sporadic postings.
You bloggers with real jobs and families that blog everyday just for the "love of it" amaze me.
Actually people with real jobs amaze me.
"The pay phone outside always amazes me"
If you can tell me what move the above quote is from, you will win a prize!

Well I can tell you what I have been up to:

saving the neighborhood from fire
making and freezing soup
taking part in neighborhood activities begrudgingly
getting my foster dog adopted (this weekend!)
closing Miller Park
reading a pretty bad book from the library
recovering from a two phase sickness
being a dance-dance-dance-dance-dancin' machine (watchyagetdown, watchyagetdown)
getting keys at my job (looks like somebody's a for-real employee!)
planning my annual halloween party--co-hosted this year by my CSPBFF, MG!
being text-stalked on the MCTS.

So it's not as if I've just been lazing about. Well the recovering part of sickness, yes, but for the most part even my last Brewer games (sigh.) were listened to/watched while cleaning our incessant mess of a house.

Before I delve into the details of what has been going on, I should say why this is the third (but let's be real, most likely not final) part of the recession. For October is the month that we start with our budget. Our for-real, make or break budget to get us out of debt. Not all debt, but at least credit card debt. I've asked you once, and I will ask you again. Please bear with us as we deny activities because we're picking up extra shifts, or if we can't go out because we blew our going-out money for the month (oh yes, we have a wee bit budgeted for) on strippers and cocaine.
That last part was a joke people. It would be whores.
Stripper+coke=whores
Or, you know, we blew our going out money on dog food. That is probably a little bit more likely.
On to bigger, less depressing things.

We don't need to water, let the mother fucker burn. Burn mother fucker, burn.
I had a wee bit of cash left over from my cousin's wedding and I decided I really liked the way nail polish looked on my fingers. However, it kept chipping and chipping. After two days of wearing it I looked like a hooker.
So I called the one who knows all about beauty and glamour.
David Bowie.
Jk jk.
PO.
She advised me that a base and top coat were necessary.
So off I went to Target to find a base and top coat (PO advised to not get the 2-in-1).
And that is when I see a fire down the alley.
In a garbage can.
In a plastic garbage can.
For a split second I think about not calling 911 as I am tired.
But then the whole, saving-the neighborhood thing kicks in.
So I call 911.
After 4 rings they pick up and I inform them of the fire.
Within about a minute, the fire truck is there putting out the fire in the alley, then a girl comes running down the alley to inform us all watching the action, that there is another trash can fire.
So the group of us that has amassed goes down the block to look at the other fire.
And this fire was alot bigger than our pesky fire in the alley.
My one neighbor then continued talking about how if he would have seen the arsonist he would have popped him.
These are the people in your neighborhood.

Soup is good food!
It's true it is, and E and I have been getting really good at making it.
Weekend days= bread making and soup making.
Not to mention, homemade soup is so so good for you.
Currently frozen in our freezer; cabbage-beer stew (surprisingly delicious!), carrot-dill soup (okay, would add a thickener next time...maybe a turnip or rutabaga?), homemade mac-n-cheese (okay so it's not a soup but freezes just the same!)
This weekend I plan on making the Comet tomato soup which everyone agrees is actually better than Comet's tomato soup.

Won't you be my neighbor?
As some of you know, I serve on the board of our neighborhood association.
And this year, I am serving begrudgingly.
Maybe it's the weather, or maybe it's because I've lived here a while and just see the same stuff all the time.
Or maybe it's because most people only seem to care about the board when a road isn't paved to their liking.
Oh yes. This really happens.
I am thinking I might just not have the You-Rah-Rah CSP attitude.
So we plan this event.
Fall Fest.
And it's a big event. Mostly it's for the neighborhood kids to take part in some free activities and it's a good internal marketing for the association. I get that. I really do.
It's just SO full of kids, and not quiet church kids.
But loud, and let's be real, sometimes rude and sassy city kids.
Now there were plenty of behaved kids, a surprising amount in fact. But few parents, and literally one of the parent's was wasted. So while it is a good, there is also a twinge of sadness to the event.
Anyway. So E had to back out of his previous commitment to volunteer as he picked up a shift for two hours (see above regarding recession part III), shitty? Of course, but it's not as if the event rested solely on his shoulders, and I had alerted the board that I would not be able to help until 1-ish as I had to work that day.
So I get this email chastising me for backing out and blah blah blah. Not addressed just to me, but to the whole board. I then air our dirty laundry saying exactly what I've told you; we're broke, we come first, we need the money, etc. NOT TO mention that I told the board two months ago I had to work.
I then get an email, addressed just to me, of course, saying "I do remember you saying something about that."
Of course you do.
Now.
And I suppose it might help to mention that there was a board member who didn't show up to the event.
At all.
And as far as I could tell he didn't get any emails.
And if he did, they weren't addressed to the whole board.
In spite of this in-fighting (ha ha ha) the event went well, a scant amount of money was raised, and kids got free food, games and prizes.

Logan
The weekend prior to Fall Fest was our annual Greyhound Gala, which, much to our dismay we were unable to attend due to weddings and film festivals. According to everyone, he was going to get adopted at the gala.
He is currently napping in our t.v. room.
BUT!
He IS getting adopted this weekend.
YES!
While we have enjoyed Logan's stay with us, I truly feel he will have a great home with his new family, complete with greyhounds who actually want to play with him!
Logan has also cured me from ever thinking I could handle a puppy of any kind.
Working at the WHS has also helped me with this.

It's so hard to say goodbye to yesterday.
Yeah that's right.
I'm breaking out the Boyz II Men.
Because who doesn't love/hate that song?
So my dear friend AA accompanied me to the final Brewer game of the o9 season at Miller Park.
It was, like so many other games I've seen there this year, a loss, but we had fun. And I have to say, as cheesy as it is, it was a good feeling that although the Brewers were totally out of any playoff race, and most likely finishing under .500 at that point, and there was a Packer game on, the stadium was pretty full.
Nice work, Crew.
Now comes the off-season guessing game.
Will we trade Fielder?
Who should we trade?
Who can we get for who?
Boring to most people, but interesting for people with theories.
So I will say it here first.
Fielder doesn't go UNLESS we get two ace pitchers for him.
Not two Dave Bushes.
Not two Jeff Suppans (which only one year left on his ridick contract!)
Two CC's.
Two Sheets, but healthy Sheets.
Then, and only then, will I support a Fielder trade.

Arabian Jazz
While I'm almost done with this book, I don't recommend it to anyone. While the writer has some pretty passages, as a whole the book doesn't work and is wholly unbelievable. Nurses wearing white caps in the 90s? WHAT?!? Skip it.

Sick.
And not the way skaters say sick.
Literally.
I *kind of* had a cold two weeks ago. But I shrugged it off, got a little more sleep than usual, and plowed through. Then Saturday night came and I had a sore throat.
Sore throat?
I haven't had one of those since my tonsils were removed in the 4th grade. I painted my nails, watched some recorded television, and called it a night.
The next day I felt a little worse, but stayed in my jammies all day, cleaned the downstairs, and went to bed early.
Monday, Monday. Can't trust that day.
I sounded awful, and felt worse.
Buckets. It was bad.
I went home and even though the game of the century was on, Favre-less Packers vs. Favre-full Vikings, I went to bed.
At 6pm.
And didn't wake up until the next day.
While I didn't feel completely better.
I felt a helluva lot better.
And today I'm up at 4am, blogging.
My throat is still a bit scratchy, but all in all, better? You bet!

Dancin' Queen
Not even drunk at my cousin's wedding, but I was a dancing fool. At one point it was just me and my cousin EB dancing and singing to love shack together. After interprative dancing to "Let's Stay Together" by Al Green, my aunts told me I should be an "entertainer."
Because that is a real job.

Keys.
Yep I'm a key holder now.
This doesn't really mean anything, except I don't have to wait for people to get there, and I will be able to come in whenever I want. I also got glowing reviews, but reviews don't really mean all that much to me when no pay-raise is involved.
True.
I take some pride, but not THAT much pride.

This is Halloween!
As I'm sure most of you know. I will be throwing the annual Halloween bash this year.
BUT!
Added bonus!
MG (writer of Gerni in Mke) will be hosting part one, which is a classy-costumed potluck.
Part II is the usual debauchery and mayhem that takes place almost on a monthly basis at my house.
It is recession style so BYOB to part II, although some beer and wine will be provided.

Jeepers Creepers, where'd you get those peepers?
So I am pretty sure I was texted about incessantly on the bus yesterday. It's very rare that I ever think people are paying attention to me, but this was a little strange.
First of all, the dude appeared out of nowhere, I think he may have moved to sit closer me.
Second, either my timing was amazing, or he was literally giving somebody a play by play of everything I was doing: turning pages in my book warranted texts, tapping my foot to my ipod, yawning--kind of creepy right? Or am I just totally full of myself? Either way, I like to think of as the official start of the halloween season, creeped on on the bus.

Recession Part II; Shorty got low, low, low, low, low, low, low, low

2009-09-24T06:05:00.001-05:00

Apparently, much to my shock and awe.
People read this thing.
They miss it when I don't post.
They always ask when more posts are coming.
They ask if it will continue since I am now employed.

So I will soldier on.

You may have been wondering, "What has blogger Jj been up to?"
Mostly.
I've been in a facebook war.
A facebook war with the anti-healthcare reform people.
And by anti-healthcare reform people, I mean my brother, some of his friends, and my aunt.
Mostly the argument consists of this:
If you can't afford healthcare it is because you spend your money on useless crap (extra cars, vacations, designer clothes) and really everyone should be able to budget for healthcare.
And that if we become a socialist country (I love that single payer= socialism, and I love that socialism is still a bad word), we won't get to pick which doctors we see, or what procedures to have done, and abortions! Death panels!
When a liberal like me brings up the fact that lots of things in 'Mrrrka are socialist like the fire and police departments, the USPS, the public school systems, they then bring it back to a family-budgeting issue.
So I gave up.
But I would like to say:
E and I only have one car (and it's almost paid off!), live in a place we can afford, don't buy designer clothes (hells we can't even get haircuts!), and WE haven't taken a vacation since 2002, and the $800 we spent on that vacation isn't going to help much if I needed to fix a broken leg.
I guess it's just painful to hear that people think I shouldn't have healthcare.
Because that is the bottom line.

In addition to the argument with my aunt, I have also been victim to my first facebook snub!
Can you believe it?
Aunt KB, the super anti-choice (she sends web videos!), Nobama, refused me as a friend.
Or ignored me.
I don't know.
All I know is this:
Friendship was pending, and now, I have to request all over again.
Now some of you might be saying, why would even WANT to be friends with someone like that?
Who cares?
We love Obama!
But.
She is family, number one.
I do like her, and she is pretty funny.
Sure her political alignments are all out of whack (I still don't understand how so many "Christians" are against helping the poor and un/der insured, but I decided I wouldn't play that card), and she just sent my cousin an email telling her how important it was to repent before her wedding so she can be pure for her wedding and tell her children (yep, two kids out of wedlock), that although they're here, she was still pure before god.
People, you don't even understand this, until it happens to you.
So.
I totally called her out on it.
I emailed her and said something along the lines of "Why no friend add? Thanks alot, jerkzoes." Then added something pertinent.
Bonus?
I get to see the WHOLE lot of the anti-choice Nobamas this weekend at the said non-pure wedding.
I hope they play "Low" by Flo-Rida:

Because I've had this song in my head for the past three days.
I'm a ridiculous white person.
I will probably learn the lyrics.
Yep.
I'm thinking this will be the jam for Halloween 09.
And Logan, the foster dog really seems to dig it.

Also, I may have said it before, but Bill Maher and I are of one mind.
Just sayin'
I'm very glad there is somebody famous sharing my points of view with the world.
Well done, Mr. Maher.
Well done indeed.

And who doesn't love T-Pain?

Recession Part II; Week ???

2009-09-14T20:54:00.000-05:00

I'll figure out the week later and edit it.
And then I will have to erase this whole introduction.

But.
Back by popular demand.
It's as if the fates had this all lined up.
First the CSPBFF tells me I need to right this blog and write this blog.
Then JV, one of my old corporate coffeemates tells me she misses me.

You guys!
You really do know how to make a kid blush.

So here I am, with the grand return of VOTR.
I have to say you haven't missed all that much.
Still working, although things are starting to irritate me.
Which probably means I'm a bit too invested.
It's the midwestern in me, what can I say?

Things that have happened that I've been thinking about.
E and I are probably going to consolidate our debt, which would enable us to get out of pesky credit card debt alot sooner than if we didn't.
While we were both worried about his option at first, I realized we could keep our budget for booze/going out pretty much the same! And if we take home-booze out of the grocery budget, well. Who needs to eat when you have a box of Franzia to drink.
So I'm asking all my friends to bear with us as we navigate the waters of having (and sticking to!) a budget.

Another thing that happened that I have been thinking about is Obama's speech to Congress.
And the ridiculous outburst of Joe Wilson.
What I was REALLY excited about is there was a man being interviewed on NPR who basically said my thoughts exactly.
It's not only a ridiculous lack of respect, but if you compound this with the birthers' movement, the death panels, the nazi-sympathizers, etc, it's not just a difference of opinion. There is a deeper issue.
And I think we all know what this deeper issue is.
Color!
If this were a white male democrat, I don't think we would be having half of these issues.
Yes, we would still have those calling us libbies socialists.
But I'm convinced there would be no name calling, no birthers' movements.

And since we're on the topic of racism in American.
Serena Williams had what the press is calling a "meltdown" but what I would prefer to call "outburst" or "how I talk internally."
After missing match point at some tennis match (E will be divorcing me shortly for not knowing this), she said to the line judge, audibly "I will take this expletive ball and shove it down your expletive throat."
One of my favorite games to play after an incident like this is to think of the most ridiculous swear words:
I will take this shit ball and shove it down your ass throat.
I will take this dickie shiner ball and shove it down your thunder cunt throat (those ones actually make sense!)
What can you come up with?!
But back to the race issue.
I found this interesting because, I don't particularily like the Williams sisters.
I'm still stuck on Jennifer Capriatti.
But the fact that this was the HUGE news.
Was it because it was tennis?
Was it because it was lady tennis?
Was it because it was black lady tennis?
Most of me thinks it's because it's tennis, as John McEnroe also got alot of media attention for his "meltdowns."
But I don't think they were called meltdowns for him.
He was just an angry dude.
But ladies, or maybe just black ladies, can't be angry.
We have to have a meltdown, an emotional freakout, for us to use language that way.
Just some thoughts.

In television news:
The True Blood season finale was fantastic.
I heart that show.
And I wish vampers were real.

The Brewers are still playing baseball, and I have to say, I kind of enjoy watching baseball when every strike/hit/play doesn't mean we will/won't go to the playoffs. Now I just watch/listen for fun. And it's great.
Which I like to think makes me a True Blue Brew Crew fan.
Rhyming is fun.

I would also like to take this time to apologize to my readers for letting this dear blog fall by the wayside.
I was fairly depressed and/or sick the past couple of weeks and was in no way prepared to entertain the masses with my pithy remarks about what's going on in my world.
But you guys still love me.
Just like Jesus.

This weekend was E's film premiere.
And apparently I made a faux pas by telling the director of said film, when asked what I thought about the film, "It was better than I thought it was going to be."
Oops.
E will most likely never work in this town again.
I would like to defend myself by saying that E said this to EVERYONE he saw that night.
Everyone, except the director apparently.
Would have been nice to know that.
In more defense, I thought that having been trapped in a 40 minute phone call with this dude about film theory (after meeting him once), also entitled me to this answer.
Apparently not.

And if I ever made a film?
I would like all of you to be brutally honest with me.
Just an FYI.

My hair is getting ridiculously long, but I kind of like the side swoopiness of my bangs.
It's very Mandy Slade post-Maxwell Demon.
Which is actually a science term regarding paradox.
I learned that from Carl Sagan.

In other news, I made a delicious cinnamon-raisin bread which I had to give to my grandmother as part of her 12 month Christmas present.
But rest assured some of you will be receiving this for Christmas.
See above regarding budgets and bearing with me.

The bad news?
Summer is almost over.
But my tomatoes are growing and they are constant and delicious!
Plus I still have to harvest my carrots!
Gardening is radical.

The good news?
With summer ending comes everyone's favorite time of year.
HALLOWEEN!
Stay tuned for details.

Love is kind of crazy with a spooky little thing like you.

Recession Part II; Week Three

2009-08-16T18:44:00.000-05:00

Well I still haven't gotten fired.
Or "laid off."
But I did get two wee reprimands!
Yep.

Reprimand #1:
Passive aggressive in nature, said in front of almost the entire staff:
"Having a time issue, are we?"
Which I replied honestly, "Yep, I guess I can't seem to figure out the traffic."
Which is true.
The biggest thing about this job that I don't like is that it's 20-30 minutes away.
Which isn't a huge deal, I guess. The whole "beggars can't be choosers" adage.
But christ-on-a-cracker do I hate traffic.
I wouldn't hate it so much if it was the same everyday. If I could leave at the same time and get to work at the same time. But this doesn't happen in my world.
So I continue to hate traffic with a passion.
I hate it so much that I've resigned myself to getting to work 15 minutes early so I don't have to deal with it.
I hate it so much that I've decided to skip the freeway altogether and take the "backroads" there. Which adds about 10 minutes to my drive time, but I don't have to deal with multiple d-bags cutting me off only to slam on the brakes because there really was a reason I wasn't tailgating the person in front of me.
I would also like to note that with this many people currently out of work, I would really hate to see traffic when the recession is over.

Reprimand #2 was done privately, and in a friendly tone.
I found this reprimand quite hilarious, because it plays right into my whole "Homeless Barbie" routine.
As I'm sitting at my desk-ish area, the practice manager (PM) says to me, "Do you know the sole of your shoes is coming undone?"
"Oh that? Yeah, I guess." Then I pause and maybe shrug my shoulders, as I flip the part of the sole that is coming off of the shoe, not extremely noticeable in my opinion, but whatevs. PM keeps kind of looking at me and my old old shoes.
"Is that I problem?" I ask. Thinking she's going to say something about slipping and falling, or a health issue.
"Well, it just looks kind of scruffy."
"Oh, alright. Well I will just wear other shoes then."
Because let's be real, it's not like I don't have other shoes. But I thought the way she went about it was just really funny. Like I almost had to control myself from laughing.
And to be clear, the rest of the staff, well most of them, wear CROCS.
Because THOSE are the epitome of class and non-scruffiness.
Even E was like, you should just wear your crocs.
To which I replied, "I don't want to be seen in public with those things on."
And he laughed.
Because it's true.
I will admit to owning crocs, but I wear them for their intended use, around the house and gardening.
And going into our gross basement.
Kind of like a rubber house-shoe.
Not to mention, the faux-sherpa lined ones are PERFECT for the winter-time and letting the dog out.
But we don't wear them to the store.
We don't wear them to bars.
And, I refuse to wear them to work.
At least at this point.
I have a super cute pair of pink and olive KangaRoos that I will be rocking at the Vet office from now on.
But that doesn't mean I will look any less homeless.
Just a fair warning.

Recession food:
Homemade black bean burgers made by E.
I have since deemed him the official BBB of our household.
They were delicious and will go excellently with the gazpacho that I whipped up today.
If we ever have expendable income, I think one of my first purchases will be a food processor.
Hand chopping the gazpacho veggies has deemed this necessary by my account.
But the gazpacho is delicious, especially for the first time ever making it! Here is the recipe, take from "The Complete Vegetarian Cookbook" by Karen Brooks, a cookbook picked up after our neighbor couldn't sell it at our neighborhood rummage sale. This recipe turned out great and I have to say, it ain't just for vegetarians! Not to mention, this recipe is vegan and requires no oven! And let's be real...it's been warm lately.

Gazpacho (cold spanish soup)

4 tomatoes, cut into small pieces
1 green pepper, chopped (I used a HUGE red pepper cos that is what we had)
1 onion, chopped
1 cucumber, chopped
2 c. tomato juice (in true recession fashion, I didn't have tomato juice, but I thinned about a 1/2 c. of pasta sauce and made it into tomato juice!)
1 1/2 cloves of garlic, crushed (I used about 3-4 cloves of garlic as it wasn't the freshest garlic around)
1 tbsp. parsley (I have fresh basil so I coarsely chopped about a 1/3 c. of it)
3 tbsp. oil (I used olive oil)
3 tbsp cider or wine vinegar (I used red wine vinegar)
salt and cayenned pepper to taste (I sprinkled a liberal amount of each)
10 pitted black olives (I left these out, because while I love to draw olives, they are on the food I hate list)

In a large bowl mix all ingredients. Blend half of mixture and mix with unblended mixture. Add olives if you're using them. It says to serve with croutons, but I think it's delicious all on it's own.

In other news.
Tonight's tv schedule is looking to be tops:
True Blood
Mad Men
Hung
Entourage.
Although, I have to say, Entourage is kind of getting lame. Ari isn't as funny as he used to be, and all his friends just seem to be lame. I gues it's still better than network, but it truly is a mind suck and doesn't offer too much in the way of entertainment...but maybe something exciting is bound to happen. Whatevs.

Recession Part II; Week Two

2009-08-09T11:14:00.000-05:00

Well I made it.
I've been gainfully employed for two weeks now.
Still haven't gotten fired, feel like I know what I'm doing a bit more.
But most importantly.
My first paycheck!
Without delving too much into the dire financial straits E and I seem t constantly be in (I really don't know how two people can be so bad with money, but voila!), the UI was getting hard to live on. Upon accepting this job, I was told it would be part time averaging 30 hours a week. When I worked this out with my hourly wage I was getting, subtracting out the taxes (well, an estimate of the taxes), I wasn't terribly excited at the weekly paycheck I would be getting. I took the job mostly knowing that it would EVENTUALLY get me out of the UI hole, plus eventual free vet care for the Super Code.
But Friday rolled around, and with great trepidation I logged into our bank account.
But to my surprise, my paycheck was almost $100 more than I expected!
Joy of joys!
My secret hope is that they "forget" they told me I was only supposed to get 30 hours a week, and keep letting me go at full speed.

In other news.

The 5K is COMPLETED!

The day begin wet, but by the time we got to the Sausage Haus it had stopped and it looked like I would be able to run my first 5K after all.
But then there was thunder.
Lightning.
The way you love me is frightening.
And the 5K was postponed for a half an hour.
We all huddled in the Sausage Haus, listening to the sounds of De La Buena, and eating our free snacks and coffee provided by Alterra.
After my second cup of coffee, my hands were sufficiently pruned and were losing feeling, as I was soaked to the bone and it was kind of cool out. I knew, however, that once I started running the blood would beging flowing again.
Finally they announced the race would start at 9:20.
So two hours after arriving, picking up my goody bag and free t-shirt, I finally took my place next to other soaked people.
And then we were off.
As predicted, I forgot about the cold, wetness of me, and focused on heating myself up, so I may have ran faster than usual trying to get the blood flowing to all of my digits. But with ELO's "Mr. Blue Sky" playing, how could you not run fast?!
Towards the end, I did get tired, but there was something exhilirating about running with a huge group of people, knowing that E was waiting for me at the end, and as cheesy as it sounds, having people clap when you finish.
Not to mention, the endorphin rush was perfection and lasted until about 3 pm that day!
Official time:
31:37
I was 462 over all.
34th out of 53 in my division.
150th out of 316 for my sex.
So I completed a goal!
5K-check.
Ran the whole thing-check.
Ran it under 45:00-check.

Next on the list, training for an 8K in October.
Which I think will be alot harder than training for a 5K, but I have two months to do it.

In dog news, it appears that we will be fostering a greyhound mix puppy.
Yep.
You heard right, a puppy.
I think by the time we get him he will be about 8 months old.
We've been told he has ADD, and has an insane level of energy, but with my training getting a little more intensive, we (okay maybe just me) thought it would be a fun challenge.
His name?
Logan, soon to be Detective Logan (Chris Noth's character from L&O):

I will let you know how this Adventure in Fostering goes.

In other L&O news, it turns out that our CSPBFF's M&Z are going to a wedding which will have Jeremy Sisto featured as a groomsmen. I have asked them to report back on his height, because he is a tv bf of mine, and he seems really tall. Plus he's beardy!
This has made me realize that E and I really don't know enough people.
*SIGH*
M&Z also alerted us to a Pick-n-Save on the southside that has beans in bulk! For cheap!
And how to make said beans in a slow cooker! Thanks guys!

On the docket for next week:
Brewers v. Padres, the ol' Castraburch rivalry.
Me pops' b-day/tailgate party.
E's dad and "step-mom" will be staying at the Castraburch B&B.
And perhaps the most important of all:
August 13 is National Left-Handers' Day!
Know a lefty?!
(and if you're reading this blog, you most assuredly know a lefty!)
Thank them for being so awesome.

Recession Part II; Week One

2009-08-02T11:34:00.000-05:00

As you can see from the title of this blog, I have divided this recession into parts.
According to my calculations we are in the second stages of the recession.
The job part.

As I stated before, my new gig will most likely be quite comparable to the unemployment I was getting. So while it's not exactly a step up, hopefully I will do this job well and get my scheduled raises, and then it WILL be a step up. Not a huge step. But a baby step...and soon I will be able to say:

And to keep the nautical theme going, the first week of the new gig just sailed on by.
As most of you know, I hate being the new kid.
People who know me find this to be shocking, as most people say I'm outgoing.
But this is true only in situations where I feel comfortable.
So if I don't know anybody AND I have no idea what I'm doing.
It spells critical uncomfortability for Jj.
However, if we were allowed to drink on the job, this might change.
I'm just being honest here, folks.

With that being said. By the end of the week I was at least treading water. I was able to take some phone calls, schedule some appointments, answer some questions, etc. So I'm hoping by the end of next week things will be better.

I haven't been fired yet, so that is a plus.

What I find humorous about the job is how BUSY/CRAZY everyone says it is.
Obviously they have never worked at a coffee shop when you have a line out the door.
So it doesn't seem that crazy (knock on wood). But maybe I just don't know enough about anything yet.
Which could totally be the case.
This is what I do know:
1. We get lots of birds.
2. The dr's, thus far, have been incredibly nice and approachable, which is a nice switch from other mecial practices I've worked at (vet and human).
3. The people seem pretty nice, I suppose. Lots of moms. I think I will get along with the other receptionist quite well as she reminds me a bit of my mom in her demeanor and how she relates to people. Plus she has a huge St. Bernard mix that I got to see. So so cute.
4. It's already 100% less depressing than the WHS. PLUS!

I will keep you posted as to how week two goes.

In other news:
The 5K training is coming to an end!
I run my 5K on SATURDAY!
I'm not looking to win (obs), just to run the whole thing. This could be quite the task as I totally slacked on training this week, due to E's wonky schedule. But this week we should be good to go. Upon completion of the 5K, I'm considering keeping the training going and training for the Al's Run, or I think now it's known as the Brigg's Stratton Corporate run for Kids or something.
For us native Milwaukeeans, it's Al's Run.
This would be an 8k in October, which would mean two months to add another 3Ks.
We'll see.
We'll see how the 5K goes.

Farm Share news!
Well E and I have been very successful eating most, if not all of our farm share during the week.
Most of the time we both enjoy what I prepare.
I'm not afraid to try making new things, knowing that usually E or I will end up eating it.
I've also learned I don't like beets, but at least I did try them.
Yesterday was a fail and a half for me:

Upon receiving our farm share and divvy-ing everything up I realized we had a lot of carrots. Upon looking through the vast array of cookbooks I have acquired, I found two recipes that looked interesting.

The first was a carrot salad, taken from the cookbook PO got me for my birthday:

This is a vegan recipe and while I thought it was interesting, and I will eat it, E didn't like it at all, and I probably won't make it again, although it was incredibly easy:

1/2 lb carrots
1 1/2 tbsp extra virgin
1 tbsp fresh lemon juice
1 sm. clove of garlic, finely minced
2 tsp. chopped fresh chives
salt to taste

Peel carrots; grate on the large holed side of a four sided grater. Transfer to a bowl and stir in olive oil, lemon juice, garlic, chives and salt. Taste and adjust seasoning.

Like I said, the recipe is incredibly easy, but there was something about it that seemed "too much." We couldn't decide if it was the lemon juice, or if it was because I used fresh-from-the-farm-super-punguent garlic. I should also note we did not have chives, so I skipped those. That may have helped. This was the half-fail recipe. All though now that I think about it I may try it again but with the chives. We'll see.

The epic-fail recipe I made was a dish called Carrot Timbales, which I had never made before. And although the process seemed rather long, it wasn't anything we could handle...I thought we would be making mini-quiches as the recipe called for this egg/milk mixture to be mixed with the carrots and onion. Except then in got weird. Then it instructed us to put ramekins in casserole dish, fill with hot tap water (the casserole dish) so only a 1/3 of the ramekin wasn't in the bath, and then cover with foil. They cook then you open the oven door, loosen the foil and cook for another 10 minutes. Then you let them sit for ten minutes and invert them and eat them.

After putting the casserole dish/ramekins in the oven E became enlightened with some information:
E: Jj I don't think you're going to like this recipe.
Jj: Why?
E: Well I think the reason we have to do the water thing and cover with foil is that we're steaming the eggs.
Jj: Ew. So they will be like poached eggs?
E: Yeah, I think so. But I could be wrong.
Jj: I'm totally not going to like this.

So we waited. We followed the instructions and.
E was right.
It was like five little poached eggs meals.
And if you know anything about me, it's that I only eat eggs dry.
Scrambled hard.
Quiche baked well.
There cannot be a hint of ooze from the eggs.
And these were the ooziest of ooze. Steamed eggs.
Whoever thought of such an idea?
Ga-ross.
However, if you like steamed eggs, and vegetables, this could be the recipe for you.
Email me and I will email you the recipe if interested.

Another Epic fail?
The Brewers. My team is slowly bleeding out and there is nothing I can do. First we lose to the Nationals. Now the Padres.
To clarify:
The Nats have the worst record in ALL of the MLB.
The Pads are in LAST in the NL West.
The good news is that E is a Padre fan, so there is at least that.
But still.
Ugh.

Day 139

2009-07-25T10:34:00.000-05:00

NEWS!

Now I know some of you may find this hard to believe but...

I GOT A JOB!
(throws confetti, shakes noisemakers, cheers)

It's true.

Here are some FAQs regarding my new employ:

What will you be doing?
I will be working as a receptionist/assistant at a vet clinic. This clinic also sees snakes, which I'm not terribly excited about, but I will cope. It also sees some wildlife which will be pretty cool, I think and will take me back to my Junior DNR Ranger days.

When do you start?
I start this Monday!

Are you excited?
Yes, I suppose one could say I'm excited. I hate the beginning stages of any job because I don't like not knowing what I'm doing.

You're still going to blog aren't you?
Yes, unfortunately the job pays *basically* the same as unemployment, for now. So the recession is still in full swing! Not to worry. You will still get to hear about how the recession-filled life is going, among other things.

The funny thing about this job, is I got basically via networking.
I know, I know.
I hate networking.
I truly do hate it.
I think it's entirely not fair to people who don't have an in.
This is especially true in the entertainment industry, which E has toiled in.
It's truly not about talent, it's about who you know.
And I'm finding this is true not only in the entertainment industry, but in life.
It's all about luck, not necessarily hard work, but luck.
The New York Times magazine had a great article about this such fact.
A former drug addict, now New York Times reporter.
Ask him how he got where he is today?
Luck.
Ask any Holocaust survivor how they survived.
Luck.
Just so you don't think I'm this eternal pessimist.
Although I kind of am.

So I get a phone call one morning from a fellow greyhound adopter who tells me her vet office is looking for a receptionist and while she was currently happy with her work, she did think of me and gave them my name, and said if I was interested to give them a call.

Later in the day, I called had a phone interview right then and there, and then set up an interview for later in the week. Easy-peasy as some folks would say.

I then discussed the prospect with E. Unfortunately the job is not technically full time, although I think there is potential to make it such in the future. And unfortunately, the job doesn't pay "great." But I think, as mentioned above, it will be a wee bit more than unemployment.

We decided since we have become quite awesome at being poor, minus the parts where we don't get to do anything that involves money, that if offered the job, I would accept it.

Another perk I learned of during the interview was that they offer discounted vet care to their employees! Which is definitely great. Not that Super goes to the vet all the time, but once a year (or more for various other issues that come up) that will definitely save us some $$. So it's not all bad. And, if ever want to get another dog, this would surely be helpful.

Day 133

2009-07-20T00:22:00.000-05:00

Perhaps it's because my day began with a little Christian rock from my childhood...White Heart's Fly Eagle Fly (posted so you can know what my childhood music scene was like):

Maybe it's because PO has continued the tradition of us watching True Blood together.
And in doing so we talk about how much we heart vamps then and now.
I think I can quote a lot of that movie.
It was truly one of my faves.
And began my love affair with Kiefer Sutherland.
Hearts.

Or maybe Don Henley does it to me everytime.
After dropping PO off I was driving down Vliet, which has a certain old school charm about it, and "End of the Innocence" comes on the radio.

Now as you know, I used to be what the kids call a hippie.
Except, I never, repeat NEVER liked the Grateful Dead, Phish, or reggae.
But I have always had an affinity for Bruce Hornsby.
Not Phil Lesh & Friends Bruce Hornsby, but 80s Bruce Hornsby.
My first thrift store 45 was Bruce Hornsby and the Range, "Mandolin Rain."
You don't know what you got 'til you lose it all...

So on the radio they say how Bruce Hornsby co-wrote the song with Don Henley, and as I'm driving down Vliet, looking at the neat early 60s font of Highland Lanes, and the cute barber pole outside of LA Barbers, not to mention the working class charm of the Wonderbar! and other countless establishments.

It made me think what a nice little plot of Milwaukee that is.
Clean.
Old and new melding together.
And at that moment I wished I was a photographer.
And let's be real.
Lots of people say they're photographers, or would love to be one.
But I'm not one of those people.
I know all too well that I have zero visual artistic ability.
My brain is meant to hold trivia and quotes.
And that is about it.
I have no spatial reasoning.
But I would love it if SOMEONE, someone with photographic talent would take like a series of pictures of the business establishments along Vliet.
Just an idea I have.

Usually this nostalgia thinking doesn't hit me until fall, but with my unemployment, my emotional seasons are all over the place.

Sappy?
Totes McGotes my friends.
Totes McGotes.
It happens.

Day 132

2009-07-18T11:49:00.000-05:00

I realize the last couple of blogs have been kind of downers.
So today I'm going to show you the best parts of the recession!

1. Way way less junk mail.
No more pesky credit card offers. The junk mail that is received now is mostly from area schools trying to increase enrollment. I have no idea how I got on such a list, but alas. Anys, they are easy to recycle as no shredding is required and they go directly into the recycling box in the foyer!

2. Chocolate chip cookies!
I'm not a big sweets person, but every so often I can't resist a delicious homemade chocolate chip cookie! On a side note, I believe it should be spelled c-o-o-k-y, adding the i-e only in plural form. This is how it is spelled in numerous 19th century novels and I think I am going to try to bring it back.

3. Reading!
Cheap and easy and travels well. Not that I'm going anywhere, but if I had to go on the lam, I would have some entertainment.

4. Gardening!
While not necessarily cheap, it does provide some fun, watching my veggies grow from seeds (yeah that's right, bitches...SEEDS!) and now hang with soon-to-be-ripened fruit. It will be much cheaper next year as all I will have to buy is dirt and maybe some more seeds. Maybe.

Okay so this isn't an exhaustive list, but I was just trying to perk the ol' blog up a bit.

In other news.
After a two hour rain delay, the Brewers DID indeed win. And yes while there was a home run involved, the other runs came on small ball. Here's hoping they can earn some runs for Gallardo.

During the two hour rain delay I watched Mamma Mia, the musical based on a musical based on ABBA songs. I just wanted something light, and who doesn't love ABBA?
Okay, so lots of people claim to not like ABBA but you put on Dancin' Queen and the dance floor is packed:

I'm just sayin'.
But instead of a light-hearted romp, it was just dumb. Boring. Not very many hijinks. And to be fair, I wasn't expecting a lot from this movie. I actually kind of wanted to see it when it came out, now I'm dreadfully thankful that it just bided my time until the rain delay was over.
So I do not recommend this film. DISLIKE!
I'd stick with Grease or Hairspray or Tommy or Jesus Christ Superstar or Rocky Horror Picture Show.

What else did I do today, you ask?
I read 90 books.
Sort of.
I read:
90 Classic Books for People in a Hurry.
I found it at the ol' libes.
I know, I know, I'm technically supposed to be reading the book MG loaned me, but this one just called to me...AND I finished it in the car.
True.
It's great!
It takes 90 books and breaks them down into 3 graphic boxes, effectively giving you the beginning, middle and ending of each book.
Don't get me wrong, you won't be able to talk intelligently on any of the books mentioned, but you could at least nod along knowingly.
I highly recommend this book, PLUS it opened my eyes to a couple of books I haven't read/didn't know were books and I now want to read those (Who knew so many books written before 1980 were so desparate and suicidal?)
LIKE!

In other news:
I plan on watching Twin Peaks.
I've never seen it, and am not the hugest David Lynch fan, but I do love Kyle McLachlan (especially in Showgirls...wait, what?). And I remember all the buzz when it first came out, when I was a wee lass.
I will definitely let you know if I get caught up in it.

Day 131

2009-07-17T15:40:00.000-05:00

You wanna know a fun game to play?
Why your life is better than mine.
Today is a prime example.

While the day began okay, I couldn't shake an inexplicable exhaustion.
I didn't go to bed so late.
I thought I slept okay.
But upon waking up at 8-ish to let the dogs out, it became quite apparent that I wasn't going to be able to stay awake.

3 hours later I forced myself to wake up, fiddled around on the internet, and made myself go on a run, no less tired.

The good news, is the run was a success. I completed all parts of the run, no matter I was "jogging" at a snail's pace for the last two songs. But I pulled a Kate Bush and did not give up.

Upon entering the house I see crimson splatters on the ground, along with assorted trash strewn about.
Supes.

Upon further inspection it appears that Super escaped from the guest room, although she's been having slumber parties there with Sandy each night. Apparently she couldn't take yet another game of dog Truth or Dare.
And apparently pulled the butter and the accompanying dish off of the microwave (which is about chest high on me, a five-nine or ten-er). And she had apparently cut herself somewhere.
As luck would have it she cut (probably more like a scrape) on her muzzle, no stitches, no pricey trip to the e-vet.

E gets home and is preparing for his tennis tournament, when we hear a loud pop. Upon looking out the window we see nothing unusual, perhaps a garbage can, as our block has amassed a ridiculous amount of them, fell over.

E leaves and shortly after returns.
The sound we heard was our tire blowing out.
Again.
And.
As you know, it's not like we have extra money to throw away on things like tires.
Okay so a tire is a necessity, but it's not like we have extra money to throw away on ANYTHING.
Not to mention most tire places only take cash, which for us is at a premium.
Not like I'm ever thrilled when forced to use a credit card for anything.
Maybe I should just turn to drug dealing.
Mary Louise Parker seems to be doing okay for herself.

Anyway.
The tire will be replaced, hopefully E won't miss out on his tennis tournament, as those cost some skrilla as well.

I'm not an optimist at all, but I have to assume that things are going to turn around?
But then I think, why should they?
Homeless peoples' lives generally don't turn around.
I think this is the point that most people find religion.

In other, more frivolous news:
I actually started the sitcom!
YES!
Even if it turns out to be super lame and just a webisode, at least it's something!

And.
I checked out Scarlet's Walk by Tori Amos from the library. I used to have this album, and still have all the packaging, but somehow lost the cd in the move. Anyway.
I absolutely loved this album when I had it (this was during my Ryan Adams' "Gold" and Decibully phase--these were the three albums I played almost incessantly). And upon listening to it again, I still love it!
Which for me is weird cos I'm kind of done with the whole chick singer thing (okay so that is a bit of a lie, I did just recently check out a Keren Ann cd and liked it). But Tori Amos is very freshman year of college, but this album still brings me bliss.

I've also finished reading "The Man Who Mistook His Wife for a Hat" and thoroughly enjoyed it.
Thanks CSPBFFs for loaning this to me! It wasn't nearly as scientific as I expected, but that could be for the ridiculous in-depth Psych 101 class I took at Northland College, which I actually did well in. Who knew Jj and science could ever mix?

I'm currently reading another book on loan from the CSPBFFs "The Corpse at the Haworth Tandoori" by Robert Barnard. It's a mystery, which I've decided I enjoy reading because they give me a sense of accomplishment, but tend to always be a let down at the ending. So I will give this one a go.

Recession news!
I've interviewed for a receptionist position at a vet clinic.
While it's not copywriting, it SOMETHING that I would at least be okay at (I think) and the perks are pretty good (basically comped vet visits and discounted vaccines and such!). So I have to take that into consideration as vet care is an expense.
Plus there really is nothing else out there.
I should find out by the end of next week if I get it.
Obs I will keep you posted.

Also, does anyone eat beets?
Yesterday, in a great recession moment, I made a beet salad.
This particular beet salad called for beets, pineapples, lemon juice, honey and salt.
I've never eaten beets before (but I've danced to beats, and I've read beats), I thought I wouldn't let these pretty vegetables go to waste.
It was a good feeling having my hands stained red.
I felt like a real farmer.
Especially since...
My tomato plants have green fruit on them!!!
My plants that I raised from seed are sprouting real, live tomatoes!
YES!
Anyway.
Back to beets.
So I've never had beets before, but these taste really, EARTHY.
Is this normal?
I would say they taste dirty, but it's not that.
It's like an earthy taste.
I'm just wondering if this is normal.
I can't say the salad was fantastic. It's okay, but the earthiness of the beets and the sweetness of the pineapple and honey seem like a weird combo to me.

It should also be noted that as a belated birthday gift PO, who has basically become my recession benefactor, gave me a fabulous coffee table/cook book about fresh vegetables from farmer's markets (Fresh From the Farmer's Market)! This week we get fennel and I can't wait to use the recipes listed as I have no idea how to use fennel..
PO you are awesome, and thanks for buying me drinks when I only have $2 in quarters (AA you helped in this one too).

Day 130

2009-07-16T10:30:00.000-05:00

During my blog hiatus, I'm not gonna lie.
A lot of television was consumed.
I mean.
I read and stuff too.
But after 100+ days in this recession, the fact that I am:
1. still unemployed, with no "real" prospects.
2. becoming even more poor than I ever thought humanly possible
3. trying not to go even further into debt due to my awesome non-job getting skills

I had a bit of the recession depression.
E is extremely capable of not worrying about finances, but I don't have that talent.
Maybe it's because I do the bills, but almost daily I go over our finances and almost daily I have a mini-anxiety attack.
Will it ever get better (knowing E's and my track record, not effing likely)?
When will it end (see above parenthetical statement)?

So rather than sitting around feeling sorry for myself, I decided to sit around and feel better about myself.
Yep.
I can't afford real therapy.
Well, let's be real. I can't afford much of anything at this point.
So I decided to enlist the help of television.
And I took to watching shows that would make me feel better about my own life.
I should note: By "watching" I mean I took in an episode or two (sometimes even less than this!). These aren't shows I DVR or even advocate watching, unless you like train wrecks or are going through a bout of recession depression yourself.
These shows were:

Clean House--ridiculously messy houses full of junk, and then a spunky team comes and de-clutters and re-models. I watch this because I am a messy person. One could say slob-ish. But I am not as bad as these houses. Yay!

Animal Cops--okay so the episodes I was watching dealt mostly with animal hoarders. And because animal hoarders are crazy people, their houses are/were even worse and MORE disgusting than the Clean House people because there is always animal feces/urine everywhere.
GA-ROSS. So while I may think it's gross when a foster dog pees on the floor, I always clean it up. And we don't have so much garbage that you can only see the top of the couch. One of the houses was actually like this.

Ruby--apparently if you are so fat that you are going to die you get your own television show. I'm not trying to sound super callous here, but she has a team, a TEAM of people helping her lose weight from every angle (psychologically, physically, nutritionally, etc.). I don't understand how she got this show (cos she's so positive? so cute? so southern?) but I find it highly annoying when people who have personal trainers, nutritionalists, etc, are complaining on how hard it is to lose weight. Are you effing kidding me? Is this really callous of me? I know people who have lost weight all by themselves...people who's weight/food has been an issue all their lives and they did it via the library and self discipline. Why no shows about them? Anyway, I only watched half of this show because I found Ruby to be grating and annoying and whiny and I really don't like southern accents. But the whole time I did watch this show, I felt incredibly skinny. Maybe that is why this show is so popular? Everyone feels better about THEMSELVES after they watch it?

16 & Pregnant--Thanks MTV! Way to celebrate the epidemic that is teen pregnancy! I have no idea what this show is trying to promote because it is not "don't get pregnant!" The episodes I have seen have been "Oops, I got knocked up, but I have a family that is supportive of me so this won't REALLY affect my life that much except I'm getting so fat! I'm so tired! My friends don't invite me places with them!" And of course, the end of the show is them with their super-cute baby happy as can be. I did see on an up and coming episode that one teen actually might give up her baby for adoption. Thank god. I would prefer a show about teens that have sex and, garsh, DON'T get pregnant.
Because guess what.
It's totally possible.
It's totally possible to prevent pregnancy.
And seriously, what about abortion? I would assume that on MTV (or my idea of what MTV should be) this could at least be a conversation. But apparently this is too controversial? Unless there was a "very special abortion episode" that I missed. Because honestly, I've only seen one and a half episodes.
Mostly due to the amount of vomit in my mouth.

In other news:
I would like to thank PO for treating me to a very special recession lunch the other day.
You totes didn't have to, and I'm totes appreciative.
And I'm really happy about your academic ways.
And I will help you study.
And by help I mean drink your beer and play with your dog.

Day 129

2009-07-14T14:35:00.000-05:00

The worst part about not keeping yourself up to date on your blog is counting back the days.
Where did I leave off?
What has happened since then?

To sum up:

Michael Jackson is still dead. He is not Jesus. Nor is he a vampire. Nor is he a zombie. Of course this does not stop the media from STILL reporting on the legalities of his offspring, music, etc.
I still don't have a job. Despite what seems like a blistering amount of resumes sent out, applications submitted, this victim of the recession is still unemployed. In fact, I think I may be getting WORSE at interviews. Mostly because I've become bitter about this whole recession.
I've started training for a 5K. I know you runners out there will laugh and guffaw at this, as you most likely run a 5K for your morning run. But slovenly, alcoholic types like me need to train for such an affair. The good news is I don't hate it, and my pants fit better. The bad news? I need new running shoes and most #Ks need a registration fee. Of course the money goes to whatever you're running for, but still. For this unemployed future marathon runner (that is my goal in all of this), it's money that I, quite frankly, don't have.
I've been reading. Since my last blog posting I think I've read 3 books. I like to read.
I've contacted some grad school people. As it appears that I will never work in this town again, I might as well do something that I really love--theorizing and looking too cool for school. I'm not counting on this, but I think I really would like to go back. And do well.
E and I have begun the super-duper beginning stages of writing a sitcom. My goal is to have an episode done by the end of this week. I have had a major case of the ol' writer's block so I'm hoping this will jumpstart something.
I still hate the Cubs.
Prince Fielder won the home run derby. Say what you will about the All-Star Game, the All-Star Break, but it was pretty cool to see ALL the players in the HR derby go nuts with homeruns. And I'm a small-ball person.
I'm still in love with the library.
I am now the secretary of the Cold Spring Park Neighborhood Association. Which means I will be taking notes at the meetings. I was doing this anyway, but this also means, unofficially, that I will be making sure people actually do what they say they are going to do. Because I am bossy.
MTV has the worst programming ever. Expect posts soon about this fact.

Day 117

2009-07-03T09:40:00.000-05:00

I hope Anberlin wasn't foreshadowing things to come in my library ways.
For today's cd's were quite awful.
Remember.
I'm trying not to judge cd's by their cover, but these two covers did provide adequate warning:

Both were awful in their own respects. I won't go into it here.
But let's just say the covers were a warning.
They were a warning.

Today was spent trying to train Rice how to get in and out of a car a little better. He kind of got it towards the end. We will try again tomorrow.

It also turns out that I will be able to go to a Brewers vs. Cards game, complete with tailgating!
This is exciting, as this could prove pivotal for the NL Central.

Another amazing thing happened yesterday.
Call in liquid courage, but I actually watched the entire Brewers-Cubs game last night.
Even though we were down by 7 runs in the 5th inning, I decided to not fair-weather it.
I'm not gonna lie, sometimes I get a little angry.
And while the expletives were flowing, I only took a break after Lee's grand slam (still grrr-ing about that).
And it was quite heartening to see Brewer fans in the crowd at the end of the game, down now only by four runs, which at least is a respectable number, up and cheering with their rally caps on.
And let's be real, if it were a Cubs defecit, Wrigley would have been half empty.
So thanks Brewer fans.
Thanks for staying classy, and staying at the game.

And I think this is the root of the Cubs vs. Brewer rivalry.
It's not so much that we hate the CUBS as we hate their fans.
We hate that Chicago ATTITUDE.
Chicago spends spends spends.
And we are truly blue collar--working the farm system, making smart picks now in hopes that they will pay off.
Chicago thinks they are "OWED" a series. They're the love-able losers. Curses curses curses!
Are you effing kidding me? I will allow a bad call here and there, hells, I'm still angry about the Braves-Brewers game two years ago that had seriously some of the worst umping I've ever seen.
But to blame curses? And curses not even made by real witches or warlocks! Curses made by a person trying to smuggle a goat into a baseball game, or the black cat. Or Bartman. Well that is what you get for having the world's douchey-est fans. They screw up your game for you. To quote Beyonce, "You've made your bed, now lay in it."
Whereas the Brewers only made it one game further than the Cubs in last year's playoff race, after that oh-so-disheartening loss, Brewer fans stood up and cheered, a final "Let's Go Brewers," a sort of curtain call for the season we had all waited so long for.

Day 116

2009-07-02T14:01:00.000-05:00

As you know I've been fairly lucky with my library selections:
Music I've loved, books/authors I will continue reading, movies that don't suck!

Well the streak was bound to end.
Have you heard of a band called Anberlin?
I hadn't either.
So I decided to not judge cd's by the cover (oh how I wish cd's would come with like little blurbs on the back, "If you like Blippity Bloo, you will probably like this. Their power-pop, blah blah...I would find this helpful.)
So I plop the ol' cd into the disc drive so I can listen while tooling around the interwebs.
And itunes tells me it's "Christian/Gospel."
WHAT?!?!
So I look at the lyrics, and nothing seems over Jesus vs. Satan, or filled with holy love.
So I think, well I will just give it a listen anyway.
Because I do love me some old school MWS and Amy Grant.
But instead it was that awful, like, Fall-Out Boy, icky nasal voices, fake punk/pop crap.
So I didn't hate it cos it was Christian.
But because it was bad.

I stayed on track (pun totally intended) and went for a run today.
It wasn't easy.
But I got through it.
I'm thinking of upping my run portion to 5 songs, rather than just four.
But I don't know.
I just don't know.

After the subsequent shower, we traveled down to Waterford to see my mom who was visiting my aunt.
I also got to see my "sister" Mya.
Mya is a dog.
And was procured after my brother and I had moved out, but before the divorce.
Pops generally has custody of Mya, but Mader was watching her this week while D was out in Colorado working for my uncle's catering company.
Adult Child of Divorce.
Maybe that could be the name of a new blog.
Or at least a band.

Foster news:
It appears my foster dog, Rice, will be adopted this weekend.
We knew he was just a short termer, but he is so good, and he's starting to act goofy with us.
We will miss him, but think that his new life on the road will be enjoyable and that his new mom will be very lucky!

Day 115

2009-07-02T12:53:00.000-05:00

I would like to comment on paper applications.
While I DO think the "writer" job at Food Company P would be fun, it's frustrating that I have to fill out a four page application, send a cover letter, a resume, and samples.

Frustrating because if this goes the way of any other paper application job, I will not even receive a phone call.

So I've expended all this energy making sure I don't make any mistakes, making sure my handwriting is legible, etc. It's just frustrating.
It takes alot out of me.
But at least I know I've applied for all the writer-ly jobs out there.

In other news.
I recently checked out Season One of the Sarah Silverman Program.
And it's really freaking funny.
I don't know if you've ever seen it. I don't think it's on anymore, but eff.
E and I were both cracking up.
Here's a quote:
"And I wish the retarded... were re-smarted / That's what I wish. "
PERFECT!
And all thanks to the library.
Good ol' libes.

And the Crew won, securing a series win vs. the Mets.
Tomorrow: day game with Gallardo pitching.
It will most likely be low scoring because whenever Gallardo pitches, we cannot, for the life of us manufacture runs.
But you never know.
The boys have kept swinging recently.

Things have just been incredibly boring here.
I've been reading.
Watching mostly bad television and movies.
Oh yes.
Something I would like to comment on:

Anna Faris.
As some of you know, pre-recession I subsribed to various magazines including Bust, Bitch, Martha Stewart and the Advocate. I can only imagine what our USPS-er though.
Although I can't find it (figures) I swear I read an article in Bust (or maybe a website somewhere?) that was like in love with Anna Faris.
And I couldn't really figure it out.
She plays the same role in everything she's in:
The Ditzy Blonde, and not ditzy like Resse Witherspoon in the Legally Blonde series or Cher in Clueless who might have superficial tastes but are smart.
She plays truly pretty but dumb characters.
Using her sex to get whatever she needs.
And I can't imagine why people are embracing her as this like new kind of funny-it girl.
Really?
So while I didn't have high hopes for "The House Bunny" I thought maybe it would be better than I expected.
Usually the lowest of the low expectation result in "Meh."
This time however, my lowest expectations were met.
It was actually worse than I expected.
What's even worse is that this was written by women.
Boozoes.
And the same ones who wrote Legally Blonde in 2001.
How does that happen?
I'm not saying Legally Blonde is the greatest feminist film of all time, but for how popular it was, I thought it sent a pertinent, but also fun message to all the girly girls out there. You can be pretty and girly and not have to dumb yourself down.
And this is an actual issue in today's educational system. Girls' math and science scores drop dramatically when they hit puberty. Because it's not cute to be smart.
And it's not like this ends after Jr. High.
Which is apparently the point this movie is making.
Hopefully you can be cute, because no one likes smart non-slutty-dressing girls.

So I thought the House Bunny might be similar, with Faris' Shelley, teaching the misfit girls' to use their strenghs to advance their cause (in this case their sorority).
But instead there is a shopping/makeover monatage and all they use is their sexuality to get what they want.
And.
Even if I'm overlooking this fact, (the lack of story, or how I don't like the story)--it just wasn't funny at all. And people were comparing her to Lucille Ball and Goldie Hawn? Is this a joke?

Day 114

2009-07-01T11:13:00.000-05:00

That's the sound of the man.
Working on the chain.
Gay-eee-ang.

False.
That clickety clackety you hear is the sound of me sending out e-rezzies/apps to every company known to mankind.

On the one hand I should be thankful that there are actually jobs in my field to apply to.
On the other hand, I will probably just be up against the same 500 applicants that I "beat out" for the job I didn't get at Company Z.

K Publishing is looking for a copywriter. Resume emailed.

C Ad Agency is looking for a part-time copywriter. Resume emailed.

D Ad agency is looking for a Marketing Communications person. Resume emailed.

P Food Company is looking for a writer.
Application pages 1-3 downloaded and printed but then printing paper ran out.
This is my life.
Eff my life.

I guess this isn't the slew of jobs I had claimed, but I do have to search through about 7 different jobber sites hoping something will catch my eye, and/or I will be qualified for.
This is how my Mondays are spent now.
Slogging thru job websites looking for SOMETHING that I won't hate and am qualified for.
Boozoes.

The good news is that I started my running back up today.
And while it was a bit of a killer, I definitely feel better after I do it.
And.
Dare I say it?
I think, THINK it might actually be helping me fit into my jeans better.
I will keep you posted.
Who needs a gym when you got legs?
Eh?
Full disclosure:
I still miss the gym.
But re-joining is way down on the list of things to happen whence I get a job.

Onto other news:
The BREWERS!
Are winning.
And thus, I'm a happy person.

I watched a horrible movie starring Bruce Willis and Halle Berry, "A Perfect Stranger."
I've decided that while attractive, I don't think Halle Berry is a good actress.
At least she wasn't in this film.
Or it was written so poorly it didn't matter, but everyone else was manageable.
So I'm thinking it's her acting skills.
And why does she pick such awful films?
But.
Maybe this one would have been better had she acted better.
One of those chicken/egg quandries, I suppose.

Day 113

2009-07-01T10:34:00.000-05:00

BASEBALL STUFF!!!

Due to the fact that my foster dog forces me to wake up early every day, I had time to watch yesterday's game, which was pretty awesome.

Upon finishing that game, I settled on the couch for the live game.
Jason Kendall bobble head.
Which I should have known would prove to be a loss, as it seems they always seem to do poorly on bobble head days.
Plus I'm surprised Jason Kendall even agreed to do a bobble head. I don't think I've ever seen that guy smile.
Even when he does a good job, he's always super serious.
Which I kind of like.
Total gamer, that guy.

Anyway, we had two phone calls asking me whether we were going to the game.
Whlie I think all fan give-aways are a great way to attract crowds, as they are almost always sell-outs.
I really don't like going to those games. Plus let's be real. We are super broke.
1. It's always amateur hour. Especially with day games. So you have people who don't know anything about baseball talking smack. Which is annoying.
2. Super crowded. Which means: lines for bathrooms, lines for food/drink (although E and I have started to bring our own food/drink), and lines make it harder to navigate the concourse
3. Almost inevitable, someone tries to start the wave. Which is annoying, and I hate it. If you find a baseball game so boring that you have to do something that decidedly takes away from other spectators viewing said sport, you should not go to the game.

So I watched the game in the comfort of my own home, where I listen to people who are knowledgeable about the sport make comments, that make me feel smarter because I said them moments before, or I whole-heartedly agree.

Needless to say it was not a game to remember. It was a shut out and I took a nap during inning 2-7. Not like I missed much.

After my nap, I had dinner on the brain and we decided on stuffed zucchini, which was super duper delicious and fairly easy to make. I hope we get more zucchini in our next farm share, as I would love to make it again. The recipe came from the 1952 Better Homes and Gardens cookbook, that JT got me a while back from the antique store:

The recipe is as follows:
Pre-heat oven to 350F

6 med. zucchini (we used three)
3 c. bread crumbs (we used 1 1/2 c.)
1/2 c. grated parmesan
1 small onion chopped
3 tbsp. parsley (I used a combo of oregeno, rosemary and thyme, but thought the thyme and rosemary were over-powering)
1 tsp salt
dash pepper
2 eggs, beaten
2 tbsp butter

Wash zucchini, cut off ends; don't pare. Cook in boiling, salted water for 5 minutes.
Halve lengthwise; remove pulp with spoon; combine with bread crumbs, cheese, onion, parsley, salt, pepper and eggs.
Fill zucchini shells; dot with butter; sprinkle with more cheese.
Bake for 30 minutes.

Day 112

2009-07-01T10:07:00.000-05:00

Saturday!
In the park!
I think it was the fourth of July!

Just kidding.
But it is saturday.
And while we didn't hang out in a park.
We did get to hang out with a lot of our besties today.
And by alot I mean three:
PO
and
M&Z

M&Z hosted a bbq at their house and as asian slaw is probably some of the greatest recession food ever, I ran to the market to pick up a couple ingredients, plus some juice so I could make adequate hooch to bring to the party.

And I would like to comment at how much I hate Pick-N-Save.
1. I can find nothing there.
2. How do they NEVER have enough checkers?
3. You still have to use one of those swipey savings card things. LAME.

I totally prefer Sentry, at least the Sentry that is by our house.
And by our house, I mean in 'Tosa.

M&Z had said I could bring a friend, and PO and I had previously made plans to watch True Blood that evening anyway. The advent of M&Z's bbq just meant we could start drinking earlier without seeming like alcoholics.

It was a funfun time at the bbq, booze, hookah, fun peeps, PO actually played with a child, and let's call a spade a spade here.
She was really freaking good with Kai.
I'm nowhere near as good with children as she is.
TRUEZOES!

After most people left, the rain started to come down and we headed in for a game of Settlers of Catan.
Which is really fun.
Well, at least 4 of the five people there thought it was really fun.
PO didn't think it was.
But after the game was over, realized that maybe it was because she hadn't played before.
And I'm sure having four people who had been drinking since 3 try to explain a strategy game to you, isn't the easiest way to learn.

We headed back to our house, E disappeared into sleeptown, and PO and I watched the first two episodes of True Blood, good times on the bayou, indeed.

I then drove PO home and realized that I really can't eat veggie burgers whilst drinking.

I checked the Brewer score and saw that it was a game to remember (walk-off hits are always a good time, plus secured the series win!) and fell asleep with a smile on my face.

Day 111

2009-06-30T19:44:00.000-05:00

While I would love to say that today was filled with awesomeness and unicorns.
It wasn't.
I mean.
Don't get me wrong, it was a pretty good day.
Despite submitting my UI claim three days late, it still came on time.
Which, at this point, really just means the bills can continue getting paid.
Is this depressing?
Kind of.
But that is what the recession does to you, folks.

Another thing it does is make you prioritize what you really NEED.
For instance:
E gets weekly tips from his job.
Usually, providing we didn't go crazy the week before, we use his tips to buy groceries.
And since we get a weekly farm share, most of our groceries are super basics like cheese, eggs, and dry goods (rice, pasta, flours, etc.)
And one of the things we have deemed "appropriate" to buy is alcohol.
E usually gets a twelve pack of beer, I usually get a bottle of wine, one could argue that I should be drinking boxed wine, but I always pick a bottle out of the clearance cart.
If we ever get in the black again, I will continue my bulk wine purchasing ways and buy bottles from Trader Joe's. Cos the white really wasn't that bad at all.

In other news.
I had a delicious breakfast of home-made strawberry shortcake.
Although I totally dicked up the biscuit portion, they were still edible.
I also acidentally spilled too much vanilla into the whipped cream, so that was a little too "cool whip" tasting for me.
And I hate cool whip.
But all in all, for my first time making it.
I thought I did an alright job.
Not EVERYTHING I make can be awesome and perfect.
I mean.
Most of it is, but...

Day 110

2009-06-27T08:29:00.000-05:00

The majority of today was spent catching up on the ol' blog-a-roo.
Unfortuantely the past 10 days or so have been quite busy and quite hot that I can't quite get myself to sit in the office for any amount of time longer than checking email. I do dreadfull apologize, and I have since found a box fan that fits nicely in the office window, which blows in the shaded (read: cool) air. The room is actually quite lovely and cool now, competing with the downstairs as coolest room in the house.

And while I did blog for a while, I have to say, I could have kept going, had I more days to discuss. Maybe I really am good at this writing thing.
Who knew?!

Recession garden news:
It looks as if the vinegar trick really worked!
One we pull out the dead weeds, we then salt the patio and water the salt in.
This combination makes the patio inhabitable for plants, supposedly.
So not only is this trick "green" but also costs less than a bottle of Roundup!
I will keep you posted how it works.

Feeling the Recession:
While thus far I haven't exactly, hardcore, "felt" the recession, I am feeling it this week.
Today begins Summerfest.
And while most of my friends hate hate HATE Summerfest, I always have fun when I go.
Where else can you see Tom Petty for free from the grass seats?
Or the Foo Fighters on one of the side stages?
Sure it's full of drunken fools, but what bar isn't that time of night?
PLUS!
You're hearing good, live music.

So anyway, it appears as if I won't be able to go this year.
Which is truly unfortunate because a couple of my friends' bands are playing and I like to support good local music.
Okay.
I like to support my friends.
Whatevs.
And I can't seem to score free tickets for the life of me.
So I would just like to give my support here:
Good luck bands.
I hope you draw big crowds, and that people stop and listen to your music.

Day 109

2009-06-26T14:27:00.000-05:00

For whatever reason I was up early today.
Since no heat advisory was in effect, yet, E and I decided to try to finish weeding/tending the garden. But let's be real. It was still hot out, and many water breaks were to be had.

I would also like to give E some major props for going along with my plan to keep the yard chemical free.
No chemicals=safe for dogs, safe for kids, safe for earth, safe for you!
This is no easy task in our yard as our brick patio, thanks to all the rain, is covered with weeds, as is the grass (I, unlike my diligent friend MG, didn't dig up all the dandelions before they re-seeded, so we have quite a few weeds within the lawn, but our main concern presently is the patio.

So E has been doing research online to see what will kill weeds organically.
Boiling water has worked, as he tried this the other day, but we can't reasonably boil and transport that much water.

He also found that vinegar will kill weeds, so he sprayed vinegar on all the weeds on the patio and along the alley, and while it smelled bad, it did enable us to let the dogs hang out with us outside and both of them had a water party with their water bowl, especially Rice.

After spraying the weeds, he helped me out by digging a trench for the flower bed, which I then helped him fill with the pavers/bricks that have been lying around since we bought the house.
When you're living through a recession you've got to be thrifty and use whatchoo got! I actually think it looks super great, E did a fabulous job, and I'm not terribly embarrassed by our yard anymore. True, it's a little bare, as my flowers from seeds didn't take as well as I had hoped, this is just something to think of and budget for next year.

BUT!
My tomato plants look quite good, no flowers on them yet, but there is something growing on one of them...a flower? the first tom of the season? Don't know yet, I will keep you posted. It's times like this I wish I had a digital camera that was worth it's weight in batteries, but sadly, mine is grainy and a battery-sucker.
My tomatillos look as if they have wee little fruits developing! Which I'm very excited about and my broccoli/cauliflower (I ran out of labels!) is looking fairly healthy.

In other news:
I would like to comment on all the debauchery that has been going on in the political sphere lately.
Mostly all this brou-ha-ha over the extra-marital affairs.
1. This wouldn't matter NEARLY as much if your political party didn't espouse puritanical values.
2. Does this really effect the way said person governs? Quite frankly, I think we all know people who have cheated on a partner, hells maybe that is YOUR deep dark secret. Should this mean they have to resign from your job? Or call into question your integrity at said job? And especially in a nation where monogamy rates are below 50%. Is this really a shocker?
3. There was a female correspondent on CNN or MSNBC, who was saying we wouldn't have all of these affairs if more women were in politics. Which I thought was ridiculous. Are these male politicians just have sex with other males? Are you trying to tell me that when you are having an affair you don't know whether the other person is taken? Really? It didn't make sense to me. I don't think women are "purer" by nature or more monogomous, unless, as previously stated all the affairs are homosexual affairs.

In other news:
Way to go TMZ.com for reporting hours before everyone else that Michael Jackson had died.
You were right, and you made my fb statuf updates true.
I am actually more upset about Farrah Fawcett, because she suffered through horrible cancer, and kind of seemed like a nice person at the end. I don't know.
Plus she was nowhere near as creepy as Michael.
I hope Paul McCartney can get his songs back now.

I would also like to take this time to discuss a topic that has recently been brought to my attention.
That of the awkward, extended phone call.
Due to my continuous job search, I'm often forced to answer phone calls I would otherwise ignore, or answer the phone when an unfamiliar number appears.
This was the case yesterday.
A vaguely familiar number popped up on our caller id, I thought it might have been a neighbor, or maybe one of my old L's cohorts, as I don't have their numbers memorized.
Instead it went like this:
Jj: Hello?
JW: Jj?
[at this point I realize it's a dude, so I assume it's ZG, our CSP buddy, but it sounds nothing like him]
Jj: Yes?
JW: It's J.
[in all honesty I think to myself, this can't be my brother, why would be calling from a 414 number? Then I realize it's one of E's film colleagues]
Jj: Oh. Sure. Hi.
JW: Hi. How are you?
Jj: Um, alright.
JW: Just alright, huh?
Jj: Yep (sigh) How are you?
JW: Pretty good, pretty good.
Jj: Well that is good.
JW: So what are you doing right now?
[at this point I realize I am in for a treat of the awkward, endless phone call]
Jj: What?
JW: What are you doing. Right now.
Jj: Um, I'm watching a movie [which is now on pause because this phone call is never going to end] and folding laundry.

We then get into a discussion about what movie I'm watching, how he only really does commercial work, David Lynch (??), and FINALLY he asks if Erin is there.
I tell him no, but I would definitely give him the message that he called and have him call him directly.
Of course this wasn't enough information and he asks me about our pseudo documentary we're interested in doing, how he could help, blah blah blah.
Eventually, I said, well I will tell him you called, to which he said "Oh yeah, sorry I kept you on the phone so long--" and literally would have kept talking if I didn't say "Okay cool, talk to you later, bye.

To be fair, I've met this persona a couple of times. Most recently at the Firestarter Film Festival, where we discussed his film. He did accompany E and I to get some pizza, but that was it.

This is how I would've handled the sitch:
Jj as the caller: You?
You: Yeah?
Jj: This is Jj
You: Hi!
Jj: Hey. Hey is Potsie around?
You: Excuse.
Jj: Okay well could you ahve him call me when he gets in?
You: Sure.
Jj: Great! Thanks! Bye!
You: Bye. Ooh wait!
Jj: Yes?
You: Your blog is tops.
Jj: Aw shucks. Thanks. Bye!
You: Bye.

Okay so that blog part was just a little ego-stroking. But seriously. That is a one minute conversation at best. AT BEST. I don't even talk to E's parents that long, and I've met them and stayed with them numerous times.

E then gets home while I'm making homemade strawberry shortcake, I'm about to go into my story when he tells me how he saw Trevor Hoffman driving his truck, stuck in Milwaukee traffic.
How awesome is that! I was really excited for him, and for the fact that my whipping cream was finally starting to thicken.

I then laid into my story regarding JW and he says, "He's a talker."
Really?
Really.

If this recession is doing one thing for me, it's broadening my reading horizons.
As I've stated before I like to go in order at the library, and as I just finished regarding "Confederacy of Dunces" I decided I should move on to a non-fiction book, to get back to the old routine of fiction/non-fiction. So I am currently reading a non-fiction book about the mythos of the Priory of Sion. It's so unlike me, but thus far it's interesting and this way I will have a wee bit of knowlege about something that I knew nothing about before, well nothing that wasn't in "The DaVinci Code."

I have to say "Confederacy of Dunces" was a let-down. I kept waiting for the outrageousness that was promised by 95% of reviewers and fellow readers. I got a couple chuckles here and there, and that was it. No guffawing. No lol-ing.
In all fairness, I expected to hate the book, because it was getting such great, glowing reviews, so when I didn't hate it, I think I automatically expected to love it, which didn't happen at all. If you've read it, please let me know what you think. What parts had you rolling on the floor?

Day 108

2009-06-26T13:47:00.000-05:00

At least the car has air conditioning.
I didn't have to sweat it out on the way to my interview.
My hair did have all sorts of kink in it, though.

Company K is a behemoth.
I probably should have checked it out in person before the interview, but didn't have the time/energy. And I'm not quite sure it would have helped to begin with.

I get there with 10 minutes to spare.
Which, any place else, should have been more than enough time.
However, all of the "close" visitor spots were taken, and I could find absolutely NO PARKING anywhere in the lots.
And there were probably 10 lots.
Water water everywhere and not a drop to drink.
I finally see a lady park on the edge of a lot, so people would still be able to drive through and get out of their spots, this is my only option, and I'm hoping my car doesn't get towed.

After parking my car I have about two or seven minutes to get to the front desk (our car clock is 10-15 minutes fast depending on which radio station you're listening to or what clock tower you're looking at), this is no easy task in heels, in the blazing hot heat. But I haul it and enter the the building that is closest to me.

As luck would have it, their clock says I'm five minutes late, which is blatantly false.
I know for a fact, it did not take me 5-10 minutes to walk from my pseudo parking spot to the first building.

So I tell the receptionist, who is wearing really garish make-up, that I have a nine o'clock with a Ms. P. She looks at me blankly and then I say "AP" which is the name I was told by the employment agency that set up this interview. Besides the initial blank stare, she is helpful, and calls around to see what is up.

I sign in on a computer and it prints out a sticker nametag, which I think is rather lovely, and she tells me I have to go to the next building, and that I'm meeting with K.

So I'm looking like a complete jack-ass at this moment.

So I walk to the next building and tell the receptionist there I have an interview with K, and that they just sent me over from the other building. She seems to have the same blank stare the other girl had so I explain myself again, and she says, "So they know you're here?" To which I reply, "I guess?"

There was another girl waiting there in a dark business suit, and for a second I thought I was under-dressed. I just think business suits are totally lame, and so not me, so why try to promote myself as some weirdo corporate type when that is clearly who I am not? So I was in my "interview outfit" that I think is delightful and professional. Just like me.

I don't have to wait long, probably because they were expecting me, but K is extremely nice, and apologizes for the building mis-hap, and I make a comment on the parking zoo, and I feel at ease.
Plus she's in jeans. So I no longer felt under-dressed.

She asks me the basic questions, then sends in D who would be a peer of mine (she is currently an editor there) and then the infamous AP comes in and I meet with her. I thought the interviews themselves went rather well. I think I answered the questions properly, the job sounds like it would be a good fit, even if it is just for eight weeks.

Could this recession be getting a break?! Only time will tell.
And don't you worry, since temping is obviously a direct desendent of poor times, this blog will keep going.

Upon returning to the oven that is my home, I changed out of interview outfit, to keep it as fresh as possible without having to dry clean it, and hung out in my room.
The only room in our house with an air conditioner.

That night we had a brewer game, and as E and I were getting in the car two of our alley neighbors were in the alley picking up the garbage cans that keep getting knocked over by hoodlums.
We currently have three garbage cans, and I have no idea how we've acquired this many. You are supposed to have one per dwelling, so if you own a duplex you get two. But somehow we have three, the single family next door has two, the psuedo vacant house has a couple (at least) and I think even the vacant house as one. And all of our recycling bins are gone.

Neighbor #1 says that his car was just stolen and asked if we saw anything. We told him we didn't, and then Neighbor #2 said his window was broken, but we didn't hear that either.
Seriously, with the heat we spend as much time in our bedroom as possible without getting bedsores.

So I made a comment about how, luckily, we've not had any issues since we started parking our car in the back, on our slab (there are no garages on the alley). And Neighbor #2 said we wouldn't have any more problems ever since he chased away the would-be burglar, that incidentally enough, I just referenced a couple blogs ago.

He then tells us that he had to be careful so he wouldn't get in trouble because when he saw him breaking our window he ran outside with his gun and then fired it in the air, but the police couldn't know about that.
E and I just kind of stand there like, "Oh, right." What does one say to that?
Then the other guy was like "I would'a just popped him. I wouldn'a shot in the air, I woulda just popped him"
WTF???? And these are like good neighbors, not ghetto, friendly, family-oriented people.
Jesus Aitch.
E and I then say, something to the effect of "Well we'll see you later, hope we get our recycling bins back!"
Because we are the whitest people we know.
So now our favorite thing to say (in the comfort of our own home, mind you) is "I woulda just popped him."
I guess we're thankful they are on our side?
Meh?

Day 107--pre-recession blog inside!

2009-06-26T12:49:00.000-05:00

Let's see.
It's a scorcher.
There really is no other way to put it.
If you don't believe me there was a heat advisory today.
But since I am a brave soul, I braved the heat (it's not so much the heat, but the humidity--whoever came up with this is ridick) and worked in the garden.
For two hours.
And that is when I learned, my ankles could sweat.
For they were sweating.
Water was dripping from my nose constantly, hindering my work.

I did get about half of my bed weeded, and helped E spread the gravel on our slab.
And then we called it quits.
Sweaty ankles and all.

The rest of the day is spent sweating.
What more can I say?

Because this is probably the world's shortest blog, I've included yet another "vintage pre-recession" blog, written this very same week last year...

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

I Don’t Know Nothin’ ’bout Nothin’
Current mood: awake
Category: Parties and Nightlife

So it was a pretty typical night at L's.

And by typical I mean completely bonkers.
Mamby pamby if you will.
Which was a term I actually used on Saturday night.
Whilst playing bar dice.

Pre party at JW's complete with JC, vodka and tonic for JJ, Pacifico for PO, and pizza rolls for Jj.

I was the designated driver.

JJ and PO proceed to get pretty tipsy at JW's.
I eat hummus (daintily, not by the handfuls, that is a winterfest-only activity) and bugles and pizza rolls.

Have Bugles, Will Travel.
We head to L's.

COMPLETELY dead.

We sit at the bar.
JJ learns alot about UFC, and places bets on the fighters (???).
We freak J out (at first) but by the end of the night he likes our company.
Or so he says.

JW makes friends and gets a shot from the drunkest or most retarded person ever. None of us could tell.

We decide we should learn how to play bar dice, sitting at the bar and all.
So we do.

Shots for the drunk ensue.
Shots shots shots.

JJ, PO, and I not so subtle-y check out J's ass.

We play Jenga, which turns into retard-Jenga (that is from winterfest!!!)

PO argues with someone who keeps referring to JJ as the nice one, PO the mean one. I had no label as I don't think I was drunk enough to par-take in the snap-judgement game.

JW goes home with his cutey-pie (FINALLY!!!) gf.
We continue to sit at the bar which shocks and awes the regular bar-sitting patrons.

I get blamed for the Janesville GM plant closing, when it was clearly PO's doing.

PO gets a glance from J/B and then an awkward hi.
I think if he could not be such a huge girl about it, *something* could happen.
Or at least we'd have something to blog about.

The car ride home reeks of booze with JJ passed out in the back, and PO singing in a falsetto voice (a falsetto child?) to music that isn't even on the radio.

I get home and promptly throw up because as my reward for being the good DD and staying sober, God gives me a migraine, which then incapacitates me all of Sunday.

In other news:
I will be venturing to California where the interweb may be sparse.
But barring any catastrophes I shall return with blogs galore and maybe pix too.
Maybe.

Lovezos.

Day 106--classic blog included!

2009-06-26T11:47:00.000-05:00

Today E and I worked on keeping the house some semblance of clean.
And by clean I mean straightened.
Nothing thrilling.

We went to Company K to get E some new tennis shoes, so I could pick up an ad (part of the interview is writing copy, so I needed to look at their style), and decided the rest of the day should be spent in air conditioning if at all possible.

We took a jaunt to superduper home improvement store to pick up some gardening supplies that were still needed, a hoe which had never been replaced from the attempted break-in a while ago.
An account of that can be read here, originally posted on my myspace page on the below date:

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Stupid Ghetto Thugs
Current mood: annoyed
Category: Automotive

Yeah, that's right. An automotive blog.
Take that.

So it doesn't bother me so much when vandalism/attempted break ins happen. That is all part of an "up and coming" neighborhood. But when there is no point to the breakins.

Well, I guess that is what I don't understand.

First we get the crazy drunk who breaks the window of our back hall with my garden tools.
Seriously. Then he tries to open the back door, again with my garden tools.

Really? You're so bad at being a drunken hoodlum that you can't even use your own tools to break in? And break into my back hall? What? Are you going to fit my washer and dryer thru the window? Cos I got a fiver that says that ain't happenin'. Of course, I took geometry and understand how shapes work.

Oh and I forgot, the reason we knew he was drunk was because the back hall stunk to high heaven like cheap cheap booze. That is way past 4 chocky martini drunk. that is like perma-drunk. Forills.

So that was a while ago, and I got over it pretty quickly, although I will have to get a new hoe and rake since that jerk face bent mine all to hell.

Then today Erin picks me up from work and the driver side back window is broken/smashed. But oh, if that were it. It's not even the BIG window, the one you can roll down, it's the little triangle window. The one that even if you DO break it, you can't reach the lock.

WHAT?!?! I mean what's the point of breaking a window if you're not trying to steal something. Not like the dill weeds would want our Johnny Cash cds or Patty's Rock Mix or Afterbar Glory.

The plus side is, is that out neighbor told us that our car was fine this morning when he was shoveling, which we knew, but it's nice that our nieghbors are somewhat cool.

So now we gotta shell out the bux to fix the stupid window taht serves no purpose anyway. I think back in the day it would have been a cigarette window, ya'll know what i'm talking about.

Sheeit.

I suppose I should say that I myself am an old pro at breaking into houses. But I never broke anything, mostly just took tapes. yeah. Cassette tapes and looked around at stuff. I was a very intellectual breaker inner. Of course I haven't done this in like 10 years, but still...

IN OTHER NEWS:
WILL work on the screen play tonight. I've just got to.

DEAN got adopted!:) By his newer foster family. That really makes me happy.

I made REALLY good fake chicken noodle soup last night. Why oh why are kluski noodles so AWESOME???? Seriously, they are the Beatles of noodles. Any polacks out there? Gimme a hell yeah!

I think I am also going to paint my nails tonight, like a real live girl.

So kids, on this most Holy of days, St. Valentine's, I wish all of you LOVE and smart thugs.

I hope you all enjoyed that blast from the past. I've decided I might start posting "classic" blogs, as I don't use myspace too much, and I had some funny shit going down back in the days of having jobs. We'll see. I should probably concentrate on keeping this one up to date.

After the hoe purchase we trekked off to the libes, as "Confederacy of Dunces" is coming to an end and I don't like to have gaps in reading. Sure I have books here that need to be read, but I like to alternate between owned/borrowed books and books from the library.

Upon returning home from the libes we found the house to be extremely warm. E had the brills idea of taking in a movie, as we actually have some gift cards that need to be used. He decided on "The Hangover" because we had heard it was funny, it was one of the movies that fit into our time slot, and there was air conditioning, and the library isn't open 24 hours.

In all honesty, I wasn't expecting much.
Which could be why I found the movie to be really funny.
And afterwards, E and I couldn't exactly decide what was so funny, but we were literally cracking up.
One of my favorite parts was the Lone Wolf speech by the future brother in law.
I couldn't stop giggling.
or
"I didn't know they give out rings at the Holocaust."
And let's be real.
It's totally crude, but hilarious.
Sure there were some gay jokes I didn't think were necessary, but barring that, funny stuff.
Well done, mainstream Hollywood.

Day 105

2009-06-26T11:20:00.000-05:00

Considering I was up for 21 hours the day before, I decided to take it upon myself to sleep in.
It's not always an easy task with the dog telling you she needs to go out or eat or is just wishing you good morning, but I pulled thru.

I spent the first part of the day reading upon my sittee, because I am classy like that, and that it's about 5 degrees cooler downstairs than it is upstairs. Between chapters I would doze in and out, until it was time for me to go pick up my new foster dog, Rice.

Who, upon picking up, is covered in poo.
Not his poo, but poo just the same.
His leash, his paws.
Grossoes.
Luckily, I have some old shirts in the car and try to get the shit (literally!) off his paws.
His leash is thrown in the trunk so I don't have to smell it, and a new leash is put on him.
Sick guts.

Upon entering the house, I call to E that he needs a bath; the other dogs are kenneled (I should note, when I say kenneled, I don't mean we have dog kennels in our house. I just mean they are either in their crate or in our room. "Kennel up" is a term a lot of kennels use to get the greys to get back in their kennels, so we still use that when referencing their crate, or our room).

E and I proceed to bathe Rice, who does okay, although we do get soaked in the process.
An inaugural walk after is bath dries him off nicely and he gets to meet the neighborhood kids who promptly ask:
"Why he bald?"
"What?"
"Why he bald?" Then they point and I see they're pointing at his butt.
Greyhounds do have a tendency to have bald butts. No one really knows why, but Rice is one such greyhound.
I shrug my shoulders, "Well you know how some people are bald? Some greyhounds have bald butts, it's just the way it is."
Which I have to say is a really good answer. By the time these kids grow up they will have vast greyhound knowlege.
Maybe Cold Spring Park is breeding future vets of America, for the kids that are brave enough to "rub" the dogs.
By the by, in urban speak, rub=pet.
And E and I being the classist bourgeoisie that we are, always correct them, "Yes, you can pet them."

Day 104

2009-06-26T11:02:00.001-05:00

Today was the grad party.
Good times.
The usual food.
The veggie pizza I made was incredibly salty thanks to the stupid ranch dressing mix I bought.
GROSS!
And it wasn't even brought out until we were about to leave.
Which was okay, as it cost like $10 to make, and I wanted to take it home even if you needed to drink a gallon of water with it.

After a day in the sun, playing bags, talking to relatives, pseudo planning a bridal shower for another cousin, EW, E and I had to head home.

I had a ladies night planned.
Usually I would say girls' night.
But as one is a new mom, that makes her a lady.
So the crew got together at had a delicious dinner at Byron's which is on the river.
If you haven't been there, I highly reccommend it.
While the patio was pretty busy, the inside of the restaurant was fairly dead.
Drinks are reasonable, decent veggie fare, and they have a great patio.
After a bit of a snafu of the bill, nothing major, (a drink was left on, my meal was left off, some confusion of my drinks), we all got buy one, get one drink cards! SWEET!
Needless to say we would head back there anyway, but that sealed the deal.
Another plus?
There was absolutely no confusion over the bill.
Everyone put in what they owed, with tip.
And once added up?
PERFECTO!
T'was great.
Bad?
There was a larger group of what appeared to be multiple families who were letting their effing kids run around.
LITERALLY RUNNING on the patio.
With waitresses carrying glassware non-stop.
And as it was busy, the patio was full.
I was super close to saying something, but we were ending our time there shortly.
I'm fine with children, but if you can't find a sitter for your night out boozing with friends, then maybe you should have a bbq at home.
Or control your god-damn kids.
Is this harsh?
Probably, but if I ever acted like that in a restaurant, that would be the end of it.
The end of going out to eat, and quite possibly, my life.

While we didn't booze it up as much as I would have liked, it was an early night for those who don't consider themselves locked-in ladies (ladies who get themselves locked into bars after closing--enabling them to keep drinking and commiserating); BP, the mom, was tired, I think she was just trying to be nice when she told me she had a small buzz. JL & SN had spent the day in the sun, and JL had to leave early the next day for market in NY. AA, trooper that she is decided to continue on, after we dropped off BP, to L's.
Our favorite watering hole.
While it was fairly crowded, and AA literally left the second she took a sip of her soda (understandably so, as there was a long story or RH, her bf, sleeping already...) PO and I had some really ridick/awesome conversation about college, dogs, comic book movies, feminism and Christian Bale.

A pretty typical night, I suppose.

Day 103

2009-06-26T09:52:00.001-05:00

Tomorrow is my cousin's graduation party.
HS graduation, which I'm a little ambivalent about.
I do have a sordid history with this so bear with me.

The year was 1998.
I was a senior in high school, but being the over achiever that I was, I actually graduated in January. College wasn't going to pay for itself, and I had a job that, thankfully, was willing to give me extra hours so I could save up. It seemed more economical to work rather than stay in school, for what...the memories? False.
I worked with most of my friends anyway, and I ran with an older crowd, so I was kind of done with the whole HS experience.

Since I technically graduated in January, I thought I could skip the whole walking-across-the-stage thing.
While I didn't HATE high school, I didn't LOVE it. It was my means for going to college, which I did love.
But then my mom, in a weird maternal moment, states that I have to walk across the stage, because while I'm living there, I follow their rules (seriously? You're exercising that rule NOW?!?). So I had to fork over money for a gown, which I wasn't happy about.
And SINCE I was forced to walk across said stage, I assumed I would get to take part in the grad party tradition that all of my friends were having.
I had heard the tales: people getting enough money to pay for their books their freshman year; getting a car, maybe a trip to like Mexico or Florida.
I broached the topic with my mom and quite realistically she said, "Why should you have a party? What is there to celebrate? You finished High School. We'll throw you a party when you finish college. People up here [rural Wisconsin] don't go to college so high school is a big deal."

While I do agree with most of that statement, I was still extraordinarily jealous of my college-bound friends who got cash-money, or at least some good presents.

In all fairness my family did have some type of family picnic which I guess could have doubled for a grad party, as I think there might have been a cake that said "Congrats." But I could be conjuring the cake up. I do know this. I got some "presents." And I use this term incredibly loosely:
1. used tape deck, like that could hold 100 cassette tapes.
Used.
Cassette tapes.
In 1998.
2. economy sized box of tampons.
Okay, to be honest, helpful, but seriously? As a present?
3. card with $5 in it.

Those were three separate gifts people, from three separate relatives.
Truezoes.

In all honesty, my parents weren't totally cruel. In fact, I would venture to guess that my parents were the coolest, much like Dr. LeFeber.
Case in point:
My friend LN and I wanted desperately to take a road trip to Cleveland.
I know, totally dorky, but the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame was there and we are rock nerds.
So I had been trying to convince my parents to let us go and they had said no, but FINALLY said they would drive us if we would pay for gas. This seemed like a pretty sweet deal and we agreed to it.
After an amazing trip (seriously, I still think it was one of the most fun trips I've ever taken), my parents surprised us and said we didn't have to pay for gas (we were going to pay them back over the course of the summer).
So I guess my graduation wasn't without SOME type of gift, and my bestie got in on the deal as well.

But to this day, I agree with my mom.
If high school wasn't some epic academic or social struggle for you, shouldn't it be EXPECTED that you graduate, you finish your education with the bare minimum of academic skills?

I have a friend who is the principal (or maybe asst. principal?) of an urban Milwaukee school.
She was going on and on about the EIGHTH grade graduation.
The way people were gussied, swooned over, celebrated, etc.
Upon crossing the stage, KM told the students, "Congratulations, you've completed, a grade."
Which I think is perfect.

Anyway, my cousin, EB, is one of those who LOVES high school.
Was in sports, choir, lots of friends, the whole nine.
So it wasn't a schocker that she was having a graduation party.
While I knew of this party a while ago, I have been very busy reading and blogging.
False.
I've just been incredibly lazy.
But I hadn't yet procured a gift for this party, nor had I any idea what I was going to make as it was a pseudo potluck.
So I called my aunt to ask what she still needed for college, and if I was supposed to bring something.
She called me back to tell me I had agreed to make a veggie pizza like a month ago, and asking me if I could make some mixed cds for the party.
60s.
70s.
80s.
Of course I obliged.
When one has a gift, one needs to share their gift with the world.
Unfortunately my gift is making cds.
With other people's music.
Sigh.

That evening we decided to take part in the Milwaukee film scene and head to the Alchemist Theater for a bi-monthly event produced by Firestarter Films.
It's basically a very informal film festival. People show their shorts (I believe there is a 10 minute max?) and then the audience gets to critique the film!
How had I missed this before?!
Most, if not all, films are made locally, or by local artists.
And I have to say, the quality of work was quite good.
There were some kids showing stuff they did (cute and what good parents to know about this!), some people showing old work, and then of course the reason I was there:
E's "New Day" trailer.
[sorry these are facebook links, but I couldn't find non-fb links...besides, who doesn't have a flipping fb page?]
I have to say I was a really good audience member, supporting the theater with three glasses of wine (all proceeds go to the theater!), filling out critiques for all the films, signing the poster.
It was a really good time. $5 gets you in for a good 3 hours (with breaks, due to the number of people there, they have to break the showings into groups) of film talk, short films, and supporting Milwaukee film, which I think is incredibly important. Plus the drinks are reasonable.

The trailer that links above is a bit different than the one I viewed.
I wasn't sure the original trailer gave enough of the story away, which I dictated to the director face to face. Everyone close to the film (besides E) thought that it perhaps gave too much away.
I was trying to be objective because I had read the script so I knew what the movie was about, but I don't know if the trailer did a good enough job conveying that. I think the one above, does a better job.
And to be honest, I'm sure I'm not their target audience.
But I was asked my opinion, and I gave it.

Day 102

2009-06-22T11:59:00.000-05:00

Well my love affair with the library just won't quit.
As some of you know, I'm not an orderly person.
My house is almost always a mess, always a-clutter, I'm always running late, the usual for a highly UN-type A person.

But I think as people we need some sort of order.
Since I'm not really getting that anywhere in my life I like to make lists at the start of each day.
I like to go in order at the library.
I'm currently in the A's for authors of fiction books, and in the A's for music.
While this does mean I have listened to some pretty weird albums, I never would have given a second chance, this also means that sometimes I am pleasantly surprised.

This week's surprise was Audience's "House on the Hill."
I kind of know music.
Old proggy music anyway.
And I had never heard of this band, but the second I put it on I loved it.
It was like a mix of Jethro Tull, Yes, Moody Blues, etc.
LOVED it.
So once again the libes pulls through.

Upon watching my share of "The Daily Show," I've learned that there is apparently a huge debacle taking place in regards to healthcare reform.
While I understand "The Daily Show" isn't the best place to get my news, it's the only news program I can stomach, minus listening to the BBC news on NPR in the morning.
Anyway, so while watching Jon Stewart be pithy and funny I learned that a lot of people don't want government provided healthcare.
I'm guessing these people all have insurance, and only know people who have insurance, or have unlimited resources to pay for medical care of some disease such as AIDS or cancer, or god forbid something like a birth.
All are prohibitively expensive.
Anyway, the big argument seems to be from people (and I'm not saying dems or repugs here, because I'm currently not ecstatic with the lack of support the dems are giving Obama on this issue) that how can the government run anything? Have you waited in line at the DMV? Do you want your dr. office to run like that?

First of all, where are they going to the doctor that they don't have to wait? Some fancy shmancy doc that makes house calls? It has become habit for me to call ahead to see if the doc is running on time, and even if they say yes, more often than not I still have to wait 10-15 minutes.

Second of all, the government runs lots of things that I necessarily don't want to do on my own:
take criminals off the streets (the police), put out fires (the fire dept.), take my garbage, mail my letters for a reasonaly priced 44 cents.

Third of all, I have no insurance right now (because I seriously know no one who can afford COBRA when they are not working). I would wait an hour or so if it means that I get to see a doctor. But maybe that is just me. Does it suck? Sure, but I guess it's better than dying of untreated pnuemonia.
And that's presuming the government-run healthcare will be run like the DMV, which doesn't really make sense because it's a government health plan, so it would be like instead of Aetna insurance, I have USA insurance.

I guess I just don't understand why almost every other country of stature in the world can have healthcare available to citizens and we are like "We're America! We're Awesome! But you can only have health insurance if you're working full time at selected companies."

Want to read a bit more?
CNN.com had a great article you can read here.

In other recession news:
I have an interview for the freelance job on Wednesday!
It's early in the morning (like at 9) and part of the interview is a copywriter test where they give me an object and I write copy for it.
Which is pretty similar to what I did for the job in Waukegan.
We will see.
It's just for eight weeks so it's hard to get super duper excited.
Plus I don't like to get all high on a particular job because, well, I still haven't gotten one.

Day 101--open letter to Bill Hall inside!

2009-06-18T12:30:00.000-05:00

I slept in.
Oh lordy did I sleep in.
And it wasn't like I woke up all refreshed.
Quite the contrary my friends.
My dear readers.
I woke up completely exhausted, and with my right ear clogged.

You see.
As many of you know, I have crooked ear canals.
Which means I have to get my ears professionally cleaned out every now and then because the wax can't come out the way it does with other people.
Totes gross, but c'mon.
Everyone has wax.
Not the greatest of malaises, I will admit.
But an annoying one.
Especially when one is playing the no-insurance game.
But let's be real, if having a clogged ear is the worst of it, I should be praising Allah.
So my ear was all wonky, I was exhausted, and we had a house to clean, since we totally skipped that part the day before.

After the preliminary email/facebook/gpa forum checking we settled into our routine.
E gets the upstairs, I get the downstairs, minus the kitchen as E doesn't like the way I load our dishwasher.
This isn't a lie.
Much like he doesn't like how I clean the bathroom so he does it.
Hey.
No skin off my astrabula.
You wanna do it?
Go to town.

The house didn't take nearly as long as I had initially suspected.
Maybe we are getting better at not being utter, effing slobs.

E, in his super productiveness, started a loaf of bread, and after that was done, decided pizza for dinner would be a good idea, and started the bread machine for the dough.

My idea for dinner was brushcetta on the bread, and then a caprese salad.
E decided he wanted pizza too.
I thought this was a ridick amount of food, but obliged since he did make the bread and the dough for the pizza.
Since the dough was still a brewing, I decided to stick with my ever-other-day running routine and go for a run.
And by run, I should clarify that I mean jog.
There is nothing speedy about the way I run.
And it was a good one, if I do say so myself.
I got through all four of my songs, which is generally my goal, and thought maybe I could have done another one, but didn't want to push it.
If I keep this up, hopefully the pants will fit a little better.
Plus I do 100 crunches before the run and 100 after.
I have seen zero results as of yet, but I'm not giving up hope.

In other news:
I still don't get Weezer.

Dinner was, indeed, fabulous, but as previously assessed, too much food, which just meant pizza and salad as leftovers!
YUMZOES!

The night brought us baseball and reading, which seems to be our new nightly routine.
The Crew eked out an extra-innings win, no thanks to Hoffman (the reason the game went into extra innings), and JJ Hardy saved the day.
Thank GOD that he has broken his dry spell.
Even Billy Hall hit a homer.

Open letter to Billy Hall:

Dear Bill Hall,
I want to like you.
I like the way you play defense at 3rd (well I like it better than Gamel).
I understand that you have confidence issues, and I can't really understand that.
I'm happy that you seem to not be striking out on low and away pitches as much as you were last year.
But here's the thing:
You hit a homer last night, which is great!
Good job! Lord knows we need all the runs we can get versus the Indians.
But it wasn't a no-doubter, maybe off the bat it felt like one, but it barely made it over the fence.
And rather than running it out, you kind of just dropped your bat and watched it go out.
I don't like this behavior from anyone, really, unless you were previously beaned by the pitcher, or it's some major grudge match.
Or maybe you're batting .300 (i.e. Ryan Braun, but even most of the time he just jogs it out).
But even then it's iffy sportsmanship at best.
It's not like you were "owed" a homer.
It's not like you were even getting hard-hit outs like JJ Hardy (who by the way, didn't start "jogging" until he rounded 2nd).
You're barely hitting .200 (.201 to be exact).
So.
Please act a little bit more humble when something good at the plate does happen for you.
Sincerely,
Victim of the Recession

He had a 35 HR season 3 years ago, and have done little since then.
And, it appears that I am not the only one to have noticed this.
While most of the time the comments on the Brewer website are filled with fair-weather fans, or people who don't know much about the game, this lot had some good comments to make and some good discussion.
After the painful win (a dub is a dub is a dub), I finished watching "Angels in American," was happy with my pick-up of the abandonment motif, but would still like to read some articles/essays on other themes that I'm sure I'm missing. And I'm not sure how I feel about the ending, but I realize endings are hard, and I can't understand why Justin Kirk didn't get a slew of awards for his portrayal of Pryor Walter.
And I do love that name.

I then read a couple more chapters in "Confederacy of Dunces" which is just okay at this point.
I'm sure part of the problem is that it gets rave reviews from 95% of those who read it, and the other 5% hate it.
I'm in the middle.
It's not the best thing I've read, but it's certainly better than "Them" by Joyce Carol Oates.
Man, did I hate that book.

Day 100 (throws confetti, does happy dance)

2009-06-18T11:36:00.000-05:00

IT'S DAY 100 of BLOGGING!
Who's going to buy me a drink?
eh?
Eh?
EH?

As I am but a poor, weary, non-paid blogger, in celebration of my first 100 days of blogging, I decided to change up the look of the ol' blog-train, and decided to add a poll.
Welcome to the 21st century, Victim of the Recession, this blog is now interactive.
Well for the next 6 days, anyway.

Although I was out later than expected the night before, I woke up in plenty of time to research my destination, get prepped, the yuge.

The psuedo-interview seemed to go well. The only glitch was that I don't have Dreamweaver experience.
Boo.
But I tend to sell myself short on my computer skills, when in actuality, I'm not dumb, and I tend to figure things out "okay" on my own.
Or by reading instruction manuals.
Either way, I tend to figure it out, I just don't like it when I don't know the ins & outs of a particular program.
So that was the worst part of it, she didn't seem TOO concerned with that notion, and she just kind of went over the position again, and asked me a couple more in-depth questions.
Very business casual, but comfortable.
The next step? She passes my info to the account manager (remember it's a recruiting place) that works with Company K and then hopefully they will want to meet me.
And hire me.

The rest of the day was supposed to be spent cleaning, but E (and, subsequently, I) had a meeting with a friend of ours in regards to a documentary we want to shoot regarding our favorite topic: women and baseball. As luck would have it, she is a grant writer and has volunteered her services.
We met with her to give her an idea of what said film was about, our proposed budget for film, and our thoughts in general?
She brought up some great points, and gave us kudos for being so prepared (an actual company that she has just started free-lancing for was nowhere near as prepared as we were when she met with them).
It felt good to talk about a project, although we really can't do anything unless we get SOME funding, because you ain't messin' with no gold-diggers.
You are messin' with some broke-y brokes.

After the meeting we headed to our favorite recession-hangout:
The Washington Park Library.
I know it seems as if I talk about this place non-stop, but I truly can't get over it.
Books!
Music!
Movies!
What is not to love?
AND!
If they don't have the book/music/movie that you want, chances are they can get it for you.
And if they can't?
You could most likely reserve it and pick it up at the library that does have it.
You know what would make the library perfect?
If they sold alcohol.
I'm being serious.
Think:
You get a listening booth like at one of those old boutique-y record stores and you listen to your music while drinking a red.
You sit at a cube with a beer and read the latest Douglas Coupland novel.
Maybe that should be my goal.
To make a place to read/listen to music, drink, and bring your dog.
Cos that would be the trifecta.

We didn't get any books, because I'm currently reading "Confederacy of Dunces" and E had just renewed his weirdo historical fiction. It's still weird for me to see E reading, so it still makes me giggle when I think of:
1. him reading
2. what he's reading, cos I don't think we could have more opposite tastes in books.

After the libes we settled in our messy house, vowing that it would be clean the next day.

The phone rings and I see it's the company that I had interviewed with the week before, the interview I though went, NSH.
(not so hot, for those of you who don't speak Starbuck)
Guess who has some intuition?!
That is right.
The author of this blog.
(On a sidenote, author was a word I always mis-spelled as a child, and I was a really good speller.)
Apparently I was one of the finalists, out of 500 applicants, and while I came right down to the wire, I didn't get the job.
While it was a bit of an ego-boost to think that I beat out 500 (or I guess 498) applicants, close only counts in horse-shoes and hand grenades.
Or as E said, "Too bad you don't get paid for second place."
So so true.

To finish the night off I took in the Brewers game, which was a win, but not quite the slug-fest that it was the night before.
The bats have awoken which is a good thing.
We look for the sweep tomorrow.
No easy task on the road, versus an American League team.

I finished up disc one of "Angels in America" and truly feel this film/play would be worth a whole class of dissection.
I can't decide what to focus on in the film, and thus can't decide what to interpret/dissect.
Perhaps the author was doing to much? Perhaps it's a huge metaphor that I'm not grasping.
Although I'm drawn to the abandonment issues that are prevalent in the film, and feel this could be the metaphor I'm looking for.
Even if you're not a fan of the story (and the sub-title for the play is entirely correct; "A Gay Fantasia on National Themes"), the acting is superb and it's directed supremely. The music got a little old, I would have preferred a glam rock/christian rock score, but what can you do?

Day 99

2009-06-16T17:02:00.000-05:00

Recession News!
Recession News!

Upon completing my run yesterday, and after my 100 crunches (seriously, age is so not nice to ladies), I received a phone call from a potential job. I honestly had no idea what job it was in reference to, and I was still in my sweat-drenched clothes.

Fortunately for me the woman asked if it was an okay time, and since I have actually been reading about phone/live interviews, I knew it would not be looked down upon if I asked her to postpone. I told her I just got in from a run and just needed to shower and such. She scheduled the phone call for about an hour later, which at first I thought was weird, but then thought, "Nice. Might as well get the ball rolling, here."

Before hopping in the shower I logged into one of my babillion job-seeker sites to figure out exactly what this position was for.
And that is when I realized it was a freelance position, and that the woman calling me was actually a type of recruiter.
Hey, when the market is as slim as it is, you apply to everything under the sun, and sometimes you lose track, or in my case, don't really pay attention.
BUT, freelancing does seem pretty grown-up if you ask me.
Thru my awesome research skills I presume the job is for the competitor of the company that tossed me off their sinking ship.
She calls me, asks me some questions about my rezzy, tells me about the job itself (my presumption was correct, Company K being a direct competitor of BT Supercenter). But the job really does sound great, very similar to what I was doing before, and pays very similar.
The catch?
Well being a freelance position it's just for 8 weeks (covering for medical leave) and they are in a hiring freeze, while the woman told me they are really hoping the hiring freeze is lifted soon as they are all starting to feel the crunch, I'm not going to hold my breath.
But I do figure it would be a good way to get my foot in the door and maybe do some portfolio updates.
She wants to set up a face-to-face, and since she is super-efficient, or so it seems, we set up a wee-interview-type-thing for the next day at 1030.

While waiting for the phone to ring from the recruiter-esque person, PO called recruiting me for my other job...barfly.
She said the magic words of JJ and drinks and I immediately agreed as it has been FOREVER since I hung out with JJ and even longer since we've all been together in our natural setting--a bar. I do give her the caveat that I do have a pseudo interview the next day and need to be in a decent state of mind (no headache, no emesis). She concurs and the plan is set.
1030 at FF.

After the phone stopped ringing E and I had to make a run for some chow.
Dog and human chow.
Poor Super was down to her last cup of kibble, and E felt like some fancy fast food.

We get home and I settle in to watch the Brewer game.
Oh Brewers.
You had a heartbreaker yesterday, can you come back today and eke out a win?
On Major League Day?
Answer:
Yes.
Oh Lawdy yes.
And since they played the Indians, and they had a score of a football game, they even got some decent coverage on ESPN!
Shock and awe, ya'll.
Shock and awe.
The final score?
14-12, with the Brewers winning.
Down by 5 in the 7th, a run scores (I can't find out/remember who scored said run, making me think I need to keep score at home now.)
And then the 8th happens.
And we score 6.
First EVER MLB Grand Slam for Fielder.
And let's be clear:
It was a from a lefty, and it was the first pitch, and it was a no-diggity-doubter.
You knew the second it left the bat it was gone daddy gone.
It was a great game.
Sure I yelled at the tv some, I'm not a fan of being down by five twice in a game, but you gotta love a team that does give up.
And if watching a fabulous come from behind win wasn't enough, I still had a night of drinking to do!

What was supposed to be 1 or 2 turned into 3 delicious ciders and lots of girl talk.
And we were locked into a whole new bar this time.
I guess we're just really good at our jobs.

Day 98

2009-06-15T13:40:00.000-05:00

I've recently learned that some people would like there to be more economic theory in this blog, since I am claiming to be a Victim of the Recession.

I would like to address this:

Hells to the no.

1. I have never taken an econ class in my life. Actually I did, and the professor spoke such horrible English (and all of his analogies had to do with cheeseburgers) that I couldn't understand him, which forced me to drop the class.
2. I have no interest in economic theory unless it's espoused upon by some pithy character on The Daily Show or an enlightening guest on such show. Theories I do have interest in: film, feminist and queer theories.
3. I depend on E to tell me what he thinks, what other people think and then I form my own opinion. Incredibly lazy? You bet, but we do have conversations about it, which is more than probably 95% of America or Ammerrca.
4. I would hope that the someecards photo and the little description preceding the blog would give some indication that, while I suppose it's true that we're living in a recession, I don't really consider myself a victim as these blogs are mostly about me continuing my daily life...sometimes on the cheap, and always on the ridick.

And so I apologize if I've mislead or misinformed any of you.
And now back to regular broadcasting.

Today was a day of laying about.
Took in the excruciating 9th inning/Hoffman loss for the Brewers.
It appears the Crew is playing ball again. And I would prefer Hoffman to "blow a save" (although it wasn't technically a save situation, and he notoriously doesn't do PERFECT in non-save situations) now, versus an American League team, then versus a division rival.

After listening to the disappointing last at-bats for the Brewers we went and did a home visit for our greyhound group, Greyhound Pets of America, Wisconsin. It went fine, Super enjoyed the car ride, and could care less about his pet cat, so all was good.

We had planned on having one of my favorite meals of all time:
The Infamous Mozzarella Rustique sandwich ala Beans & Barley.
We make ours a little differently, but it's just as good.
Loaf of ciabatta bread
Fresh mozz (or the kind that comes in balls/logs...ha ha, I just said balls and logs)
Tomatoes
Lettuce
Then you make a sandwich out of those delicious ingredients.
And it's amazing.

Upon getting home, we had learned of an impromptu BBQ that our CSPBFFs were throwing.
So we decided to take our ingredients and head over.
After an appetizer course of mango hookah and some adult bevvies we ate a delicious salad and heated our bread on the grill.
M&M also joined us, and we enjoy their company as they are young and fun like us.
Like true adults we stayed until a decent hour (M had a test the next morning and E had to work. I had some blogging to do).

E went to bed, I watched "The Dark Knight" which I was, I hate to say, disappointed in. I felt "Batman Begins" was much better and featured a lot more Christian Bale.
Granted "The Dark Knight" also features Aaron Eckhart, whom I've recently started finding attractive, it really didn't sate my hot-dude craving.
I almost watched "American Psycho" to make up for it, but it was already 3am and I had delusions of granduer that I would wake up early to take in a run.

Ha.
Ha.

Day 97

2009-06-14T10:55:00.000-05:00

And I'm never goin' back to my old school.

Who doesn't love a little Steely Dan in the morning?
And it's the morning, kids.
Don't be fooled.
After hanging out with some of my oldest, yet still awesome friends last night, the dogs (all three of them) decided to wake me up at such an hour that I would say it's unnatural.

The day was mildly entertaining. After cashing some checks we decided to grill out as it was the first nice day we had had in a long time. We knew we had some dogs and burgs and the house but no buns.

So we decided to brave the Milwaukee Convenience Store to see if we could purchase some over-priced enriched bread product.
Except.
Apparently inner-city peeps don't eat buns.
Or bread.
Which, I have to say was disheartening.
I know I shouldn't be disheartened whenever I have an urban experience, yet I am.
I just think that if a place claims to have groceries, I would think they would have bread, milk, eggs and/or butter. I would think this would be the most basic of grocery items.
Instead, at the store on like 8th and Highland, they had rows and rows of candy, chips, soda and "juice," and one wee sections of bread that had four tiny loaves for almost $3 each.
So store #1 was a bust.
We also have a "Grocery Store" in our neighborhood, right down the street which we have never braved, although we were told that it was "nice."
I'm going to have to disagree.
The market is primarily for an Asian customer, and I would venture a guess to say Hmong customer.
The plusses?
1.People were friendly.
2. They had lots of Asian food/produce.
The minuses?
1. They had no bread of any type, much less buns.
2. The store smelled really, really bad. Like I had to get out of there.

So we headed to the nearest 'burb to buy buns and parmesean cheese.
Mission, prolonged by urban experience, accomplished.

The plan of the day was supposed to be to head to Pridefest with our friend JT, and then I would split off later to meet up with my old school (read: friends I've known the longest, but don't hang out nearly as much as I should).
But the gays were running about 2 hours late, and it really didn't make any sense for me to pay the $15 Pridefest ticket to stay for an hour.
If that.
So sadly, I told E to give my regards to JT and friends, and E did the same for our old pals and we made like a Journey song and went our separate ways.

I needed to bus it to Riverwest, and didn't like any of the options that googlemaps gave me so running about a half and hour late, I decided to just "figure it out" the way I thought would be safest and best.

Before you accuse me of being scared of bussing to weird neighborhoods, the bus had me going to 27th and Burleigh and then taking the 60 to get to Art Bar. While in the day time I would do this, I was also concerned with how I was getting home for the eveing.
I most certainly did not want to have to wait long for a bus (or god forbid miss my transfer and be stuck) on 27th and Burleigh at 1am. So I decided to take the good old 30 which I always feel comfortable on and know runs late.

As luck would have it I was also able to catch the 10 which dropped me mere blocks from my destination.

The whole thing (leaving the house/getting to the bar, including walking time) took an hour.
And while I was still late, I still beat my friends there (thank god for fellow tardy folks). I slipped my screwdriver slowly and started "A Confederacy of Dunces," which thus far has been an enjoyable read, but I am only on page 44 or so.

It was my HSBFF's birthday and she is quite close some old college friends of mine, and some other favorite people of mine E&J. Plus some extras.
And extras are always fun.

The ladies were already a bit tipsy from the bottle of champagne they split before leaving the house, and as I ate a light lunch, I was feeling no pain from my delicious screwdriver.
Well done Art Bar.
Well done.
I wish I lived closer cos that was a perfect bar to read in.
After healthy doses of nostalgia and story telling we then headed to the Tracks for some nosh and more bevvies.
While the veggie burger was delicious, I really can't eat veggie foods (dogs/burgers) while drinking.
Something happens in the tum that is not a fun time.
Nothing to the point of me spending the night in the bathroom, but I wasn't entirely comfortable the whole night either.
I think when drinking, I need to stick to fried foods, or junk food.
I'm just saying.
EL and CB joined us which was fabulous and we then headed to Foundations, which is, I would venture to guess, Milwaukee's only tiki bar.
While it was crowded, that didn't stop us from nabbing a table, then the booth, while most others enjoyed fabulous tiki tonics, I had a measly Malibu and pineapple and then a water.
The ol' tum wasn't liking the veggie food.
I did get to have some great conversation with PH and that was fabulous, because she is awesome, and her fiance seems cool too, even though we was getting sleepy towards the end of the night.
A plan was made to go K-oke but it was just past midnight and if I wanted to be sure to get home via bus, I was going to have to cut-out. Although it pained me greatly, as we all know, I love singing.
M&P were leaving too, so I asked if I could get a ride to the bus stop, but the kind souls offered to drive me home, which I gratefully accepted.

It was a great night.
Laughter, old friends, libations.
Who could ask for more?

Day 96--Women & Baseball special!!!

2009-06-13T14:42:00.000-05:00

Today was spent blogging.
Lots and lots of blogging.

I had let the ol' blog fall by the wayside so I decided to take matters into my own hands.
And I recapped my recession filled life.
As I was about a week and a half behind, this really did take quite sometime.

E and I then traveled to the Brewer game.
Brewers vs. the White Sox, the first of a three game series.
I believe it was my first White Sox game of recent memory, but I can say with full confidence:

White Sox fans are 100% less douchey than Cubs fans:
1. They didn't boo their team (which I don't like at all, as it is not exhibiting true sportsmanship).
2. They stayed for the whole game (and the Crew was up 7-2 in the top of the 9th)
2. Some Sox fans sitting in front of us actually engaged us in conversation (okay maybe a little too much conversation, but better than yelling expletives at Brewer players/fans, I suppose).
3. They not only talked about Milwaukee, and how much they liked the city,but baseball, which in my experience, Cubs fans never do. Mostly because they are:
a. too drunk
b. mouths are full of Miller Park's awesome concessions/bevvies
c. Cubs fans don't really know anything about baseball
d. They're too busy yelling nonsense threats to Lou Pinella or Brewer fans.

This is not to say I didn't see some jerk White Sox fans, but I see jerk Brewer fans at every game. So I take them with a grain of salt.

I would also like to point out the sheer effing RIDICULOUSNESS of the GD Miller Cheerleaders.
The Diamond Dancers I believe they are called.
Since when does Baseball need cheerleaders?
Actually, since when does any sport need cheerleaders, to be perfectly honest, but this is in reference to Brewers Baseball.
The girls are dressed in typical stipper-slutty sparkly outfits and while their moves aren't incredibly lewd (Thank god for small favors), their dance before the game was pointless. The song had nothing to do with getting the crowd or the teams pumped up, in fact, I would say it wasn't really a prototypical dance tune.
As if having to watch booty-shaking dance/fitness majors from UWM wasn't bad enough at the start of the game, they even had a dance for that good ol' 7th inning stretch.
Yep.
They have a dance for "Take Me Out to the Ballgame."
WTF?
Seriously.
Double-you.
Tee.
Eff.

If a dance show is REQUIRED for Brewers baseball, which let's be real, I think a dozen people in the audience were watching, let's have it be from local college teams, or high school teams. Teams that are doing high-class stunts "Bring It On" style. I'm not doubting their athletic ability, just it's place at a baseball game (and dare I say it, basketball and football games).
Doesn't this just promote the notion that women are to be looked at and admired rather than actually contributing anything? Let's not forget the comment that Mets' announcer Hernandez made in 2006, in regards to the San Diego Padres' massage therapist, which was, "I won't say that women belong in the kitchen, but they don't belong in the dugout."
This begs the question of where DO women belong then?
We can be on the Supreme Court, but not rubbing out a tweaked calf muscle in a major league dugout.
Classy.

Tonight's game also taught me that although I have to have some knowledge about baseball, as I keep score, and keep score well, I might add, if a neighbor has a question, they will ask E. and not me.

Case in point:
Bottom of the 6th.
Two outs.
Crew is down by a run.
Pitcher is due up to bat.
Now Suppan isn't an ace by any means.
On a good day he is a work horse, an innings eater.
And I suppose one would say that this was the case for this day.
So the Sox intentionally walk Kendall to get to the pitcher.
All of the Brewer fans think we will just pinch hit for Suppan.
But Macha leaves him in.
No one can figure it out (although to be fair he only had 77 pitches going into the 7th, which is a decent count).
So we shrug our shoulders and cheer on "Sooooouuuuuuuuppppppp" which can sound like "Boo" but I'm fairly confident that the crowd was saying "Sooouuuupppp."
The guy sitting behind us taps E on the shoulder and asks him why he would do that?
E just kind of shrugs his shoulder, and we continue to cheer on as Suppan gets a bloop single that scores the tying run.
I look in my scorebook and see that at the top of the 7th Suppan has to face the bottom of their order, which TOGETHER might have an average of .200, remember the pitcher doesn't hit in AL games.
Add that to the fact that Supes has been pitching well that game, only has 77 pitches, and did actually get a hit earlier in the game...it all kind of makes sense.
Sure, if it would have backfired we would be cursing Macha, but in the end it began a rally for the Crew.
I guess girls' do know some stuff.

Day 95

2009-06-12T16:10:00.000-05:00

While the hooch I brought to the BBQ was delicious at the time, I PROBABLY (hindsight is 20/20) should have eaten something before drinking ALL of it.
Because as much as I love veggie burgers, they NEVER do me good after a night of drinking.
NEVER.

So needless to say.
I slept in.
And had a headache.

The good news?
It was the perfect pretense to take in the Brewer game.
A game they lost, but at least (well not at least) they are putting up SOME kind of a fight.
I suppose one could say that is the good news.
Of the last five games we lost, we lost by one run in four of the them...the other one was by two runs.
But I'm kind of done with losing.
We need to win if we want to keep our lead in the NL Central which has now dwindled to a mere half game lead over the Cards.
And it's not like we play well vs. the American League.
The plus, is that most NL teams don't play well vs. the AL.
One glimmer of hope I guess.

Other than the ball game, I spent a rather cool day in the house, finishing up my book, which I can say I enjoyed and would recommend to others.
Next on my reading list?
Confederacy of Dunces, which I've heard only good things about, so we will see.
Obs I will keep you posted.

Day 94

2009-06-12T15:47:00.000-05:00

Cue working girl shopping montage.
Cue heavy-synthesized music while girl is blow-drying hair and applying mascara and lip gloss.
Cue heary laughter and hand shakes
Cue toasting a new job.

Except.
It didn't exactly happen.

Sure I had to get up kind of early, take the bus to E's work, pick up the car, drive to Target, buy an interview outfit since our washing machine/sink is broken/un-usuable and I didn't have time to dig and search and go to the laundromat. If I was a grown-up I would have had time to have my things dry cleaned, but instead, I went to Great America the day before, kind of forgot I had nothing to wear and thus had to run to Target.

I found some brown linen pants, a mauve shell, and a cream colored ruffly cardigan type thing I thought would be a good choice.

By some miracle I get home from my adventures on time and hop in the shower and start preparing, physically and mentally, for said interview.
Outfit--check.
Makeup--check.
Hair--check.
Interview questions--check.

Everything is set and ready to go.
We begin the interview process.
And I have to say.
I don't think I did that well.
I mean.
I think I did okay.
Average, perhaps.
But I didn't really feel a rapor.
Like it all felt very stilted, and stop and go.
Maybe this is because they aren't used to giving interviews?
Maybe it's because I didn't give great answers?
I don't know.
Let's just say, it won't be a shocker if I don't get the job.
But.
BUT!
At least I got thru the first couple stages.
Which must mean that my resume doesn't suck completely, nor does my cover letter.
So that is good news.
I can't say that the interview was a learning experience since it seems like:
1. I can't remember anything they asked that I found particularily difficult
2. I have no prospects on the horizon
Sure I've been applying but no one's been contacting me.
*SIGH*
Maybe I was excited because I knew after the interview I was going to go to PO's house for a family/friend BBQ.

So upon arriving home, I told E the meh-news of my interview, and we packed up some beers and hooch (vodka-lemonade for those keeping track at home) and veggie burgers and made our way over.

And I have to say it was a great time.
Good stories by all.
Even if it was bittersweet as half of the party was moving this weeked.
Which seems to be the story of my life...I once wrote this short story where someone commented, "I feel like I just met all these really cool people and then found out that they or I am moving away the next day" and in this case it was true.
Such is life.

Make new friends.
But keep the old.
One is silver and the other gold.

Day 93

2009-06-12T15:12:00.000-05:00

Today I woke up at 430 in the morning, couldn't get back to sleep so actually got out of bed at 5am and read my book, The Future of Love by Shirley Abbott.
I know the book sounds totally lame, but is actually pretty good, and it reminds me of something I might write. It also reminds me I shouldn't judge a book by it's title, and is my first book of the A's in the Washington Park Libes. But in full disclosure I did skip a book that was laden with an African-English dialect and I can't handle reading dialects. I will only do so when forced, otherwise I feel it's not worth it, generally.
Anyway, Abbott's work kept me entertained and yet was literary. And as an added bonus I will be looking for more of her work at the libes, although it appears this was her first work of fiction.

I put a sizeable dent in the book and then watched...wait for it...
The Nanny Diaries.
Which was actually, a lot better than I thought it would be. I missed the last five minutes, where I assume she meets the guy with the a-hole friends at his beach home, which I'm sure you know I would love to do without.
But I could be wrong, maybe she doesn't hook up with him to which I would say "Yay!" as I really feel it would change the dynamic of the movie.
So I can't give a full review of the film, but I can say it was decent up to the last 10 minutes.

I had to give up on the last 10 minutes of the film because we were on our way to Great American with our neighbors' foreign exchange student, MK. She's leaving soon and Great America was on her list of things to do while she was here.

So we went, again, for the second time in as many weeks I believe.
And while it was busier, we still got to go on the Superman twice, AND since MK was with I got to do the Giant Drop, which was scarier than I expected, but oh-so-fun.
Not so fun?
The last ride we went on, where we got completely effing soaked.
And then had to walk to the car and drive home in soaking wet clothes.
Boo.
Boo-zoes to that.

Day 92

2009-06-12T14:40:00.000-05:00

Recession news:
New interview!
Well kind of.
It's with the same company that I phone interviewed/took assesments for. Apparently the hiring managers thought I was worth a look-see at.
So I will be interviewing on Wednesday at 1 pm.
Wish me some sort of luck.

In other news today it started out cold, then warmed up rather pleasantly, albeit quickly, and then there were tornado warnings and sirens abounding.
All news said it was south of us so I didn't have to take the dogs into the basement or any such thing like that, but we did have to hear the tornado sirens for about a half and hour.
And then it rained.
And then it was done.
There wasn't even any thunder or lightning from where we stood.
Boo.
If I'm hearing tornado sirens I want thunder.
Lightning.
The way you love me is frightening.
Wait, wha???

Later in the day we had our First Annual Cold Spring Park Board meeting.
And guess who got re-elected to the board?!?!
Yep.
Right here.
I got your CSP Board Members...
Right down here.
Sorry, that was from high school.
And I wonder why I can't use my powers for good rather than mindless drivel.
Anyway.
So another illustrious year of leading CSP out of the darkness of the ghetto and into the light of suburbia.
Jay kay.
Jay kay.
And let's be real. It was an uncontested race. So if I dropped out and put Super on the ballot, she probably would have won.
Still don't know about my position but I'm gunning for secretary again or veep.
It was a good time.

The meeting itself went okay, I would have liked a better turn out but to quote MG, "Whatever."
I kept myself from being negative during the SOHI presentation, so I thought I did a good job that way. And we found out that the Chinese restaurant is good, per the Alderman, so I'm hoping for the best, our next meeting will be held there so I will keep you posted.

On the docket for tomorrow?
Great America!!!
You are totally jealous, aren't you???

Day 91

2009-06-12T13:52:00.000-05:00

Today was one of the most wholesome, yet fun days I've had in a while.
To celebrate my aunt and cousin-in-law's birthday, they planned a family softball game.
To be perfectly honest, I hadn't played softball, since the CSP/Concordia game a couple of years ago.
And I did not do a good job that time.
I was bumped from first to the outfield.
However.
This game.
I showed 'em my skills.
Due to the fact that no one else took first, I took it, thinking I could re-live my freshman year softball antics.
Although apprehensive at first, I have to say I did pretty well.
Most of the balls I fielded were from Z whom I've mentioned before as the prospective baseball player of the family.
So these were some bullets.
Me pops also told me that while I was playing catcher (the at-bat team had to provide their own catcher) I, too, threw some bullets.
Also a little known fact:
I'm an opposite field hitter.
So much that they had to put the shift on while I hit.
Which I then beat at my next at bat.
I got accolades from everyone, mostly because I think I was the only girl who did any type of fielding or hitting.
But I'll take it.
And it totally made me want to play softball.
But I'm nervous about joining a league because I don't want it to be serious because I'm not that good.
I will just have to save my talents for the annual softball game, or arrange one myself.
I can only imagine I would get better if I played every week, as my skills were improving as the game went on.

By the time we were heading home we already could feel the soreness seeping in.
Being old is so so lame.

In other news, for their birthdays I made them (big shocker here) mixed cd's.
Is it lame that this is what I do for everyone's birthday/life event?
1. I don't have a job, and sometimes I do purchase a song if it's incredibly necessary.
2. Numerous people have told me I am a good mixed cd maker.
3. I really enjoy doing it.
4. I think there is a level of personal-ness that goes into it.

So I made them mixed cd's.
For my aunt:
Feelin' Fine at 49
1. We've Only Just Begun--Grant Lee Buffalo
2. Feelin' the Same Way--Norah Jones
3. Cecilia--Simon & Garfunkel
4. Poison Ivy--The Coasters
5. With a Little Help From My Friends--Joe Cocker
6. Wizard of Oz (main title)--MGM Orchestra
7. Forever Young--Alphaville
8. Waterloo--Abba
9. Ventura Highway--America
10. Pick Up the Pieces--Average White Band
11. No Matter What--Badfinger
12. The General Specific--Band of Horses
13. Summer Breeze--Seals & Croft
14. Big Sun--Eddie Vedder
15. Let 'Em In--Paul McCartney
16. At the Hop--Devendra Banhart
17. Beloved Wife--Natalie Merchant
18. Bitterblue--Cat Stevens

I thought it was a good mix of stuff she liked, and I liked. And who would think that a 49 year old born-again would be listening to Band of Horses or Devendra Banhart?
Eh?

And for the cousin-in-law:
Talkin' Jive at 25
1. Feel Good Inc.--Gorillaz
2. Maneater--Hall & Oates
3. Let Go--Frou Frou
4. Too Big for Gidget--The Brunettes
5. Take a Chance--The Magic Numbers
6. Sun, Sun, Sun--The Elected
7. The Frug--Rilo Kiley
8. Chick Habit--April March
9. No One's Gonna Love You--Band of Horses
10. Close to Me--The Cure
11. And She Was--The Talking Heads
12. Silly Love Songs--Wings
13. Basement Apt.--Sarah Harmer
14. Time--Alan Parsons Project
15. The Bleeding Heart Show--The New Pornographers
16. Fake Empire--The National
17. Family Tree--Belle & Sebastian
18. Brimfull of Asher--Cornershop

Way more indie but still had some good old ones that everyone should know and love.
I hope you don't find it vain that I put the mixes on here, it's just that a lot of people ask what goes on them, so I thought I would oblige ahead of time.

Day 90

2009-06-12T12:49:00.000-05:00

Hey little sister, what have you done?

Today E and I got to go to a Catholic wedding.
And, contrary to popular belief.
We did not burst into flames upon entering the building.
And, contrary to our belief;
The ceremony was not an hour and a half.
We learned later this was due to the large amount of Lutherans in the audience.
I don't know who the Catholics hate more:
Lutherans, Athiests, gays or Jews.
A conundrum, if ever there was.

As E and I had hung out with M&Z the night before, I was a little, how you say...hungover.
Nothing a cup of coffee and a couple aleve couldn't fix.
Of COURSE I sleep in and we still haven't purchased a wedding gift.
And we need to shower and iron and everything else normal people would allot time for.
But.
As I'm sure you've figured out by now, E and I are not normal people.
We barely consider ourselves grown-ups.

So we run to the BS Supercenter for a gift card (why we didn't do this between the ceremony and reception I have no idea...because we aren't grown-ups). We shower/press/primp and leave the house about 15 minutes before the wedding is due to start.
Which technically should have been enough time as we do not live far from down town.
Except.
(Oh there is always one of these...)
Riversplash was going on.
So every street that we wanted to turn down was closed.
No worries.
We get there, according to the clock on the church, with about 5 minutes to spare, which, to be honest was earlier than we got to M&M's wedding a couple weeks prior.

We walk in and the whole wedding party is there, waiting to go down the aisle.
Since when do weddings start on time???
NOBODY directs us which way to go to get into the sanctuary.
It would have been fine if they would've just told us to wait until the wedding got underway or whatever, but they just looked at us and then looked straight ahead.
Apparently they've all taken a vow of silence.
So we see a door to the left and head that way.
And I run directly into the priest.
Literally.
Smacked into him.
He didn't seem upset or anything, but also didn't give us direction into the way into the church.
So we sneak in, the whole congregation looking at us and take a seat in the last unoccupied row and hope for the best.
The ceremony is fine.
E and I are convinced that the priest is gay, we get confused during the Catholic rituals that aren't especially welcoming of others, and again I'm baffled by the weirdo Lord's Prayer that they say...AND there was some weird book of the Bibes that was quoted that I'm SURE isn't in the KJV.
Catholics have their own Bibes?
I think I knew this at one time, but have since forgot. Since I know almost no one that is a practicing Catholic.

What we SHOULD have done in the two hour interval of the ceremony and cocktail hour was go home.
What we DID do was go to Sbux for a coffee and newspaper.
Which was fine for the first hour and a half as I had the Shepherd crossword to work on, but after that we were both getting antsy.
Plus it was cold and rainy.
Finally 5 came and we noshed on mostly vegetarian appetizers (delicious!) and (free!!) champagne, wine and beer.
YES.

I talked to the bride a bit and then it was time to eat dinner, which was okay.
We got bread which was great, and a salad which was also good.
The dinner itself was okay.
It confirmed my belief that I don't like portabella mushrooms (this was the vegetarian option), but it did have a nice veggie medley on the side and whatever was on top of the mushroom (a cheese/pesto mix?) went well with the pasta underneath the mushroom.
But I DID try the mushroom.
So there.

We stayed until about 11, didn't dance at all (really odd selection of music if I do say so myself) but had a great time talking with former co-workers. I heart the gays, what can I say?

E had to open the next day, and we had a family softball game to go to.
I had to bring the A-game, so we said our goodbyes and snuck out.

All in all, good times.

Day 89

2009-06-12T12:30:00.000-05:00

Farm Share Day!
Farm Share Day!

E and I get ridiculously excited at the prospect of fresh, organic produce every Friday. We get stuff we might not otherwise buy and we have been fairly good at making recipes with said ingredients.
What is hard, I've noticed is that although E claims to like sweets, we've had leftovers (now bad) of all the "sweet" things I've made. So as much as E says he was a sweet tooth, we are definitely savory eaters.
Or I need to figure out how to make 1/4 portions of the sweet stuff.
Either way, I'm still really proud that we've eaten as much as we have of the produce.

As a scam to get our CSPBFFs to hang out with us we offered to pick up the farm share and then drop it off later in the evening and we could hang and play games. The scam worked and we mosied over to M&Z's place shortly after their son's purported bed time to have some classy adult time.
And by classy I mean alcohol out of glasses and a couple games of Blokus on their newly sodded back patio. With some super cute new patio lights.
Their patio is way cuter than our patio.
And I totally lost (first one out) in Blokus.
I'm not very good at game nights apparently.

I sometimes wish E and I had some of that "Keeping Up With the Joneses/Type A" that I've heard so much about, but alas, we seem to be really content with our mediocre house and patio.
Well, I guess I shouldn't say content. We (I) am working on scraping the walls since that is free and doesn't require money.
When I feel like it.
Slow and steady wins the race?
Meh?

Day 88--Too Late to Apologize?

2009-06-12T12:12:00.000-05:00

Apologies apologies.
I'm the bearer of broken promises.
I promise to stay on the up and up with the blogosphere.
And it's come to this.
Perhaps I should change the name of this blog to that of "Captain of the H.M.S. Flake."

So I hope it's not "Too Late to 'Pologize (too late!)" and here I am begging forgiveness once again.

But the good news is, is that apparently I had quite a busy week and a half and I should be able to recount said days in chronological order.

Today was a day of leisure. There really is no way around it. We had made plans to hang out with K&E and have a Mexican/MLB Monopoly night.
The alliteration was just an added bonus.
So we had delicious enchiladas and spanish rice, and talked about the good ol' days of Sbux, the bad new days of Sbux, and chided K for being an AL fan.
All in good fun of course.
I also, in perfect Jj fashion made a complete ASS out of myself whilst complaining about a former manager of mine, who happened to be friends with K.
Way to go Jj.
Way to go.
I haven't felt so embarassed since...
Seriously, I can't really think of a time.
In my defense, I really, truly did think she was a horrible manager, and I probably shouldn't have used so many personal perjoratives to describe said managing style.
Eekzoes.
So maybe she is a great person to have a drink with, and not work with.
Sorry KW, sorry.
I wish I could blame the recession for my behavior, but alas, I'm afraid I've always been a bit of the c-word. True.

We like hanging out with K&E because they are crazy animal people like we are.
Except they like cats, which is weird for us, cos we like dogs.
Except we like greyhounds, which are like big cats, except maybe with more of a penchant for taco dip.
My favorite line of the night:
Jj: Super's not really a great mouser.
ES: Super would only like a mouse if it was covered in taco dip.
So so true.

MLB Monopoly News:
I started off strong, but lost it all in the end and was content to finish off my bottle of wine watching ES slowly build his empire.
At 2 am he was declared champion by a tired KW and EC.

I would have done better if it was Triva Pursuit.
Which no one will play with me.
Boozoes.

Day 87

2009-06-04T11:10:00.000-05:00

Today was kind of a waste.
I did a lot of reading, when I should have been cleaning or gardening.
But!
1. It was freezing in my house which led me to believe it was freezing outside which led me to believe that it would be too cold to garden.
2. Because it was so cold in our house I was too afraid to move to much to keep from getting a chill so I bundled up on the couch and read.

We did have plans for later in the evening which included meeting up with some old BT work peeps at the Old German Beer Hall for SN's birthday. Which I have never been before. I did like the bar, but felt the beer was kind of expensive. Don't get me wrong, it was good, but just kind of expensive. I ended up switching to wine (Riesling) after my first 1/2 liter as I have the bladder the size of a pea, and I hadn't eaten anything that day (because I think I was going to go running...and I don't like to run after I've eaten), so I had to take it down a notch.

I was the first one there, which didn't surprise me, as E had a meeting with some film/tv folks for a potential shoot in the next month or so and that was at 5, and since they all have jobs I knew I would be there early.

Which was fine with me as I had brought a book to read, and the bar wasn't crowded at all and it had German music on which was fairly easy to ignore. Plus I was reading a great chapter on hecklers in baseball (in case you weren't aware, I'm currently reading only baseball books right now, after this one is done, I have a fiction book to read, not baseball related. I know how to keep my obsessions under control).

While I love hanging out with my old work friends, there is some awkwardness always with the ones I don't see, or make a point to see on a regular basis. With SN and JL there is no weirdness cos I talk to them enough, but with the others it's always "What have you been up to?" and I feel like I should have something concrete to show them and I don't.
Don't get me wrong, I tell them all about the garden, the jogging, the baking, the cooking, the reading, etc. but that just makes it seem like I'm on an extended vacation. Which, let's be real, is how I look at this unemployment, this "ass time" as MB so gracefully put it.

Then there is always the question of "coming back."
"Would you come back?"
And I should clarify, it's not coming back as a copywriter, which to be honest, I loved. I really, really enjoyed that job.
It's to come back as a Merchandise Assistant, which is like a secretary or an admin. Which there is nothing wrong with, I'm pretty sure I've applied for some admin jobs out there.
And when I say no, it's "Don't you miss us?"
Yes, but not to the point where I want a shitty job back, just to have some fun down time.
I think the problem is, is that I am a really good actress, so while I hated my job on the inside, so much that it was making me sick in the morning (true story) I would buck up and put on a happy face.
And in all reality it wasn't the actual work I hated, I didn't hate the people, I hated the stress that was all around me all of the time. I hated that I was using none of my skills (and I do have some skills!) ever, except when someone in the pod had a trivia question. I was always the go-to person for that.
Not to mention, this is a company that just laid me off (okay so maybe not JUST), forgive me if I don't have the full confidence to jump right back on that potentially sinking ship.

But. I did get to meet SN's family which was super cute.

E had to open in the morning, so we decided to head out early. Plus I had only eaten the cheese curds that we had ordered and food was needed. We decided to drive down Wells, hoping something in the Marquette vicinity would be open.
And it was.
We settled for Qdoba which happened to have to cops eating inside.
I mention this because upon exiting the car, I was not driving, I promptly fell on my butt.
I fell out of the car.
Seriously.
I looked, like a drunk college girl.
And I wasn't drunk.
Nor am I in college.
In my defense, and E can attest to this.
I was wearing heels and E had parked right next to a pot-hole, which I promptly stepped in, causing my fall.
But I seriously felt like a moron.

In other news.
The Brewers FINALLY won a game vs. the Fish.
Here's to hoping we can pull one out tomorrow so we can at least split the series.

Day 86

2009-06-03T10:43:00.000-05:00

Roller Coaster!
(of love--say what?)
Roller Coaster
ooh ooh ooh!

Last fall our CSP besties M&Z suggested we all go to Great America for Fright Fest.
We were quite excited at this prospect and upon looking at prices and such, we thought it would be a good idea if we got season passes. At the time a season pass included Fright Fest's admission and unlimited for the NEXT season. So this year. We worked it out and if we just went ONCE this season the pass would be worth it.

So today we made our season pass worth it.
And it was freaking awesome.
E. had the brilliant idea that we should try to go on a weekday before school got out.
Which is pretty genius.
So he had the day off, I always have the day off so we decided it would be a good day to try it out.
A couple glitches occurred:
1. it was cloudy out, like cloudy where it looked like it would probably rain. We looked into the weather and the highest percentage chance of rain was as we were looking at the weather. So we decided to chance it. It's not like we were "paying" to get in. We could always go next Tuesday if need be.
2. I couldn't find my season pass. I knew it was in my chain wallet that AA had gotten for me like five years ago. Which will now be my Great America wallet. Needless to say, I found it, pass and extra ticket still inside. YES!

Before leaving I did my unemployment duty of applying for two jobs, filing for my UI for the week, and received a phone call from the company that I had the testing for. Apparently I did okay on the tests (shocker!) and they are presenting me as a candidate to the hiring manager at the end of this week, so I should hear from them next week, if I'm presented in a favorable fashion. So that is some good news on the job front.
Or at least "Meh?" news.

The drive down is rain-free full of music trivia, which E is not good at, but he did make a point that if it was History, he would have done better. Next time I may just bring some Trivial Pursuit cards. So we can both feel smart.

From interviewing 24 times in Waukegan, I knew there was a way to get to Great America avoiding tolls. And there was.
And.
There were two shopping centers to pick from so parking would be free.
Because parking is $15.
Seriously.
There is a recession and we have decided even if I get a job, we are going to continue our ridiculously thrifty ways.
You know, for funzies!

I'm not gonna lie, it was probably a mile walk from the shopping center to the park, but we felt a day of leisure should begin and end with a brisk walk. But what could be better? You save $15 and you get some exercise. Win-win if you ask me.

We get to the park and it's obviously not busy. Which is great.
The first ride we go on is the Superman.
Which, is really effing scary. I'm not gonna lie.
The line was one of the longest we had to wait in, which was 15 minutes.
SERIOUSLY.
It was great.
We got to go on all the roller coasters, and went on the V-2 and the Raging Bull twice.
I have to say I was highly disappointed in the Dark Knight Ride. It was super short, and really not that great. Skip it if you have to wait in line for more than 10 minutes.
But all the other rides were great. Even E said the Whizzer was better than he thought it would be.
Faves: V-2, the Batman, Raging Bull
Least Faves: The Whizzer and the Dark Knight

And I'm not gonna lie, I was scared to go on the V-2 (Vertical Velocity) because most of the people right before us looked like they were all going to throw up. But, it was so super fun I couldn't stop laughing, which is what I do on roller coasters, laugh and giggle.

After our day of ridiculous fun and laughter we both settled in for a night of baseball and then after watching Manny Parra fall apart in the 3rd and 4th inning rather than the 5th, I decided to read and listen to the soft rock station on cable, which is probably one of my favorite stations of all time.

It was definitely a day of too much fun for one hand.

Day 85

2009-06-03T09:15:00.000-05:00

I really did have grand plans for today.
Mostly they involved jogging and blogging.
Rhymetown USA.

Unfortunately, a threat of rain (and the subsequent getting wet) kept me inside.
So E and I had to drive (rather than walk) to the library to pick up some new books, return bad cd's (The Atari's, the A section has not been treating me all that well as of late...but I have Air now so am expecting a little more), and get new movies.

We did all of the above, and then traveled to Outpost to stock up on our bulk goods, and some non-bulk goods. We are getting really good at not spending a ton of money there. Since we had just bought about 10 pounds of flour, E had some tips leftover so we decided to go to Target to see if we could find some glass jars, since I need big ones, and I have been having a hard time finding even small ones at the stores of thrift.
But in a pleasant turn of events, they had huge jars for like $13. Which we were quite excited about. They easily will hold at least 10lbs of flour each, and we also bought a smaller one for the wheat flour, which will hold probably 5lbs of flour.
This may seem like an insane amount of flour for non-amish folk.
But we make almost all of our bread products, and I like to make them a little healthier so I will use whole wheat flour. Plus with all the ridiculous baking I've been doing lately...it's a lot of flour kids.
Alot.
But E and I were both happy with our purchase (and we had some $$$ leftover! When does that happen???) and we now have pretty jars for our flour, which had been causing us some stress.
Seriously.
We're not stressed because I don't have a job, but because we didn't have adequate storage for our flour.
This is my life.

Upon arriving home, we did a little quick clean of the kitchen, put away (or "up" as E. says) the goods and decided to watch a movie. Since we had a couple of hours before the Brewer game started.
The problem was that we each rented movies from the library and didn't want to watch what the other person picked out.
E. had checked out Taken starring Liam Neeson. Bleah.
I had checked out Angels in America with lots of famous people. But he didn't want to watch that. Which I kind of understand as he's been watching Band of Brothers, which is heavy, and it's not like Angels in America is light fare. It's about a group of seemingly unrelated people dealing with the AIDS crisis in the mid-80s.
So we settled on an Amy Heckerling film called I Could Never Be Your Woman which was actually really funny and good.
And it had Paul Rudd in it.
Who is Totes McGotes dreamy.

For dinner I made a blue-cheese/apple/almond salad with some of the greens from our crop share. E thought the salad was a little sweet, but I thought it was delicious.

We then took in a bit of the Brewers game until Jorge Julio gave up a babillion runs and I had to turn it off for fear my blood pressure would give me a heart attack.

I decided to try out my library movie. While I loved it, and definitely want to see it in its' entirety, the DVD stopped working less than half way through. I have since requested another copy from the library, because it was quite good, the hour I saw of it anyway.
Plus I don't think Mary Louise Parker can do any wrong.

Day 84

2009-06-01T12:01:00.000-05:00

I'm not gonna lie.
I had a wicked headache upon waking up this morning.
A bottle of wine will do that to a girl.
I felt worse for my fellow griller-outers (and E. who had to open) as they all had to wake up early.
I woke up thinking it was 11 or noon and was oh-so-relieved when I found out it was only 8.
YES!
I still woke up around 930, which is early for me, yes still.
Since I missed the previous day's ball game, I decided that would be great Sunday morning activity, and then I would go to work in the garden, as I have weeds a-go-go back there.
And, while I think my vegetable bed will be filled, I have lots of open space, so I will need to buy more flowers, I'm afraid.
ARGH!
I have learned in my seedling starting ways, that while my sunflowers are doing GREAT, my other flowers I bought are not doing so great, I will try again next year, but I will plan better.

So I watched the game on the computer, transplanted the rest of my veggie seedlings (my Hungarian peppers aren't big enough yet...well I don't think they're big enough) and started weeding and digging out the prickliest of weeds.

In an effort to fit into my clothes again, I've decided to cut back on the day drinking so I didn't have a Corona with Uecker on the radio, and it was still quite lovely and enjoyable and I got just as good a tan!
It's true, kids.
My arms are almost as dark as my southern Californian mate's.
Take that!

While I made progress, I'm not done, and will need to get some wood chips (who has a truck I can borrow???) to curb the regrowing of the dreaded weeds.

In other news, I firmly believe that what I thought was rhubarb growing in my backyard, is actually a weed.
Which means...
I can get rid of it!!!
Because I've been schooling myself on local food, and growing food, although I'm not a huge fan of rhubarb, I felt I couldn't get rid of this plant that was flourishing, even thought it is the ugliest plant, in my opinion.
But it seemed like the stalks weren't ripening at all, and they are fuzzy, which the rhubarb we got from the farm share is not.
In doing research, I learned that it most likely isn't rhubarb at all as rhubarb isn't fuzzy like this stuff. This is plant that is related to rhubarb called Burdock.
Which will grow burrs this fall, or next if left to grow.
Boo.
While I did see you could cook with it, I really, truly TRULY hate burrs, and had to deal with them when we first moved in as our backyard was a jungle.
So.
If you want some burdock feel free.
I have a feeling it's going to be a beast to dig up.
But then my peony will be able to grow better.
Planning (and keeping!) a garden is hard.
But I'm trying.

E and I decided to continue to enjoy the weather by grilling out for dinner.

I then watched three bad movies:
The latest Indian Jones film: seriously!?!?! Aliens? I thought that someecard was a joke.
Live Nude Girls: Which wasn't good at all, but could see how people would like it in the mid-90s.
Pop. 436: Which was a thriller, but was totally predictable. But at least it had Jeremy Sisto and his dog, Winston Sisto in it. Which is totally cute.

Day 83

2009-06-01T11:25:00.000-05:00

Saturday in the Park...
Truly it was a Saturday in the park.
It wasn't he fourth of July.

Today was our neighborhood's first annual Spring Fling.
An event for neighbors to get together, spruce up the Cold Spring Park Gardens, sign-up to be a member, and get some lunch.

For being as unprepared as I felt in the days leading up to the event, I was quite happy to see kids show up to help weed the garden, play games and plant some grass. It makes me happy to know that these kids just need enrichment activities, and they will embrace them. They worked hard, and seemed to have fun.

The lunch was a bit of a debacle as the providers were given a grossly inflated number of attendees, but after lots of embarassing apologies from our pres, MG, they seemed okay with only giving away 25 free hot dogs, rather than the 200 that they were promised.
Eek.

But at one point we had around 50 people (mostly kids) which is a good turn-out for the newsletters getting out so late.
And I had a couple kids ask where Super was.
She sure is popular, which is unfortunate, as she doesn't really like kids.
She doesn't hate them, but she really could just care less.

After the event we headed home to get together some food and beverages for a grill out with more neighbors.
For interested parties the menu that E and I brought:
veggie brats to be grilled
asparagus to be grilled
a rhubarb (with some apple) pie made from scratch. Yes. Even the crust...which was latticed on the top!!! (JT will be happy to know that that came from the 1957 Betty Crocker cook book he bought for me)
Mint Julep mix...also homemade, we got the mint from our farm share and E found a recipe.
It was delicious, although I don't think E. really liked it.
A bottle of white wine.

They have a fire pit, so it was quite a lovely rustic/urban (Rusban? Urbstic?) evening with neighbors/friends who aren't crazy and like to drink.

E and I were in bed by 11, which made me feel old, but I DID have a rock and roll show the night before, and manual labor that day, with nothing to eat except maybe an english muffin while waiting for Tucker (we were dog-sitting) to get picked up.

Long day, but good.
And in a couple of years we will have raspberry bushes at the garden!
Ooh.
Jammies!